To have to tell someone

[FairyDust92]

Not to reach in and touch my child! Happened yesterday and my son is 10 weeks we were out for lunch and the waiter bent down and stroked his face! I said 'please do not touch my child' she then continued to touch his legs so I said again 'don't touch my child'. She actually took offence to this but I don't think I should have to tell people not to touch him. I don't know who she is or where she has been and to touch his bloody face! Wtf. Maybe I am over reacting but I cannot stand people touching him that I don't know. What comes over them to think they can stroke someone else's baby... it's bloody weird! 🤬

@teachermam I probably do if people think it's okay to reach into a pram to touch a child without asking first ☺️

No, YANBU at all! Good grief, I always ask if I can pet someone's dog, and not because it might bite me! Look but don't touch. A mother's hackles will instinctively rise if someone unknown gets too close to her baby. That's nature at work ensuring the survival of the species.

It's perfectly OK to tell a stranger to stop touching, just as you would if they touched you, only more so.

And do we really want children growing up boundary-less, with the belief that total strangers are entitled to pat, pinch, poke and fondle them without warning or consent?

Where does that lead?!

@NearlyGranny thank you! Exactly...

You seem like hard work.

Very very rude and OTT.

Yes definitely a parallel universe

I’d confine myself to smiling and saying ‘what a lovely baby’ or similar. I’d be a bit shocked at a stranger getting hands on with my kid. It’s crossing a social boundary apart from any other concern.

Yanbu.

And I am a very touchy feely person. And love babies. And would love cuddles with all babies. But I wouldn’t touch a baby I don’t know!! You have instincts to keep your baby safe.

A mother's hackles will instinctively rise if someone unknown gets too close to her baby

Mine didn’t . And I’ve had three of them!

Wait til they pull the hood up of the pram when baby is sleeping just so they can look

she wouldn’t touch an adult, so why does she have a right to touch a baby?

I hated this too... but it's just something people do unfortunately. You are being slightly unreasonable to expect that no one will try and touch your baby, even though I sympathise. If you've asked someone not to though I do think its then reasonable to be angry if they continue to.

Nah, it used to drive me mad. I know it comes from a place of affection (who doesn't love a cute little baby?) but who the fuck gives anyone the right to touch someone else's kid? And yes, PFB here too, accept I was probably being OTT but that's how I felt - and still feel, to an extent. I don't think you're being unreasonable OP.

Oh god, never go to Italy if you don’t want your children manhandled by strangers. I can see why it bothers you, but I actually think it’s completely harmless and I would just suck it up. When a waiter is taking her off you so you can finish your dinner you might not be so pissed off.

I'd rather not eat my dinner than a waiter take my child... 🙄 but I'm probably being a loon or unfair about that

Take my child?!? she touched him, not tried to kidnap him!

Only on Mumsnet aka a parallel universe would people be so precious. How sad that you don’t appreciate admiration, OP. And how odd.

You don't have to show admiration with touching surely?

Oh sorry - when did we...erm...”progress” to child kidnapping? I must have blinked. 🤣

oh dear

I'm with you OP. I have two kids, hate people touching my kids, no issues in telling them to get off.

You can feel however you want about it obviously, although I think you were rude and the poor woman probably felt embarrassed and upset. But I don’t understand why you’ve asked if you’re being unreasonable when you’re clearly in no doubt at all that you’re not

over reacting slightly. If they had kissed your child however, this would be an issue.!

When a waiter is taking her off you so you can finish your dinner you might not be so pissed off.

I never said about kidnapping... this was mentioned and I replied that I'd rather not have someone take my child. I'd rather go without.

For all you know the waiter had just been wiping the table with a dirty wash cloth before touching your baby.

How does that harm the baby? He's not going to lick his leg, after all. And babies manage to deposit considerably dirtier substances all over themselves all the time.