To think if you can't keep your child quiet .....

[MozzchopsThirty]

Don't come to the pub and ruin it for all the other patrons

Two children behaving beautifully (or as lovely as toddlers can be) one clearly just being a brat

Just seeing young children eating turns my stomach so it sounds like pubs may not be for me

What do you do when it comes to feeding your child.
I don't think you would get very far wearing a blindfold

I think a few on here don't understand what family friendly means, it means family's are happily accepted doesn't mean it's the local soft play centre, it's still a pub.

I've seen well behaved kids in pubs who are happily interacting with their family, then there others who come out with kids let them run riot and get drunk.

The continent thing that gets dragged out everytime is a red herring, people don't mind kids in pubs restaurants it's the badly behaved ones they don't like.

There is much more brattish behaviour to witness from grown adults than kids in pubs. If you want to go somewhere where people of any age is behaving impeccably I don’t think that pubs are the environment for you.
If I go into a family pub before late then the worst you are going to see is a child being a child. Later than that and you get adults doing much worse.
Not really fair to pick on children when it comes to people’s behaviour in pubs.

I would never see it as soft play since I avoid that for a reason. Same goes for a family friendly pub.

On the 'foreign children are all angels and that's why they are nice to them in restaurants front' - in Southern Italy - the only place I know well enough to confidently comment - children are allowed to run around and behave (in my view) badly in restaurants to an extent I've rarely seen in the UK, and to do so well into the night. I was quite shocked by it at first - in my experience they also indulge children to a much greater extent than I see in the UK.

Personally, I think it massively depends where you are. Actually dangerous behaviour is never ok anywhere (eg running around the waitress's feet) but tolerance for noise is very context specific. Last weekend I was in a pub where an elderly couple were glaring every time the two children on the table next to me made a sound. They were also glaring at my 13 month old in some sort of anticipation, as he hadn't actually made a peep (unusual, admittedly!). It was a Wetherspoons at 11.30 on a Sunday lunchtime, and I thought they were being massively unreasonable. If you want to dine in a sophisticated hush there are loads of places to do that, but it might cost you more than £3.50 for your full English.

@Ilovemypantry yes I’m serious! I think it’s daft to be so intolerant of children.

Branding them brattish is making an on the spot judgement - an ordinarily well-behaved child might be disruptive for any reason. How is anyone to know? I don’t get annoyed by children testing parents. I would get annoyed at parents neglecting children - and that can happen anywhere - but not by the children themselves.

I didn’t have a problem with noisy children before I had my own and I still don’t.

The comment about French children during nicely chatting during a meal - most British children do that? My children chat at the table, sometimes they do colouring etc while they wait for the food. Most children I see out and about in cafes and restaurants are behaving perfectly reasonably, and the vast majority of places have good facilities for children (high chair, baby changes etc).

So I don't see how it's any different? Surely the vast majority of people are fine about the vast majority of children who are behaving in a perfectly acceptable way? But most people dislike bad behaviour.

I have lived in France, Spain, Italy and the UK. Kids are kids wherever they live. Some are well behaved, some aren’t. Some are well parented, some aren’t.

@SinkGirl its so horrible that you even have to feel nervous about being judged for something you cannot control. Please dont let other smallminded and judgemental people stop you from having some lunch in a pub.

I used to feel so judged if i was at my local pub having lunch with my friend and our babies and my baby started to cry. I then realised that this pub is a CHILD FRIENDLY/ FAMILY PUB! and also.. its normal for kids and babies to cry or misbehave sometimes. stop fucking judging people and go to a NONE CHILD FRIENDLY PUB

Surely the vast majority of people are fine about the vast majority of children who are behaving in a perfectly acceptable way? But most people dislike bad behaviour.

Yes, exactly.
However, as is evident from this thread, a small amount of people believe that their children can behave however they like and if you don’t like it you should stay at home.

just to make it clear im not talking about a child who is perfectly capable of behaving yet running round with a stick smacking other kids with it whilst people eat for example.. im talking about it just being one of those days when a young child is having a winge or a baby babbling loudly.

Well that escalated whilst I was skipping round the city

I take my dcs to pubs, have no issue with children in pubs
But I don't think anyone should have to listen to screaming
And it was brattish screaming
I see parents like this day in day out, they think parenting just happens, your child will raise itself, no need to intervene, install boundaries or consequences for behaviour

Fucking idiots!

