My DD's first boyfriend is transgender and I feel weird about it.

[Milicentbystander72]

I've always been a very liberal minded person. Supported gay rights all my life. My best friend and DN are gay. I support the rights of Trans people to live their life etc.

My dd15 has a nice group of friends (boys and girls). In that group is a Trans teen (Female to Male). He changed his name in Y8, He's totally accepted as Male at school. There are no issues. He looks completely Male and people who don't know him would never think that he'd been born female. He's a nice boy who is well liked. All good.

Except last night my DD told me she's going out with him. I've surprised myself that this has unnerved me.

My dd hasn't had a BF before. She's only ever snogged one boy before at a party. She says she's 100% straight. She says she fancies the cool older boys in Sixth Form. Has teenage celebrity crushes on boys like Tom Holland etc. So how does this work for her?

Last night I told her all was fine and just to be careful they didn't damage a friendship if they broke up etc, but I didn't make a big deal of it.

Would you find this weird if your dc said they were straight? Please be honest. I'm kind of hoping it fizzles out without any drama.

Puberty blockers are the thalidomide of the day.

Are you seeking for them to be banned for the treatment of precocious puberty too then?

I still think it's for the Dr and patient to decide the best treatment for that individual.

I still think it's for the Dr and patient to decide the best treatment for that individual.
Even when the treatment has evidence it's harmful?

I'm not just talking about telling children that they can change sex though.

I'm talking about everything else that is said and the language used. When people are challenged on it they try to justify it by saying "I'm concerned about children being harmed through off label drugs and being lied to". But how does that explain people commenting on appearance for example?

There's concern and then there's just spiteful tittle tattle.

My DC has a child in their school whose parent has told them they can change sex. My DC is very young and says "they look like a ..." (insert opposite sex). I do comment on that child's appearance as my DC needs to know that hair styles and clothes don't change sex.
And the OP and several other "leave them alone they know what they are doing" posters have also commented on appearance.

Even when the treatment has evidence it's harmful

If the treatment is has no benefits, only downsides then no I don't think it should be prescribed but what drug does that apply to?

There are also many drugs prescribed that are known to have the potential to cause harm but they are still used under certain circumstances. I would not presume to tell drs what they can and cannot do. Particularly in this country the medical field is well regulated and research will be looking at the best course of action in these cases. I know that I don't have the information required to be telling medical professionals what they can and can't do.

There's concern and then there's just spiteful tittle tattle
This

Even when the treatment has evidence it's harmful?

Again do you campaign against other drugs if there is evidence that it is harmful? If so, please link to all relevant posts.

I do comment on that child's appearance as my DC needs to know that hair styles and clothes don't change sex.

Well I disagree with that. Why can't you have general discussions with your child about clothes and sex/gender without directly commenting on one specific child?

The world is changing so fast and its reaLllly scary....

I haven’t read all the replies - only the original question; but my answer is no I wouldn’t be happy with it. I don’t care to give reasons why; I just simply wouldn’t be happy with it. At all

The world may be changing, but biological sex will always remain immutable.

I still think it's for the Dr and patient to decide the best treatment for that individual

What information do patients have about these drug? What information do you think doctors have about these drug? The message constantly put of by TRAs that it is a harmless pause button? Based on what? Tavistock is prescribing it as part of a scandalously poor experiment which should never ever have got ethics approval. No other similar experiment would get ethics approval for any treatment as the experiment can’t tell them anything.

Thalidomide was thought by patients and doctors to the best treatment for that individual too. But the world has moved on, partly because of the thalidomide scandal.

"I'm concerned about children being harmed through off label drugs and being lied to". But how does that explain people commenting on appearance for example?

Because it's all tied in together. If you watched the video I linked a way back in this thread that poor woman has remarks made to her all the time, people react with shock when they hear or voice, they wonder if she's male or female. Personally, I think female-to-male transitioners 'pass' better than the other way around, but it's still obvious to most people that there's something odd. Who would want a lifetime of that for their child, rather than the child having psychiatric help if necessary, being told that they can dress how they like, but it's not possible to change sex?

Well, generally I reserve my ire for powerful, medications with potentially life-long side effects on bone development and cognition that are used off-license on healthy children to make their normally functioning, healthy bodies dysfunctional.

woodchuck 24 hours ago who were asking the same question you’re asking now. Specifically:

Again do you campaign against other drugs if there is evidence that it is harmful? If so, please link to all relevant posts.

My question at the time regarded what other drugs were off-label treatment for children that pathologised their healthy bodies.

