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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have screamed down the phone at wrong information?

340 replies

SnotBlower · 14/08/2019 14:41

Last week I told my mother that DDog had worms. She spoke with her “know it all but knows incorrectly” husband and then rang me back telling me “Barry was saying, you need to get the queen out”. I said “what?” And she said “the queen worm, Barry was saying that there is always a queen and it’s a long white worm and until you get that one, you’ll never get rid of the babies”. Now ... I’m used to Barry’s bullshit ridiculous advice and I’m also used to my mum blindly believing everything he says and refusing the accept that he’s wrong, so to avoid the argument I just said “ok”.

A couple of days later she asked “did you manage to get the queen yet?”. Now ... catching me on a bad day I snapped “it doesn’t work like that with worms! There is no queen or worker worms or bloody soldier worms ... they’re all the same!” So she, as predicted said “no! Barry used to have a dog so he knows what he’s on about!! You need to get the queen worm out otherwise it’s no good, you’ll never be rid of them”. So I changed the subjected.

This morning she rang up and said “hows the worms?” So I said “good, all gone now” so she said “oh good! You must have got the queen then! Barry was saying it’s called the Tate worm or something ... “

So at this point I lost it and screamed down the phone. She started shouting “what’s wrong?!” Thinking I was being attacked and now she’s in a huff because I “worried her”.

This drives me mad, Barry comes out with the most ridiculous shit and she instantly decides he must be spot on and argues everyone else down - in turn making herself look as daft as him!!! It’s gone on for over 20 years and I’ve always tried to be polite and humour them but fuck it! AIBU to not go along with this shit anymore? He needs to be told!!

OP posts:
HisBetterHalf · 14/08/2019 17:33

bARRY bULLSHITTER

DontBeOffensive · 14/08/2019 17:37

Already I can declare that this thread belongs in classics.

I second the request for Barry's view on Brexit!

NeverSayFreelance · 14/08/2019 17:40

Tbf this sounds familiar to me and you do get to a point where you just snap. Is it reasonable? No. Expected? Kind of.

Also who the hell is Barry and why does he know so much (or not) about stuff?😂

Bezalelle · 14/08/2019 17:40

QUEEN WORM!

< runs away gibbering >

madja · 14/08/2019 17:42

Ha ha! This is awesome 😄
(My husband's family are all Barry)

Zaphodsotherhead · 14/08/2019 17:45

I asked my dog if she missed being a mother.

She side-eyed Mumsnet and curled her lip. You can tell Barry I said so.

cheesewitheverything · 14/08/2019 17:48

I love this thread. I have known a lot of Barrys over the years but I really thought that Google would have done away with them. So pleased to hear this one is going strong!

Caaarrrl · 14/08/2019 17:49

Can you ask Barry if my male dog will forever long to have been a father but I was a cruel, heartless owner and had him neutered? I'm really worried about this now.

KisstheTeapot14 · 14/08/2019 18:03

One of my DH's friends is a Barry.

He doesn't wait for a question, he just comes out with bullshit. And he talks a lot.

On hols recently he asked if anyone knew how weight is lost from the body? We could all tell he knew the secret answer.

Brushing aside unscientific answers such as using up more calories than one consumes, he patiently and triumphantly explained that the body's main way of releasing excess fat is that it is converted to Carbon dioxide and is exhaled.

My friend and I looked at one another - she suggested we all hyperventilate to explore this theory. It could be revolutionary.

THE CO2 diet plan

theWarOnPeace · 14/08/2019 18:09

I kind of thought you were unreasonable for screaming, but through sound argument you have changed my mind.

I have snapped once or twice over my mum’s bff fucking Jackie. AKA the oracle of life. Except she’s a bit dim and my mum laps her crap up, despite me repeatedly telling her that if it’s Jackie’s opinion then please don’t repeat it to me.

Every other sentence starts with what Jackie thinks on a subject. Everything, from biscuits “she’s not lactose intolerant, Jackie, but she really just cannot have a biscuit with chocolate”, err ok! “Jackie tried going to that country on holiday once, but ended up not going in the end, she says you won’t like it” erm, any reason? “Jackie said you really shouldn’t give the kids antibiotics as it totally destroys their immune system”, what for whooping cough? Just not give them antibiotics? Arrghhhh fuck off! Even now I feel shouty.

