To ask that only 1 parent per child accompany to bday party?

[SuzieQ10]

My DC's bday party is coming up. I'm planning to do the invitations and give out at school this week, she's starting reception. Inviting the whole class of 30 plus 8 cousins / family friends plus their parents.

Due to capacity we can only accommodate up to 80 guests maximum.

Is is very rude to ask that only 1 parent accompany each school child? I know not everyone will RSVP yes, but given it's the first reception class party I'm worried lots will bring 2 parents and we'll be over the venues limit.

Nobody is making him sit in the car unless they lock the car park?...

Think she means primary carer. I was always in that role but we still shared party attendance. No one wants to spend every weekend in a room full of other people’s kids and their parents, least of all the primary carer!

I do mean primary carer. I don't mind doing things with DS and other people's kids yet. He's two, so it's only really just starting. I'm sure next year when he's at school it will begin and we'll work out a fair system.

It doesn’t make me gasp, I’d just wonder why a grown adult really can’t think of anywhere better to go than sit in a car park for a couple of hours. Each to their own.

Nobody is making him sit in the car unless they lock the car park?...

Good God almighty, this place is hard work sometimes. Did you not read the rest of the post, where I said he'd probably abusively go to the gym. Or maybe do the big shop.

My Dad? Aah, He likes listening to the radio. He wouldn't offer if he couldn't/didn't want to. We do a lot together weekly anyway so sometimes it's is waiting for him, doing errands together etc. It's not a hardship for either of us.

Your posts are all over the fecking place! You said it “wouldn’t be fair to make him sit in the car”, then rip into people when they remark that nobody actually is making him do any such thing 🤦‍♀️

Then your entire initial post was completely irrelevant 😂

I haven't ripped into anyone Head

They usually are Barren

Tbf I wasn't really paying attention at the time it was something I was half reading whilst doing something else and minding the toddler. I wasn't expecting it to be so picked up on, that'll teach me eh

YANBU. My DS had his party on Sunday, their rules were 1 adult only per child (local wildlife reserve), any extra adults & children had to pay full entry and weren't allowed to join in with the activities I'd arranged &paid for the party duration

Totally agree, not a problem at all.

Actually (whisper this) DH and I used to (playfully) fight over who would accompany DS when he was that age group. I mean to see who HAD to go. The other one had a few hours to themselves so it was a hard fought battle! :)

These posts Are always interesting. It seems to depend on where you are in the country and the type of village/.town/city you’re from too as to the culture of parties.

The OP suggestion is totally reasonable but I’ve never considered exceeding a Hall size for a party. Very rare that all the children will attend and generally most bring 1 parent. Even adding in the extra siblings and extra parents who like to join I’d still not imagine you’d get to the 80 maximum.

Where we live it’s definitely parents stay in ks1 for most parties. The only exceptions were at someone’s house so less kids and also a couple that were at a small salon so limited space and less kids also. My daughter cried at the salon and i had to hang around for a while and sneaked our eventually but the venue meant we had to wander out and find a cafe to sit in as soon car to leave and go back. Generally parties on a village hall/community centre consist of the parents sat around the outside whilst the kids congregate in the middle with the host/entertainer etc.

As a single parent I’ve always gone alone from the adult point of view but I’ve always checked in advance if I can take the sibling as no where else for her to go - the ex usually works the weekends he doesn’t have them. Would be the same if he had them, I’d be busy. So someone has to have the sibling. I’ve never been told no. At soft play places we usually pay the sibling in ourselves - some places this means the can eat with the party group and other places not but that’s no issue. In places where it’s booked for certain numbers like clip and climb the sibling usually comes with iPad in tow and watches - and is often invited in when someone doesn’t turn up who has been paid for. We have a slight issue this weekend as my kids can’t see their dad as their half sibling has a party to attend and has been told strictly no siblings. The child’s mother can’t take her so he has to so he is not not seeing my children as the timing just won’t work. Not an issue for us but could be in some families.

I have been to a few parties where both parents turn up. It’s only usually a couple of sets though. Mostly the mum’s who take the kids and sit round chatting. If it’s dad’s they often ignore everyone.

I have chatted with work colleagues about this post and their ages vary from 30 to 50 and all agree that they would never accompany their children to a party!! It’s weird that a child gets invited and parents are expected to attend !! Sorry it’s the child’s party and the parents should invite how ever many children they can manage...grandparents and close friends can be helpers ! There was a post on MN from a mother who dreaded her child being invited to a party because she wasn’t part of the Mums clique!!

I admit to not reading all the comments.... But just come on to agree that it's perfectly reasonable to say that there's only room for one parent but maybe add "if you would like to stay with your child".

I'm another one who doesn't understand why parents (except for good friends of the birthday child's parents) stay at parties. We used to leave children from 4 onwards.

And to the person/people who said they'd be annoyed coz they'd have to make small talk with people they don't know - is an ideal time to get to know the parents of your child's new school friends - ok, you won't like all of them but some valuable friendships are made over these years - make the most of it.

Invite them to drop kids off & pick up if they want to 🤷🏻‍♀️ I'm sure some will jump at the opportunity OP!

It’s weird that a child gets invited and parents are expected to attend !!

Parents staying on the side are hardly attending a party, they don't join in the activity and seat down for a meal with the kids

I am glad it's considered extremely rude to drop and run here!