Yet again. Please. Just say what your husband’s bloody hobby is.

[AliciaQuays]

Stop all this highly irritating coyness.

I sometimes think that all the whining and disapproval about hobbies is a form of internalised misogyny, tbh. Some posters genuinely seem to think that having no fucking life at all apart from work, chores and watching television is an indicator of maturity and moral superiority, particularly the ones whose partners are genuinely willing to allow them an equal amount of time for leisure activity - yet they are still kicking off because weekends and evenings should all be 'family time' ie dragging bored kids round some tourist attraction - or sitting indoors watching television only together.

My husband tends to get whim hobbies. Starts one at sounds good, gets all the expensive crap that goes with it then decides it's boring

It's caused some lovely discussions in the house.

Cycling is am entry drug for 'open water swimming' and all the hashtags

I’ve done a post under a different name about my partner’s hobby and everyone was like “it can’t be that outing!” It really is - under 30 people did it and most of them were married so if anyone from the hobby saw it (found it on google etc) it would be very easy to work out who I was by a process of elimination. So sometimes the hobby really is very niche - and I could have just lied and said cycling but then the advice (which was actually very helpful) wouldn’t have applied.

Definitely cycling. I see them on the roads and think, there goes some poor MNs husband.

You've done it now. Everytime I see one I shall laugh out loud!

My DHs hobby is giving oral sex.... Sometimes i have to outsource, hes great, it's great but ive got shit to do, i cant lay about being pleasured all day!

@WingBingo

I went passed a cyclist last night at 6.30 and thought “there he goes, avoiding bedtime”

Pahahaha

This is fantastic! My husband is a Mamil, and I'm into horses! We are living the dream But on the plus side, at least neither of us are serial killers. Which tbh, I would think of as more of a lifestyle choice than a hobby.

Mines birding. What pops into your head? Sad, obsessive, blokes in waterproofs.(true, generally) That's why we don't post about it.

ALemonyPea my ex was the same! Infuriating.

Present Mr Pear is into gardening which is great because I used to have a wilderness outside

@TheClitterati I changed to this NN because he deliberately read over my shoulder to find out my last one. Still miss it! Not him though!

@Frangible @nononever yeah... it's been said by friends! It ruled his life, in a way. He'd lecture me about how he must save money... but would buy designer ties and shirts either new or from Ebay (still adds up, they weren't going for peanuts), plus his £££ watch . If he'd had the money for this AND a life, it'd be ok but he didn't. He still lived at home citing student debt, despite being hours away from his reasonably well paid job and would break out in a cold sweat at the thought of staying at mine (way nearer) due to it messing up his suit routine/not being optimal for the clothes. I gave up.

Amazed at the number of people who've now admitted they found him nice initially but then a bit dull, or superficial or found the suit thing weird! It's done my self confidence good because I felt like he was the wonderful, colourful one but actually people found him prissy and a bit dull!

Surprised no one’s mentioned Craft Beer brewing yet - the absolute geekiness that goes into that! Balancing out the right kind of hops, matching different wheats, and i’ve never heard so much angst over yeast since my last bout of thrush.

I don’t understand the snobbishness about gaming. It’s no different to any other hobby, surely?

My cousin does martial arts, skiing, mountain biking, he’s super fit, built like a brick shithouse and really sociable. He also likes playing games. Surely it’s like any other hobby - everything in moderation? If your partner is ignoring his family responsibilities in favour of his hobby it doesn’t matter if it’s gaming, SCUBA diving, or football - he’s a twat.

(Interestingly, in my hobby club there are some men who are obsessed and ignore family time constantly in favour of getting more involved with the club - running trips, becoming instructors, getting on the committee etc. They then get the impression that they’re “invaluable” to the Club which would “fall apart without them”. Err, no, the club would happily potter along just fine, and I definitely judge them for prioritising their hobby over their family).

MsTSwift

I have to agree that prancing about a forest dressed as an elf is the least sexy thing I can think of.

