to be shocked when i receive a letter/card addressed to MRS (DH'S NAME)?

[balancingact]

...this has happened to me twice! By this i mean it's addressed to Mrs Joe Bloggs, for example. These are both from friends - not ultra close ones, but good enough friends.
I keep thinking....what?!?! Haven't i gotten to the stage where i at least earned to be addressed by my own name? (i mean, i love hubby to bits, but even he thought it was a bit ridiculous!)

i wasn't really too annoyed (that's why i used the word -- AIBU to be "shocked" rather than annoyed....) and i know it wasn't done out of malice, i just didn't have them down as old-fashioned or extremely polite. My DH teased me all night about how i should scuttle off to the kitchen now and prepare his supper...

What is the etiquette to address two doctors?
Reminds me of Fawlty Towers!
I don't mind Mr & Mrs [DH initial] [our surname] as it's practical - he has one brother, a dad and two uncles, so there are 5 Mr [DH surname]s, but would really hate being called Mrs Hisname Hissurname! I sent a wedding card and a birthday card to a friend and called her by her DH's surname, later found out she hadn't changed her name In my defense, I had texted her to ask but didn't get a reply in time so had to assume!

It goes like this...

To Drs Blah and Blah.

I would like , just once!, to receive a correctly addressed piece of mail (we are two doctors too!). I'll probably drop down dead with shock should it ever happen (on anything besides mortgage related post where obviously they have to get it right)

Fawlty towers!
Genius!
I LOVE all of it but especially two doctors
(and , is this a piece of your brain?) ... ... Easy drifts off on tangent!

my MIL sends things to me as Mrs DH

which is quite annoying - our surnames aren't actually even the same anyway. I bite my lip.

and she always puts 'MA' after his name which drives him bonkers (but is rather sweetly proud really)

it's v.old fashioned etiquette from the days where the wife dealt with all the social correspondance. most people only do it now for wedding invitations (where's Cod, seem to remember that doing so makes her quite cross)

Am down with S&BIL who are always 'Dr Badger & Dr Weasel' (SIL kept own name),

but are PIL really 'Drs Badger & Badger'? (MIL got PhD after marriage)

ah sod it, shall continue to write 'John & Judy Badger, 20 The Burrow' etc

"Addressing a letter as the OP describes is in no way intended as an insult. If you don't like, don't do it yourself."

That misses the point. My MIL likes to be addressed by her husbands first name, so I address her that way. I figure this is the polite thing to do, even though I do not understand why she wants it done like this. On the other hand, I do not like being called by my husband's first name (which she is well-aware) but she continues to do it because she thinks it's right to do so. It's not an insult, but it's a bit rude.

Your family have some interesting names and addresses
Off on another tangent I keep getting reminded by DH that I promised to "love, honour and obey" - keep having to point out that the 'obey' bit isn't in the vows any more

'Mrs Wilhelmina Badger thanks Mrs Gwendolyn Weasel for her kind invitation to her knees-up on 5th July and will be delighted to attend'

daisythedof, I agree, if it's a mistake fair enough but if you know the other person doesn't like it, then it's rude!

am PMSL at the idea of Wayne Towers

lol at Wayne Kerr

obviously, as twentypence has previously pointed out, my MN name is in flagrant disregard of my hatred of being addressed as Mrs DH...

I find it highly offensive, I just wouldn't reply to such a letter. When the occasional letter like that has arrived it's always been from one of DP's friends or relatives, mine would know me better.

But, not being married, I don't get that sort of letter very often.

We are two doctors, letters just come to Dr X Fennel and Dr Y FennelsDP. It doesn't seem that tricky.

It's not really insulting is it? Insulting would be if they addressed it to Mrs FatUglyCow.

I don't like it either but it's only mildly sigh-inducing.

Is it always the done thing to put the male title first or is that getting dated too?

Should it be Mr & Rev (female vicar) and Dr & Prof (female prof)? Both of those sound better the other way around to me.

I usually get around this whole issue by addressing cards to e.g. 'the Badger family' but I guess once the young badgers leave home that won't do any more.

This thread is badger obsessed

It's not insulting or offensive (though I don't like it) to be addressed as Mrs Dh'sName Dh'sSurname... just ignorant, sexist and outdated. It annoys me marginally for... ooh... about 3 seconds, but mostly the people who do it are older people who were taught to do it that way. But I would never to it myself. Addressing a married woman I'd use her own initial + surname, addressing a married couple I'd put Mr and Mrs A. & B. Thingummy and addressing two PhDs/medics I'd put Dr A. and Dr B. Thingummy.

Well I would consider it not addressed to me, so it wouldn't be rude not to reply. If a letter were addressed to me, I'd reply.