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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Inappropriate request at Work - AIBU?

244 replies

GameChange123 · 15/08/2019 17:09

A colleague is leaving our team. Received an email from some colleagues about a collection - no problem.

I was surprised that they also asked colleagues in the team to provide a photo "au natural" to create a souvenir calendar for the person leaving. Apparently not showing anything rude but "you can show as much or as little skin as you want as long as we don't actually see anything rude and it's a bit 'cheeky'"

Shock

I find this grim on a number of levels and given there are 10+ people in the team there is going to be some pressure for everyone to participate.

I don't think it is appropriate and could really use the hive mind of Mumsnet to give me a steer on what to do/ how to respond to these CFrs.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 15/08/2019 17:20

Is this for real? Who the fuck wants to send nude shots to s colleague. Where the hell do you work if it's real?

And tell to them to fuck off.

ScreamingValenta · 15/08/2019 17:20

Not on your nelly! They'd be getting a copy of the headshot I use on the online work directory.

If I were the leaver, I wouldn't exactly be overjoyed to receive a calendar showing my colleagues naked or scantily clad. Whatever happened to a giant card, a nice bottle of wine and a gift voucher? Confused

HappyHammy · 15/08/2019 17:21

i'd send a pic of my au naturale big toe, what a bizarre suggestion, what sort of workplace is it.

Verite1 · 15/08/2019 17:21

WTF. How can this ever be appropriate? Surely everyone will refuse?

Bluntness100 · 15/08/2019 17:22

Op. Does the woman who asked fancy the guy who is leaving?

EggysMom · 15/08/2019 17:22

Not. On. Your. Nelly.

HoneysuckIejasmine · 15/08/2019 17:23

Wtaf?!

Jemima232 · 15/08/2019 17:23

I suppose the other MN favourite (No Is A Complete Sentence) is as appropriate as the glue one.

Sexnotgender · 15/08/2019 17:24

That’s insane! What a ridiculous idea. HR will have a field day.

MindyStClaire · 15/08/2019 17:24

I'd be tempted to reply all "No I absolutely won't be doing that, and no one else should feel like they have to either", especially if you have more junior colleagues who may feel unable to resist the peer pressure. My last job was in a small company, and in that place I would've copied a manager and/or the HR lady.

Weebitawks · 15/08/2019 17:24

Who the fuck would want a naked calender of their ex colleagues ?

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 15/08/2019 17:25

Errr there is no pressure here, it’s a fuck off response from me!!!!

Jaxhog · 15/08/2019 17:25

Send them an almost naked picture of Shrek.

Seriously, this is inappropriate on so many levels.

GoGoGoGoGo · 15/08/2019 17:26

Why the fuck would anyone want a naked calendar of ex colleagues.

Jemima232 · 15/08/2019 17:26

Who the fuck would want a naked calender of their ex colleagues

President Trump?

Aquamarine1029 · 15/08/2019 17:27

I imagine some companies would sack a worker for even requesting something so grossly inappropriate such as this.

RatherBeRiding · 15/08/2019 17:28

Sod the "peer pressure" to participate. I'd not even bother to reply, just simply forward the email to HR.

TabbyMumz · 15/08/2019 17:28

Not sure why people are saying this really old fashioned? This is a modern thing .....people doing these sort of calendars..

Twickerhun · 15/08/2019 17:29

Please tell us you actually are the HR team.

catofdoom · 15/08/2019 17:29

Um. I genuinely speechless! How weird of her!!!

cantkeepawayforever · 15/08/2019 17:30

Who manages the team?

Might be worth sending them a copy of the e-mail, simply saying 'I'm not entirely sure that this is an appropriate request to everyone in a work environment - what do you think?'

Hopefully that will be enough to get it quietly stopped.

If manager thinks it's OK, then I'd send the same enquiry to HR.

Jemima232 · 15/08/2019 17:30

Not sure why people are saying this really old fashioned? This is a modern thing .....people doing these sort of calendars

Oh well that's all right then.

cherryblossomgin · 15/08/2019 17:30

I would be telling them to F off.

Missingstreetlife · 15/08/2019 17:32

Have they not thought the recipient might be embarrassed?

DrierThanANunsNasty · 15/08/2019 17:32

What the actual fuckity fuck?! I just don’t even have the words for how ridiculous this is...