Bought my friend a cheap baby shower gift ...aibu ?

[sallyhoooo]

So it was my friends baby shower and I bought her some vests and bibs and a outfit (reduced for £15.99 to £5.99 in the sale )
She didn't know boy or girl so I wanted to wait till after the baby was born to buy nice outfits.
Anyway she said she didn't like what I bought and did I have the receipt so she could exchange.
I unfortunately didn't but she told me she took them back and the exchanged anyway
Now I feel so guilty that she knows I spent only £5.99
Aibu to feel crap here?
I've just spent another £30 on some more outfits now.

Why on earth do you feel crap? You bought her an appropriate gift - the cost is irrelevant. You weren't obliged to buy her anything at all. It wasn't particularly polite of her to tell you she was exchanging the gift, either - she should just have done this quietly, if she really, really couldn't bring herself to use what you had bought.

Tbh she was rather rude say she didnt like the item in the first why have you spent 30 quid on her !

Hold on - she didn't like a gift you got her for her baby? How entitled and grabby!! If she really didn't like them she could have re-gifted or donated them to charity. How is she to know that 5.99 was all you had in your purse and you chose to spend it on her?

What if she doesn't like the outfits you have just bought? Don't waste any more money on this 'friend'!

She was rude.The gift was appropriate for the occasion.

Maybe if she's got such exacting tastes then she needs to buy her own things instead of holding "give me presents" events where she's going to be ungrateful anyway

I wouldn't spend another£30. Take them back. It's not the job of friends to kit baby out in whatever styles and outfits mum/dad deem fashionable or cute enough.

I've kept the receipts this time.
I think the outfit was lovely but I guess we all have different tastes

How stuck up is she!? Ungrateful cow.
I got a couple of outfits for DD as gifts that I didn’t like, so she never wore them...end of.
She’s being silly re the vests and bibs.

What could be so offensive about some baby vests etc? Some people are so bloody rude! Please don't spend anymore money on her, you spent what you could afford and she should be grateful.

Besides, for all she knows you bought them for more but they would only exchange for the current, sale price, as she didn't have the receipt. More fool her.

'Shower-type gift' is shorthand for inexpensive and useful.

I don't think you did anything wrong, and the amount you originally spent was fine.

If anyone was rude, it was your friend, for making you uncomfortable about something g you were generous enough to give her.

How is she to know you didn't buy it full price? Either way don't worry about it - it doesn't matter how much you paid, you put some thought and time in and got a present, that's plenty x

but she doesn't know what price they were when you bought them? Presumably without a receipt they refunded her the price they are now (could be less than £5.99 if they've been reduced again), but there is no way for her to know that you didn't buy them when they were full price and that they were reduced after.

I think if she's rude enough to tell you she doesn't like what you brought her then your perceived rudeness of 'only' spending £5.99 is nothing compared to that! Most people would just smile and nod and just use those clothes for at-home days if they weren't fussed - they are going to get covered in sick and food anyway!

Spending £30 more on baby stuff is a bit mad tbh.

Cheeky cow. Sounds like a perfectly lovely and useful gift. I didn’t have a shower but was given some things I didn’t love when DD was born. I smiled and said a warm genuine thank you because they were kind and generous to get us anything!

You’ve done nothing wrong. Don’t give it a second thought. She’s a badly mannered princess.

She's incredibly rude to tell you she doesn't like them and ask for the receipt.

Don't worry about your behaviour at all. I wouldn't be buying her an additional gift either.

Rude madam! Take the thirty quid’s worth back for a refund, Madam doesn’t need or deserve anything else.

My god I’m constantly shocked at how rude people are when it comes to gifts. It’s as though there’s been a societal shift and politeness has gone out the window. I’d be damned if I’d gone on to spend another £30 on this friend!

I’d buy something for her baby once it’s born if you really want to buy a present. Or give the baby a cheque for their savings. She wasn’t grateful for the first gift. Why would you spend more to try to keep in her favours?

I didn't spend to keep in her good books I just thought the outfits were lovely and I like to spoil my friends children,it makes me happy (I know that sounds sad )

Your friend needs to learn some manners - the gifts are for the baby who is a separate individual from herself.

You put the baby in the outfit and take photos as they grow out of them in a blink of an eye.

We were incredibly fortunate to be given a lot of lovely gifts when our DC was born last year. At no point did myself or my wife even consider saying we didnt like something and can we return / exchange it. There are a number of things our DC never wore, mainly because she was given so much and they grow so fast, so we donated a number of items to those less fortunate.

One example.....we were given so many bibs and muslins at the time we thought we had too many.....needless to say within a couple of months all packets we open and all had been used!

I'm sorry OP but your friend is a CF.....a really big CF and incredibly ungrateful too boot.

Is returning baby gifts not the done thing?

I returned looooads of stuff after I had dd and people (very kindly and generously) gave us lots of pink frilly dresses etc which I knew wouldn’t get worn. I returned them and swapped for sleepsuits and vests etc which I knew she’d be wearing constantly.

I never let on to the people who gave them and sent them thank you cards, but was this very rude of me? I thought that it would be better swapping for stuff that would get actually get used is better than the original gift going to waste.

Wow. You have one very rude “friend”. Take the other outfits back, get your refund and spend it on yourself.

You'e not sad at all, sallyhoo, you've been kind and generous. I think your friend was very rude indeed.

She doesn't know it was £5.99 when you bought it because you didn't give her the receipt. She just knows that's what it was eventually reduced to, so that's what the exchange value was.

Also, what kind of ungrateful mare wants to change vest or bibs, ffs?

She'd never be getting another gift from me, ever.

@terriblecustomercervix I think it’s fine to return gifts if you know they won’t be used, but keep quiet about it. It would be really rude to tell the gift giver you just don’t like it. Depending how close you are to the recipient, I’d maybe say that you already have so much stuff in that size, would they mind if you exchange it for the same thing in a bigger size (and then, conveniently find that the shop ‘don’t have’ it in another size so get something different), but there are only certain people I would do this too. The majority of people, I would just thank them and then discreetly return and say no more about it.
Op, your friend is rude and I don’t think it matters that you spent £5.99 on a present. As you said, when the baby is born you were going to buy something else anyway. This is part of the reason I can’t be doing with baby showers, they are just another way to get a presenter out of your friends.