It was even cringy when Orlando Bloom did it.

@ALemonyPea I'm rather like that, blame it on the ADHD. I'm on the lookout for my son behaving the same way. All those musical instruments which only got played for a few weeks. My poor mother. And husband. He still glares at me and says "that guitar" every time I suggest taking up something new.

In fairness to my DH his hobbies involve writing which is totally free and gaming which has a relatively low outlay compared to other things.

I spend hundreds (cough thousands cough) on supplies for mine and I play all his games too.

Tennis

Most mentioned are fairly 'normal'
There are some weird hobbies...

Trainspotting
aircraft spotting
LARP - Dressing up as elves, wizards, vikings, saxons etc (just as weird as cross-dressing imo but more acceptable)
embroidery/macrame type activities (what on earth do you do with them all)

Not weird but questionable
gambling (heavily)
drinking (regularly)
drugs

@Slapdasherie I think it sounds awesome. Just shows it takes all folks.

I find most men are improved by either a set of pointy ears or a dense and glorious beard.

My DH likes cycling (but not in lycra because he would feel stupid in it) and gaming. I like that he likes to game, it takes hours whoch leaves me with enough time to sew/paint/bake/read. I don't see why gaming is seen as childish but reading a fantasy book (likd harry potter) isnt.

Agree that men MUst have more than work and home. Same as us - there’s more to life.

We always were quite independent as a couple and had lots of our own interests etc. It’s good for you and your children to see.

ReanimatedSGB, so true

Family days out are only fun, about 3-4 times a year.

If every weekend has to be spent “as a family” it would drive me nuts

I think our generation have created such rods for our own backs, by constantly educating, stimulating and entertaining our kids that we then all need to escape this pressure through hobbies

ALemonyPea Are you married to my DP? He does this - it’s infuriating! I’m constantly tripping over useless old equipment. Luckily he’s sold a lot of it now - to fund his latest hobby

Does my head in as well because we met doing one particular hobby and now he doesn’t want to do it with me any more!!

Surprised no one’s mentioned Craft Beer brewing yet - the absolute geekiness that goes into that! Balancing out the right kind of hops, matching different wheats, and i’ve never heard so much angst over yeast since my last bout of thrush.

my husband is into craft beer but drinking it only, thankfully. We've got a cupboard full of CAMRA pint glasses from exhibitions or whatever you call them. .

So what @ReanimatedSGB said. Sitting on the sofa hand holding? No.

I can't say it really matters what the hobbies are. Most of the time people only want to know so they can mock.

Eg. people want it to be cycling so they can have the same old unpleasant bitching fest about MAMILS, telling cyclists to be off the roads and off the cycle paths, laugh about how they're not as physically fit as they were, make the same unoriginal comments about thinking they're not Bradley Wiggins, laugh about lycra because they know someone who goes to the shop in jeans, decide that because they cycle they must be selfish dickheads who hate family time and so on

I'm sure people would be annoyed if a bunch of men mocked a women's running club for wearing running tights because they're getting on and hardlyban attractive sight, tell them they're a controlling and avoiding their family duties because they've gone running two evenings a week, should stop thinking they're elite athletes by doing reps in the park etc. I'm not sure anyone on here would have an issue with a woman doing local events some weekends or parkrun followed by coffee and I'm fairly sure they'd deem any whining husband to be awful if he tried to stop her doing it

As ever, the hobby or sport is irrelevant. If someone is selfish then they're selfish regardless of their hobby. Equally if someone is a martyr who won't get themselves a hobby or have any downtime but what to bitch about their partner having one the they're going to be a martyr complaining regardless of the hobby.

And as for those talking about how sexy their cycling husband is - err... have you seen bib shorts? Instant fanny-shriveller.

Feel bad for those now being mocked for their LARP hobby now. My friend posted pictures on fb of him blacksmithing something and my first instinct was “Wow, that’s amazing, I wish I could have a ho at that!”