75% of mothers

[user87382294757]

...do all of the housework and childcare related tasks - no matter how many hours they work outside of this

I was a bit depressed to read this in the Independent newspaper today.

I wondered how mush of this rings true in your experience?

True in my house and we are in the process of separating. I do at least 98% of the housework and it took £1000s in counselling to get STBXH to simply contribute by emptying the dishwasher on a regular basis. He does 1 day week childcare.

FFS - the OP completely misunderstood the original story and now it’s been twisted again.

The survey DID NOT say that 75% of mothers do all the housework and childcare.

The survey DID NOT say that mothers do 75% of all housework and childcare

It actually said that 75% of mothers think they do the lion’s share of house work and childcare.

The actual survey doesn’t seem to be available so no definition for “lion’s share” is available, and nor is withhe methodology for the survey, so who knows how representative or significant it is.

The actual article (if you read it, which most posters seem not to have) is about perception of who does what/how much within relationships. Not some kind of time-use survey.

In my first marriage I did everything 100%.
Walked out and divorced him obviously not just about him being a lazy pig.
Met and married new DH and made a point to not make the same mistake again,and funnily enough housework is done mainly by him.
It`s never been discussed either we just get on with it.

Whilst discussion about who carries the domestic load is always valid,
Why am I talking an OP seriousky that:
Does not reference the article or survey
Does not reveal that it is based on a Netmums survey which was not carried out under any research protocols
Misunderstands and misrepresents the article
Asks an incomprehensible question for the poll. BU about what.

Very true in my house I work full time night shift and do everything and I mean everything including all housework and garden and cooking . My shift looks after the kids when I go to work but that's only after I've bathed them and they're asleep before I even go to do my 12.5 nightshift as a nurse!

My *dh not shift?

Not true at all. We share pretty equally though if anything DH does more.

True in our house, although family meals are 80% him

True for almost every married woman I know, thankfully not me, my husband and I do basically 50/50.

Why do you do everything ? Why can’t your DH clean the bathroom, sort out school bags, schedule dental appointments, buy presents for DC’s friends parties?

DH would have lasted five minutes if he thought he didn’t have to do an equal share.

I don't know anyone who this is true for. Of 100% of couples I know, the men do something, may not be a lot but a few nursery drop-offs, and a bit of housework etc.

Because doing something yourself is quicker than nagging a reluctant person to do it badly or forget it?

100%? The other parent never gets the child changed, takes them round the supermarket or cooks and feeds them a meal?

While I'm not surprised if 75% of women did more childcare/housework than their partners, I'd be gobsmacked if 75% of Dads do zero (unless the 75% of female respondents were single mums lol)

its true for my colleagues, my friends family members and for me too. I do 90% cooking in my house. but child care we do 50/50

DH does DIY, gardening and poopy nappies that are made when hes home, showers our 2yo, works in a supermarket so brings home any food shopping we need daily.
I do all night feeds for 5mo DS, but DH does all wake ups (still several times a night) for 2yo DS.
He will look after 5mo DS while I nap with 2yo DS if I've had a particularly bad night.
I do 95% of the household/child related tasks, but I'm a SAHM. Actually writing this list made me realise he does more than I thought because I originally typed he did nothing looks like we're both underappreciated.

Where did they get the stats from? No one asked me 😂

In my house my DH does about half. I work part time and he works full time, even if he's working a 12 hour day he gets up with DD to spend time with her and still insists on doing dishes when he gets home. If he's not in work he's more then happy to spend all day doing childcare and household tasks.
He wants to be that kind of dad

Pretty much true in my house. And the cause of so many arguments. I don't know how to solve it

Not sure what's your YABU, so I'm not voting.

I don't know anyone who does it all, but I know a few where the mothers do most of the care, yes. Still.

historysock

If he's not contributing, what is he doing there?

I'm the only adult in the house, my teenager does a few chores, so I probably do 97% of cooking, cleaning, washing, shopping etc. but there's no childcare.

That said as I also work full time my standards aren't the highest.

Well said Lweji

75% 25% in my house I think, but he works more... probably 65% 35%.

I do slightly more than him overall I would say, BUT all of the worrying/planning/organising/prioritising. Not sure how you really measure that!