Aibu to deny all knowledge of vibrator?!

[Tedtalk]

So, here's the story!
Moved house 12 months ago and made friends with neighbour. We have coffee once a week but don't go out socially together. chat about everyday things and mainly household things, but nothing too deep.

I had my DS 12 weeks ago and she's been a great help. Last week she brought me round a bag of clothes from her own Ds - all in a big black bag and she told me to throw out anything I didn't want- said she hadn't been through the bag since packing it away when he outgrew the clothes and said, just give them all a wash and keep what you want. No problem so far..

Until I emptied the bag and amongst the piles of clothes there were 2 vibrators

No boxes or bags, just there in amongst the clothes...

Now, I'm not bothered about the vibrations per se... I just have no idea what to do now. My DH says I should just give them back, bold as brass but I'm in the camp of throwing out and pretending I never saw them (and hope that she never realises what's happened and never asks about them!!!) I don't feel that close to her to bring this up!!!

Advice??

I'd throw them out in case she deliberately put them in the bag to open a conversation.....which you probably don't want.

You'll never see your neighbour in the same way again.
:-)

If I was your neighbour, I would NOT want you to hand my sex toys back to me. I would rather you threw them away discreetly and left me ignorant that you had ever seen them.

But... they are expensive. Do you go round to her house sometimes? Could you smuggle them in and leave them somewhere discreet? Preferably somewhere her toddler DC might have put them?

Obviously this is a long shot and I hardly like to imagine the potential for this plan to go wrong......

I'd just say I'd found a couple of non clothing items in the bag & give them back wrapped up.

I seem to write off vibrators, I'd be quite pleased to get two working ones back!

Id put them on Ebay. Surely there is a market for used?

I'd be mortified as well though.

Alternatively: are you looking particularly sex-starved, OP?

Might your kind and sympathetic neighbour have suspected that you were actually IN NEED of a pre-loved vibrator or two, and taken this tactful opportunity to spread the joy?

I had a man come to do an energy performance survey on the house and I left mine on full view on the bedside table. I'd completely forgotten it was there. He was wandering around on his own and came back downstairs and didn't say a word about it. He couldn't possibly have missed it though as it was bright pink. Was mortified. Luckily I knew I'd never have to see him again!

This thread is making me laugh, love it. Purplepoop, Ambidexte, and Templetonstunafish... bravo. Just bravo.

😂😂😂

I would throw them out. But I love Igetknockeddownbutgetupagain's suggestion and think that is what you should do!

These stories are the reason I've never owned one.

As for what to do with them just put them in a bag and leave them in her house when you go round next.

@MitziK

And yes OP I would just put them in a carrier bag, and slip them to her with a “I’m not sure you meant to give me these”

This thread is apt! I was looking through my daughter's wardrobe yesterday, trying to find old clothes to give away and any new ones donated from friends and family she now fits into. Anyway, everything was mixed up and there were old clothes of mine in there too. Suddenly I find a pair of leather handcuffs from my 20's!! In the bag of kid's clothes! Do not remember stashing them there and haven't used them for years. I guess this could be the same scenario...

I seem to write off vibrators

Now that’s impressive. 🤣

@Templetonstunafish 😂😂😂😂😂 brilliant

@MrGsFancyNewVagina they just seem to break on me! Don't know what I'm doing obviously way too much wrong!

they just seem to break on me! Don't know what I'm doing obviously way too much wrong!

I have visions of you being told that you can’t get a refund for damages caused by wear and tear. 🤣

Ambidexte
.........................But... they are expensive. Do you go round to her house sometimes? Could you smuggle them in and leave them somewhere discreet? Preferably somewhere her toddler DC might have put them?
Obviously this is a long shot and I hardly like to imagine the potential for this plan to go wrong......

Am now picturing the OP breaking into the neighbours house in the middle of the night like The Milk Tray Man and getting caught brandishing 2 vibrators.

@Straycatblue

I think get a gift box and maybe place some chocolates on the top. Vibes underneath. Say it's for when she needs to relax.

Imagine if they aren't hers though....

straycatblue 😂😂😂

I am cringing at the thought of her maybe realising where she left them...then realising I have/had them!!

So it may come to her at 3am BUT as long as you don’t acknowledge them, she will be almost be able to pretend they were never in the bag and she must be mistaken. BIN THEM and never speak of them again.

Stop her having to put LOST posters up. Do a sister a solid.

😂😂😂 this thread is amazing

But... What if she was donated the clothes and never used them? Just shoving the bag somewhere before passing them onto you!
They might not even be her vibrators

I would give them back to her. They are expensive
.