How would you feel if you received this email?

[SamCam349]

Is this (below) a nice email to receive? What would you think of the sender who wrote it??

‘I will reluctantly speak to you next Tuesday to attempt to address your discriminatory actions. As I mentioned last week, I, personally, do not consider you to be that important, and I would not be entertaining this call were your manager not also be participating.’

Sounds like the sender is being forced to "kiss and make up" whilst they feel like they are a victim. Sounds a bit like a childhood squabble where "mum" just wants everyone to get along, but they don't want to as they feel aggrieved . Whether they have reason or not we cannot tell.

Are you quite sure that’s what you intended to write dowehaveastalker?

Key example of why I’m slightly sceptical about the accuracy of the OP’s wording.

From how the OP is dealing with the thread at this point I’m wondering if they are someone who could have even driven me into writing similar...

Interesting suggestion that the sender could be a client rather than a colleague of the recipient. That might explain the unprofessional language, after all.
And also opens up the possibility that the recipient did nothing wrong and the client is a professional chancer trying to get money or free stuff by having a tantrum.

did someone get misgendered?

Some of these responses are as rude as the email in question

"Nice" is irrelevant, and a distraction here. Was it professional? Arguably not. Was it appropriate? We have no idea without context.

From how the OP is dealing with the thread at this point I’m wondering if they are someone who could have even driven me into writing similar...

My thoughts exactly.

Frustrating that you won't confirm whether you are the recipient or the sender.

It sounds like the recipient is a bigot who is unworthy of the usual respect we'd afford to people due to their (shocking?) actions.

It sounds like the sender is unaware of the the correct etiquette around professional communication as the email is badly worded and would not reflect well on them in any future disciplinary action. Although it may be that the recipients actions are bad enough to outweigh any petty sentiment that comes across in the email.

There is no chance this could ever be viewed as a "nice" email, that's a strange choice of word. It's hostile and unprofessional.

I'm wondering if its from a customer or client rather than a colleague.

It's not professional.
But.
Who ever has sent this is truly pissed off to the max.

The sender is very cross - but the email doesn’t make a lot of sense. Did you send the email op?

I am bemused by the choices nice or not nice. Surely no-one could think that was a "nice" e-mail?

OP did you send the email or receive it?
Your responses make it seem like you might have sent it and then someone's pulled you up on the wording?

Thats a horrible email to get and so unprofessional, regardless of actions I can't imagine anyone should be sending emails like that to colleagues

Depends how OP has been discriminated against.

Is English your first language? It's clearly hostile whether you sent it or received it.

OP - you are a bit of a nob. Your last reply (not answering anyone's questions) proves that. HTH

I would send it to HR tbh, I don't think that's an acceptable tone to use in the workplace no matter how angry you are.

OP! DID. YOU. SEND. OR. RECEIVE. THIS. EMAIL. IT. IS. NOT. CLEAR.

It's a very hostile and badly written email; the sender is obviously upset about some alleged discrimination, but has handled it very badly since. Whether sender or recipient, you've clearly got yourself into an almighty pickle OP, so you might as well explain in full and get whatever help people can give you before your meeting on Tuesday. Equally you'll look a little bit bad on either side, so you may as well explain which side you're on.

As well as the background of what happened that has been alleged to be discriminatory, I'd like to understand what exactly was said when telling this person last week that they were unimportant. A full timeline of events will be gone over in your Tuesday meeting, so let's unpick it here.

I have a suspicion from your posting style that you once found a spreadsheet, is it you?

In the scenario suggested you wouldn't expect them to be "nice"

I would expect them to be professional if I hoped to be taken seriously and wanted a positive outcome at the end of whatever this shitstorm is.

No matter what the discrimination, one has to at least try to keep the upper hand when it comes to dealing with stuff like this. Facts only. Making it personal is a big mistake and I would expect anyone who received that email to forward it to HR.

I find it hard to believe anyone would send such an unprofessional e mail.

Obviously not nice - that’s a bit of a silly question really when it’s a damning email which insults you and implies you have done something wrong.

What maybe you should be asking is whether what you did was wrong and how to either rectify or challenge it - asking here might help you get some perspective on that or helpful advice. It ‘being nice’ is irrelevant here as it’s clearly not!

Onalongsabbatical I wouldn't bother, OP is apparently on the train now and possibly half way through a "steep glass of red" so the thread might make even less sense if comes back

OP totally sent this email and a complaint was made and she doesn’t think it was all that bad.. so was double checking with mumsnet. Now op is too embarrassed to admit she acted like a tit.

If course it’s not nice I don’t know how anyone could think otherwise.