I think all of us really know that "micro-managing" the behaviour of infants is impossible-even if we are perfect parents, and we have perfect children-there must be some families like that somewhere.
It is a question of where. A "Family-Friendly" Pub is fair game. I myself would always go to a "Family Unfriendly" Pub.
I once was with my wife and three your old son at Wentworth Golf Course, to see Seve Ballesteros Tee Off, from a few feet away. (Never mind how that happened-I probably had no right to be there).
It was completely silent. My hand hovered over the poor child's mouth the whole time. It was the most stressful three minutes I have ever had.

There's only one cunt in this thread and it isn't the eighteen month old baby crying

I'd rather a be a cunt than completely shit at comprehension.

I will keep my kids quiet in public, when adults are. So never.

I wasn't the only person who misread you Gibbon. There was another pp wondering wtf they'd just read quoting you and someone else said they were shocked until reading it again so I've re read it and I can see my mistake and I apologise. First time I read it I thought the "they're all horrendous" was meaning children but I see now you were comparing those words to brat, which in comparison isn't horrendous.

I apologise for getting it wrong and for calling you a cunt and I genuinely mean that.

Surely the vast majority of people are fine about the vast majority of children who are behaving in a perfectly acceptable way? But most people dislike bad behaviour.

Yes, exactly.
However, as is evident from this thread, a small amount of people believe that their children can behave however they like and if you don’t like it you should stay at home.

Exactly! Some people seem to think that normal behaviour is bad behaviour, that running around being noisy and disruptive is normal and the issue is with anyone who says otherwise.

Meanwhile most sensible people have zero issue with well behaved childten and know children can be unpredictable and misbehave but think parents should parent their offspring instead of ignoring it.

As ever, it's always the loud and rude minority.

@snitzelvoncrumb you are exactly the kind of parent this thread is pointing at

Those non parenters who don't feel the need to tell their little darlings to behave or be quiet or ...... shock horror ...... the word no

Assholes

it's always such a culture shock to come home again and experience how hostile some grown adults can be towards little children

What gets me is the looks you get from some people, or even loud, pointed comments, when you come to sit near them with children. Even now, sometimes, and mine are 14 and 10! Mine were never badly behaved - just wriggly as toddlers, but then we ate out infrequently, in family friendly places with other small children, always early evening or in the daytime, took lots of distractions, went for place with or near playgrounds so they could tire themselves out until the food came. Some people just object to children being in their presence for any reason and just enjoy a good moan. Well, good, I hope their piles hurt, the fat, old, miserable bastards.

Though having said that, some of the worse people to be around with their children are not chavs in a pub but entitled rah rah upper middle class Tory types. They seem to think everyone wants to hear their loud, boring voices, holding forth - both them and their children. Not so much badly behaved but seem to fill the entire space and get in the way (not that they ever would imagine they could be in the way, they are so entitled) wherever they are with their braying and physical presence, just quite anti-social and it's probably best if they stay in their large homes most of the time to make as much noise and take up as much space as they like and are not let out in public.

Yes, apologies I misread @GibbonLover’s post too

Although do think it is pretty mean to call a child a brat

These threads always go the same way.

OP: Badly behaved children, so annoying!
Poster 1: How dare you, not all children can be controlled, they are only children!
Poster 2: You obviously glare at any child who breathes near you!
Poster 3: No no, we're only talking about parents who let their children behave exactly as they want to-
Poster 4: Everyone in the UK is so intolerant!
Poster 5: Actually my child is allowed to behave exactly how they want to because I find everything they do hilarious.
OP: This is what I'm talking about! Poster 5!!!
Poster 6: You're saying I can't even leave the house again?! :(
Poster 7: You should stay at home if you can't tolerate seeing a baby!

Sigh.

I don’t think children should be allowed in pubs. Not just for the noise factor but I don’t think alcohol should be normalised as something everyone does.

The venue is irrelevant though, be it a restaurant, school concert, theatre etc some people just don’t seem to care others enjoyment is ruined as long as they get to do what they want to do.

We often go for a pub lunch with our DS. Last time, a fellow patron was chasing him around the pub, it was hilarious.

It wasn't though, was it? It was annoying for the other customers and, more importantly, dangerous for the staff and your child.

I can't believe I have to spell this out to you, but: pubs are places where people are carrying drinks in glass containers and heavy plates of hot food. Your child should absolutely not be running anywhere in a pub, ever. I worked in pubs for a few years and I have seen two accidents involving small children running around, both of which resulted in someone going to A&E (in one case a staff member who was badly cut by broken glasses when she tripped over an out of control toddler, and in the other case a child of about four who ended up getting scalded on the scalp and face by hot soup when he ran into a bar man who was bringing food to someone's table).