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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Inappropriate request at Work - AIBU?

244 replies

GameChange123 · 15/08/2019 17:09

A colleague is leaving our team. Received an email from some colleagues about a collection - no problem.

I was surprised that they also asked colleagues in the team to provide a photo "au natural" to create a souvenir calendar for the person leaving. Apparently not showing anything rude but "you can show as much or as little skin as you want as long as we don't actually see anything rude and it's a bit 'cheeky'"

Shock

I find this grim on a number of levels and given there are 10+ people in the team there is going to be some pressure for everyone to participate.

I don't think it is appropriate and could really use the hive mind of Mumsnet to give me a steer on what to do/ how to respond to these CFrs.

AIBU?

OP posts:
managedmis · 15/08/2019 17:32

Do you usually wear boiler suits for work or something?

tomatostottie · 15/08/2019 17:32

Just send an email saying no, you won't be doing it. You think it's inappropriate. If they want to go ahead and others want to participate then that's up to them, but you won't be. End of discussion.

MashedSpud · 15/08/2019 17:33

Is the colleague the late Benny Hill?

I’d be running for the hills mate.

AguerosAngel · 15/08/2019 17:33

OMG!! What on Earth are they thinking?!?

Hell would freeze over before I’d be participating in this!!

Perunatop · 15/08/2019 17:33

Totally inappropriate in a work context, just decline politely.

BBBear · 15/08/2019 17:34

Imagine getting that as a leaving present! It would go straight in the bin (and be perfect for a Mumsnet thread).

cantkeepawayforever · 15/08/2019 17:34

If you don't want to send it to management yourself, you could reply to the senders along very similar lines - 'I know that you're only intending this as 'a bit of fun', but it could get tricky doing something like this in a work environment. Do you think it would be sensible to check with X (manager) and Y (HR) that they're happy with it from a company point of view, before going ahead?'

skybluee · 15/08/2019 17:34

I'd just do it fully clothed. That's natural too?

womaninthedark · 15/08/2019 17:35

'No.' is a complete sentence. So they say on MN. Personally, I prefer 'Fuck off' but your colleagues might not like it.

HeadintheiClouds · 15/08/2019 17:35

Who would want a piece of shit like this?

timshelthechoice · 15/08/2019 17:36

I'd report this type of request however high I could. It's beyond inappropriate.

Gazelda · 15/08/2019 17:39

Incredible!
I really hope you're going to bring this to the attention of someone you trust to deal with it appropriately.

madcatladyforever · 15/08/2019 17:39

Fuck me I wouldn't care if the entire office was doing it. The answer would always be no.

munemema · 15/08/2019 17:40

There's no way I'd participate but I'd also be really uncomfortable as the recipient.

Is it really possible that more than one person thinks this is OK? I work with people prone to spouting off about "PC gone mad" but I don't know anyone who'd want to get involved in this.

Knittedfairies · 15/08/2019 17:40

I didn't like some of my colleagues while they were wearing clothes; the thought of them without is just... just horrible.

ScreamingValenta · 15/08/2019 17:42

This is a modern thing .....people doing these sort of calendars.

Not really. There was a rash of them when 'Calendar Girls' came out about 15 years ago, but I thought the craze had died out long ago.

AcrossthePond55 · 15/08/2019 17:42

No fucking way. I can't believe that management would ever allow it.

But if I didn't want to make a stink I'd send them a picture of the Naked Maja .

Jemima232 · 15/08/2019 17:43

Well I'm just about to retire and I bloody hope you're not making the nudie calendar for me.

Since I'm a midwife I've seen all the fanjos I ever want to.

Namechangeforthiscancershit · 15/08/2019 17:43

Say WHAT?

Original poster
GameChange123 · 15/08/2019 17:44

I don't think the recipient would be offended by it (given what I know about that person) so I don't think it is to embarrass the recipient if you know what I mean.

I'm baffled - this team has been getting more inappropriate recently, like they are encouraging each other and egging each other on to see how far they can push it.

No to clarify we don't work in a low clothing industry!
It's an office environment.

OP posts:
BradTomby · 15/08/2019 17:46

I'd send them a pic of my hand 'au natural' with my middle finger stuck up at them.

Bloody crazy who ever came up with this idea.

EileenAlanna · 15/08/2019 17:46

Send them something like this for you pic, and be sure to cc to HR.

Inappropriate request at Work - AIBU?
HeadintheiClouds · 15/08/2019 17:46

They mightn’t be offended by it, but why the fuck would they want it?!

Merryoldgoat · 15/08/2019 17:47

This has cheered me up no end.

SynchroSwimmer · 15/08/2019 17:47

My pals and I would do it when we are in our naturist environment, but in the workplace, that’s just no.

What about “mutual respect” in the workplace and all those other things....

I like the earlier suggestions about “assuming it’s a joke”

Or, we, sometimes, on a sunny day, get the sun in the right direction, and create very witty “shadow” pictures on the ground, and take photos but only of the long shadows. Could be quite amusing....think yoga positions, rabbit ears and suchlike.....but that’s just me being naughty.