Please link to your answer because I must have missed it

What information do patients have about these drug? What information do you think doctors have about these drug?
I don't know what info patients get because I'm not the patient.

I do know that when I'm offered a new drug the drs explain to me why they are considering it, what the benefits might be, what the side effects are and what the risks are so I have no reason to think that the same doesn't apply here.

As for what info drs have - well these drugs are prescribed for another condition and so all of the data is available to drs.

Are you asking for it to be banned for the treatment of precocious puberty too?

Who would want a lifetime of that for their child, rather than the child having psychiatric help if necessary, being told that they can dress how they like, but it's not possible to change sex?

A)what psychiatric help is available and how successful is it?

B)we don't have adequate mental health treatment available across the board as it is. Where do you see all of this help coming from?

C)what impact does it have on you if a person chooses to have X treatment rather than y?

I have my own views on the treatment of certain illnesses. I know what treatment I would and would not accept if I developed certain illnesses but I wouldn't presume to tell someone else that they were wrong for doing different to me.

My question at the time regarded what other drugs were off-label treatment for children that pathologised their healthy bodies.

What do you mean by healthy bodies though?

How about drugs used to treat ADHD? Those children have healthy bodies.

Are you asking for it to be banned for the treatment of precocious puberty too?

What a weird thing to ask.

Why would it be banned for precocious puberty, in which it's used for a year or two?

Even thalidomide is still used for Leprosy, banning for one reason doesn't mean banning for everything.

B)we don't have adequate mental health treatment available across the board as it is. Where do you see all of this help coming from?

How much do you think the treatment for children is costing, in the gender clinics? Mental health treatment would be a drop in the bucket compared to a lifetime of surgery and cross-sex drugs. Not to mention the physical damage to teenagers who are not considered old enough to make other decisions in their lives.

C)what impact does it have on you if a person chooses to have X treatment rather than y?

Are we supposed to not have any opinions on how children are treated? How come the incidence of GD has skyrocketed over the last few years? If those children had been born twenty years earlier would it even have occurred to them that they wanted to change sex?

How about drugs used to treat ADHD? Those children have healthy bodies.

Ritalin makes the brain produce dopamine, which is not produced to a normal level in children with ADHD.

My question at the time regarded what other drugs were off-label treatment for children that pathologised their healthy bodies.

What do you mean by "pathologised". Do you mean what drugs have adverse effects? What do you mean by "healthy bodies"?

How about drugs used to treat ADHD? Those children have healthy bodies.

But medication for ADHD isn’t off-licence. In fact, stimulant medication is incredibly closely regulated. It takes a long time to get a new stimulant medication (or stimulant medication on the market even for its proposed use, with recent examples such as Vyvanse and Intuniv in Australia having to go through a number trials to even be on the prescribing schedule.

Puberty blockers used to keep gender dysphoric children in a protracted, artificial prepubertal (tanner stage 11) state are being used off-licence. Where are the studies demonstrating their efficacy for use in treating dysphoric children? Where is the data about sexual function, libido, bone density and cognition?

A number of Australian doctors including paediatricians and psychiatrists are asking for a review of these drugs when used to treat gender dysphoria.

What do you mean by "pathologised".

Made a perfectly functioning hypothalamic-pituitary-gonadal hormonal system stop working.

Made a perfectly functioning hypothalamic-pituitary-gonadal hormonal system stop working.

Many drugs stop perfectly functioning systems from working well in order to treat another condition. The drug I take to treat one condition have effected my previously perfectly functioning liver for example. It is otherwise known as an "adverse effect" of the drug. Before taking it I discuss the pros and cons with my doctor and weighed up the benefits vs risks for me personally. I wouldn't expect some random on the internet who knows nothing about me and how the disease effects me to tell me I was wrong. Before you tell me that it is different because I am an adult, the same would apply if my children get the disease I have.

And to the poster who questioning the use of blocked in precocious puberty they’re fairly incomparable clinical scenarios.

Boys with central precious puberty are more likely to have a brain tumour and this potentially wider hormonal and physical issues. Their bodies aren’t healthy to begin with.

Most girls don’t have a brain tumour and their precious puberty is idiopathic (generally the younger the presentation the more likely there is brain pathology) but most are 6-7 years at presentation. At most there’d be 18 months or so of blockers- not five years or so. The closer they are to 8 years the more likely they are to be left to go through puberty naturally and many parents opt not to put their child through monthly injections and the potential medical side effects and don’t go there.

So that means your body wasn't actually healthy beforehand....