Asked to keep toddler quiet

[Jellytots321]

So I recently stayed in a holiday cottage attached to some other holiday cottages.

Unfortunaly the first morning we were there my toddler started to cut a tooth. He was crying on and off for about 30 minutes from about 7. We then left to go out for the day at 8am. Whilst on the way to our car I was approached by the owner and asked to keep the noise down. I explained the situation and she replied that I shouldn't have booked it I knew he would make noise (he was included on the booking and the site says children welcome). I left a bad review saying not to book if you have babies or toddlers as they will be expected not to cry. They replied with a smug reply saying thank you for responding to our request as there was no more disturbance for the rest of the trip (yeah his tooth came through so he stopped crying!). I apologised in my review for disturbance to other guests and suggested that instead of telling us to keep him quiet they could have asked if we needed any help. Someone else reviewed the day after saying that children are welcome you just need to be respectful of other guests. I was being respectful hence leaving at 8am and not 11am like planned. Aibu for leaving that review or feeling like I should be expected to magically stop a 1 year old from crying? I would understand if it was adults making noise but I was doing everything I could to comfort him!

If you book an adjoining cottage- you have to expect reasonable noise.

• babies crying
• kids noise
• people walking around

Unreasonable-
Loud music
Adults and kids screaming
Loud sex

@zzzzzzzz12345 hello 😊. I had tried all of the things you had suggested. And as she approached me on the first day she hadn't actually given me any chance to show I wasn't compassionate in general. I didn't take him outside until a reasonable hour (to the play park by cottages etc). He was asleep by 6pm every night and slept through. And I stayed out of the house every day from 8am until 5pm. So there was really nothing more I could have done to be compassionate 😊. It was just an unfortunate morning and I couldn't have gone for a walk in the pushchair as we were on a site by a main road so only place to walk was by other cottages. We left in the car as soon as we could but had to get things ready first!

Some people are idiots.

If you don't want to hear a baby cry (or there is a chance you might) then perhaps book into an "adult only" resort.

So your baby was cutting a tooth. You booked into a family friendly resort (or so you thought). In my opinion anyone that was annoyed with the disturbance (and it's not like your baby could help it) could have left or asked for a refund (like they'd get one 😁).

Next time someone asks you to keep the noise down just say "no can do I'm afraid, have a nice day" or "sure just get me some teething powders and a bottle of Calpol and I can see what I can do..." Start giving some attitude.

Seriously people are just mean sometimes.

I don't think there is anything wrong with him politely asking if there is anyway you could keep the noise down

What an utterly ridiculous thought.

There isn't a volume control button on babies.
If there was some magic way to keep a baby from crying don't you think someone would have discovered it by now after all these millions of years?

OK I have read the thread.

Thank you to everyone that's given your opinion. It's given me a lot insight!

I see a lot of people saying there is more to it. Honestly. If I was reading it I would think the same thing. Because why would the owner say that if there wasn't more to it?! I think that's why I was so shocked. Because it was the first morning after he had slept through the previous night and made no noise. We were quiet to and from the car. I could hear the neighbours so maybe the walls were really thin. I could also hear their dogs barking but I didn't say anything about that as the website stated dogs welcome 😜.

To everyone that has taken the time to offer comforting words. Thank you. I actually deleted my review before I wrote this post because I just felt so bad about the whole situation. I honestly felt like a terrible mother! And reading some of the comments on here has really warmed my heart.

Oh, to those calling me entitled. I want to reiterate from my previous comment that I didn't expect any help. My friend told me that when her son was crying the owner came and said is he OK? He sounds upset. Do you need some help? And I just thought it was a really lovely thing to say 😊.

Also, anyone assuming I did not care about disturbance. I care a lot. The whole situation was very negative and stressful. I have always received comments about how well behaved my son is and how happy he is. Its just unfortunate he was upset on this occasion and if I had a magic ball to see how the holiday would have started I probably would have avoided it!

