To start using my Dr title everywhere?

[Fyette]

I am 35 years old, but was born with the mixed genetic blessing of always looking far younger than my actual age. I still regularly get asked for ID in pubs and even at the cinema. I have a DD and people tend to assume I am a (very) young mother.

And yes, sometimes this is nice and flattering.

But like all women, and especially young women, I seem to get patronised a lot. I especially notice it at my DDs school (and before that with the HV), or in semi-formal settings.

I have a PhD and have never used my dr title outside of work, because I don't want to seem like a twat, basically. But sometimes I feel seeming like an obnoxious twat might be preferable to having to put up with this general condescension. Perhaps if I start introducing myself as Dr Fyette I will be taken more seriously? AIBU?

(Mind you: I do not think young women without a PhD deserve to be patronised any more than I do.)

Yikes. Going to be the lone voice here and say don’t. People who phd’s calling themselves Dr is just cringe. Many friends who have them, none of them use it. Even the medical doctors don’t as it’s such a brag!!

Don't worry, you're not a lone voice, there's loads of idiots who feel intimidated by other people's achievements like you on this thread

Medical or PhD?' To reply, 'No. Time Lord'

I'm not gonna lie, the night after my viva, I hit the pub and did variations on this. A lot. I'm not even ashamed, I was so bloody relieved, and I was being a massive Whovian geek.

I don't do it now. Obviously. Well, not sober anyway...

Do it.

The only place where people in large numbers think it's weird is Mumsnet, IMO.

Trying to keep Dr for work and Ms or whatever for home is quite tricky IMO - my cards have to have Dr to match bookings made through work, etc., so it's actively a pain to try to use both.

I’m a Dr. I earnt it and I use it as does everyone else I know who is a doctor or has a phD.

I think a PhD is more entitled to use the dr title than a medic. After all you have had to undertake years of original research to gain yours, a medic just follows a course of study!

As it happens, a medical doctor is only allowed to use the title Dr as a courtesy. PhD doctors are the only ‘true’ doctors. Also, a PhD is not necessarily work related. You are entitled to use it whenever you want, as you are no longer a Miss, Mrs or Mr when you obtain it, you are Dr in all contexts.

No don't.

We can all be proud of our achievements without being defined by them.

You wouldn't have someone introducing themselves as Nurse Smith despite them studying extremely hard for 3 years would you?

DH has a PhD in maths and has ‘Dr’ on his ID. This has worked and not worked for him.

Once when V Drunk he was caught by a police man urinating in the street (pre my influence) the police man was going to charge him but when he saw the ‘Dr’ he made a comment about hard working medics needing to let off steam and let him go... on another occasion he was stopped by police for running a red light on his bike and when he gave his details as Dr the policeman told him he should know better and fined him on the spot.

So use it wisely would be my advice!

Yep, do it. I’d also make my dh and dc call me dr if I had a phd. Seriously, you have put in a massive amount of work. Use your designated title since you’ve earned it (as a man probably would).

Having a PhD for nearly 35 years in bioscience and at that point using the title and my maiden name, I couldn't get a permanent job in my field, so joined the Civil Service fast stream.

On day one, I was told in no uncertain terms that I had to be Mrs...blah. Hand in glove with that I had to tolerate snide remarks about my qualifications.

Interestingly, I later came across others who were able to use their titles- but they were all men! Sexist or what...

Now, newly retired I use my title with gay abandon! It took blood sweat and tears to achieve, so why not. I bet that there are few men who even think about using their title or not...

I used Dr for 20 years (now Prof ). Not in social situations introducing myself of course, but whenever a title is requested on forms or on the phone. It's always felt an easier response than faffing around with Miss/Ms/Mrs - I hate their focus on marital status. Never occurred to me it was twattish, and now I'm too old to care!

If I had a title like Doctor i’d be writing it in my Christmas Cards.

To Mum

Merry Christmas

Dr Likethebattle phd

😂

My brother does have a PhD the clever sod.

You wouldn't have someone introducing themselves as Nurse Smith despite them studying extremely hard for 3 years would you?

No, because Nurse is not a title.

Don‘t. it makes no difference, people just think you are making it up and get even more patronising (i‘m mid 40s and look mid twenties.... i‘ve tried)

You have earned the right to use it.

You are entitiled to use it but I don't think most people are as impressed as you think they will be. The general public are only really impressed by a medical Dr.

My GP was very impressed - he said, “So you’re a proper doctor then?”

Use it!! I do! I worked incredibly hard for mine and I don't care if anyone thinks it's 'cringe'.

It won't make a difference I suspect, and will just mean people tell you their medical problems.

Do it.
You worked hard for it.
I love to see educated strong women with titles, I always remind DD how women fought hard to be in this position today.

Ha. When I get my PhD, even my family will have to call me Dr Stevie

You have a PhD. You shed blood, sweat and tears for it (I imagine). You're a Dr. Tell the world

Please do. You've worked hard for it as PPs have said. If you study for as many years as you have, go for it

With the kindest of intentions, qualifying as a nurse does not make you the intellectual equal of a PhD.

I think for women in particular it is important for achievements to be recognised. DD is about to start her PhD and I hope to hear her called DR Demented daughter at some point.
I work in a role which involves the military. I had to send a guest list of “VIP” guests to a very jumped up council official re a seating plan for a dinner. He responded to my email saying that “Colonel J will not be impressed with your typo. You have written “Stephen” as “Stephanie”
I replied, “Colonel J will be quite happy with Stephanie as that is HER name!”

I used to work with some twatty dentists that used Dr is every situation.... you actually are one!

My mum, now 86, qualified as an SRCN in 1955 at 21, which is now a degree equivalent

Use it! I do. It’s bloody hard work. I’m a Clinical Psychologist and so have a practitioner doctorate.
As to whether it looks twattish I think its great for women using this title for girls deciding on future careers.