Friend made my DH uncomfortable with flirting, don't know what to do.

[fortysevendogs]

We were visiting my friend for dinner last night, as they have just moved into a new house. I see my friend quite often but it's been a few years since we've all been together with our DH's and DC as usually I just meet my friend with our DC.

After dinner all of the kids were playing upstairs and the 4 of us were having a drink in the kitchen. Friend's DH went off to the loo and I went upstairs to see the DC as it sounded as if it was getting a bit wild up there. Left DH in there with friend, didn't think anything of it.

Kids ended up wanting me to play hide and seek with them for a bit, came down around 10 minutes later. Dh, friend and friend's DH were all in the kitchen together and we carried on with our drinks (I only had one as I was driving home).

We left around 9ish and after we got home and put the DC to bed, DH told me that when he was alone in the kitchen with my friend she kept smirking and winking at him, and also making some flirty comments. Now I've always had a feeling she has a crush on DH as in the past when we've been together at pubs etc she always stares at him, but it felt unfair to end the friendship over a suspicion and at the end of the day there's nothing wrong with her fancying DH as long as she doesn't pull anything! I mean, we've all had crushes we wouldn't actually go near, haven't we? Except this time it sounds like she wanted DH to reciporate. DH said he tried not to acknowledge it and just kept trying to make casual conversation. Apparently she snapped out of it as soon as her DH came back into the room. He said he was extremely uncomfortable.

Now the thing is, we're supposed to be spending a week together on holiday in October. I was looking forward to it as they are great company and our DC are the best of friends but now I'm not sure for obvious reasons. DH says it's up to me what to do. I do trust DH 100% but I don't want to put him in a position where he feels uncomfortable. And also now I obviously have bad feeling towards my friend. I have no idea how to handle this.

If I were in your situation, there is no way I would be going on holiday with them. I would be furious with her and would no longer be friends. If she wanted to know why, I would tell her.

She is no friend.

But it does still happen, and I think it's actually quite offensive to expect him to suck it up just because he's a man

Agree, this thread is disgusting.
If a woman had posted she would have been supported, instead this bloke has been disbelieved, told he’s making it up and is trying to isolate dp from her friends

I think he’s done everything right. He's told op what’s happened, it’s her friend so it’s up to her what happens next.
I couldn't go on holiday with them.
Im not sure about the friendship.

I'd call her and ask if she was drunk as hubby had told you she was acting weird and flirty

Ask if her marriage is ok and embarrass her

^this

I hate the term 'harmless flirting' when it involves another person's partner. No such thing.
Flirting is a means of testing the waters. Pure and simple.

@MrMeSeeks This has happened to me as a woman. It is not unusual for this to happen to women. Most of us know how to clearly shut any flirting down straight away. Its not hard to do. This is what the OPs DP should have done. If it persists, that is different. But usually it does not.

@thenested You don't deal with this by ignoring. You shut it down. Most people have the social skills to do this.

@jennymanara Maybe "ignoring" was the wrong word when the OP said "tried not to acknowledge".

Seriously, though, and I don't mean this in a combative way, but how would you shut it down in a socially acceptable way when it's your partner's friend not yours and any consequences/awkwardness will hurt them more than you? I'm genuinely asking here, not being argumentative.