Finally, to the comment saying it was more than 30 mins as I didn't leave until 8. He had stopped by 7:30, by that point we were already getting ready and I wasn't sure if he would start again, so I finished getting ready and left anyway 😊.

I think the whole situation just seems so strange and that is why people are trying to imagine what else could possibly have taken place in order for this to make sense. But really it just didn't make sense!

@retooth I find your name really ironic for this post 🤣🤣🤣🤣.

I agree. I just stated in my previous comment if they went about it differently I would have responded differently. But she said and I quote "I question the sensibility of booking if you knew he would make noise" and she did not say it with a smile on her face. More of a headteacher telling off a pupil. I'm surprised she didn't have her finger pointed at me.

"I question the sensibility of booking if you knew he would make noise

That sums it up.really. imagine a family friendly place where kids can't make a noise!
Ridiculous.

People being snotty about what help could’ve been offered. They could’ve checked if they needed a pharmacy and given directions.
And as for zzzzzzzz’s comment, well done you training your child to sleep in till 9.00. If you think that’s possible for every child your in dream land! I have a childcare qualification, lots of experience and children of my own, some kids are early risers whatever you do, just like some adults are!
I think the owners were arseholes and the review was fair enough.

If they welcome children they have to accept that children make noise! I think your review was fair and parents need to be warned. I wouldn't be happy staying somewhere where people complain about a baby crying.

Adults with autism should know that sometimes you can't shut up a child with autism. A meltdown is a meltdown. You can try to keep things as calm as possible...

We try to book detached/ end of terrace thick walled properties. No holiday park for us..

Thankfully our holiday neighbours were very understanding.

As are our actual neighbours.

@willow2017 afterwards I wish I replied "I question the sensibility of accepting a baby on the booking if you knew you wanted silence" but I was too taken back in the moment to think of anything cool 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣. I just came out with "yes it's stressful for us too when he cries" lame lol 😂

There is a company called Tots to Travel you could try next time. We stayed in one of their properties and the owner was so lovely, I reckon if she'd heard your baby she'd have given him a cuddle herself and told you to go back to bed!

@phineyj brilliant thank you will keep them in mind!

How was the rest of the holiday? Did it go well?

@duck90 well we avoided the cottage as much as possible as we were afraid to make any noise there at all. But we still had a good time 😊

I find people pick on easy targets. I obviously don't know if this would be the case for this particular owner, but people who would not challenge groups of adults screeching and talking loudly at night will happily pick on a parent with a baby or toddler crying at 7am. I also find some people like to put mothers (in particular) in what they imagine is their place.

The owner was being completely ridiculous.

That's a good point.

Ultimately OP, you clearly did the right thing in posting. Its useful information to put out there, and to everyone's benefit.

Hello Op. thanks for the update. If that’s genuinely all there is to it then clearly you are not being unreasonable. I do wonder whether at the end of the season they’ve just had enough, but that's certainly not your fault.

We all have tricky holidays with small ones for various reasons. It gets easier and better each year I promise.

Poor you ... my kids are all grown up now , but if they are ill there is nothing you can do .. this was probably stressing you out too ! ..

They shouldn't advertise as family friendly if they don't expect noise. You can't stop a 1 year old not to cry, especially when teething.

YANBU for leaving the review and you shouldn't have apologised, simply stated your case and I would have made a point of stating: I do not recommend this property for anyone with children as all children make noise. This renders this property not child friendly.

You let yourself down by suggesting they could have offered help: this type of comment really grinds my gears as it is no ones job but yours to deal with your children.

Parents need to stop posting that type of comment as it makes them look entitled.

@Goodlookingcreature by the sounds of it her child cried for 30 mins the whole time she was there, hardly unreasonable! If you go away in school holidays what can you expect. You sound like an idiot!

Rather silly to expect other holiday makers to ask if you wanted help... If I read that in a review I’d discount it immediately, I’m afraid, and assume you were just a bit highly strung 🤷🏻‍♀️