My son had a tongue-tie (and my mum tells J everything within 30 seconds of me telling her), so I immediately get a barrage of shit advice. He was struggling to breastfeed, obviously because of this tongue-tie. Wise old Jackie said I should get him some bottles/formula and crumble up Rusks in them because he won’t have been getting enough so needs feeding back up. Also put cabbage leaves on my boobs.... no you twit, that’s for mastitis or engorged breasts! Or alternative to the previously thick suggestions, like poke my tongue out at him, and surely he will copy me, then he’ll stick his tongue out and eventually stretch out the tongue-tie. Bosh! Job done! Bearing in mind, he was about 48 hours old and had barely opened his eyes at this stage.

When my other son was diagnosed with autism, I specifically told my mum under no circumstances was she to tell me what Jackie’s opinion on the subject was. Got a text starting off with “I know you said you don’t want to hear it because you’re in denial about the diagnosis, but Jackie said....” cue the fact that I’m probably depressed and in denial - despite me pushing for diagnosis and actually being fine with it. There’s a camp in America I should send him to, they come out cured. Ok, my 3 year old yeah, in a fucking camp in bloody Arizona or Ohio or wherever the hell it was. Also I really ought to just carry on as I am and not indulge him, otherwise he’ll play me up and become a brat because I won’t be able to tell the difference between bad behaviour and autism. My mum laps all this advice up and says that Jackie knows her stuff because she worked with a woman in the 80s who had a son with schizophrenia. How that relates to me, I have no idea!

One day I just flipped and said I will not hear one more fucking word about fucking Jackie and her fucking idiotic streams of barely consciousness! My mum said “Jackie said you are very closed minded and selfish so I’m not surprised you’ve gone off on one about someone else actually having opinions”.

absofuckinglutley · 14/08/2019 18:15

Omg is Barry my husband?? Am I your mum?! Grin

MitziK · 14/08/2019 18:36

Thread title - Barry Batshit and the Tate Worm Queen.

madja · 14/08/2019 19:02

theWarOnPeace
Sounds like Jackie and Barry would make a perfect couple!
Hopefully they would talk so much bullshit to each other their heads would explode😁

glueandstick · 14/08/2019 19:09

Oh god. My mother is like this. Only she doesn’t really listen and then gives advice on things she thinks she’s heard with anecdotes of stuff she hasn’t heard at all. 😂

MrsTommyBanks · 14/08/2019 19:15

I used to work with a female Barry called Doreen. Many years ago but I can remember crying down the phone to my then DP with the absolute frustration.

Haggisfish · 14/08/2019 19:16

Omfg yanbu. My mum went out with someone like this once-utterly convinced he was right about everything and he really really wasn’t.

mumwon · 14/08/2019 19:29

todays topics include scabies & worms (off subject) is anyone else feeling grossed out & itchy???

Summerunderway · 14/08/2019 19:40

Am just about to read ds his bedtime story.
Barry the fish with fingers!
It's great!! No advice given but he plays the piano!

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 14/08/2019 19:43

I think every family has one.
Our is called Mike...

Mike knows everything... But mostly wrongly
.. Most of the time... I smile indulgently..
Not so when he hands out medical advice....

Mike is stupid.

And dangerous.... His mum was a lot worse as he refused to call an ambulance as she was 'attention seeking'.
Mother had actually had a massive stroke...

Despite this Mike still gives advice... He is so dim he hasn't learnt.

His medical knowledge comes not from his medical training or nurse training or anything vaguely medical.

It comes from close perusal of the DM and his experience as a caretaker....

Idiot...

I know preface any response to latest family disaster... Has Mike been giving advice again??

FireBloodAndIce · 14/08/2019 20:00

I'd love to know Barry's opinion on pregnancy haemarroids, how to get rid of the fuckers when no meds work.

I once knew a Barry, would not accept when she was wrong, ever. I told her i was going to a restaurant with dp (our fav) she insisted meals were extortionate- 30 quid per dish! Refused to listen to me and got the hump when i googled the menu to show her!

YourSarcasmIsDripping · 14/08/2019 20:14

@FireBloodAndIce you need to get rid of the queen haemorrhoid of course!!!

JesusInTheCabbageVan · 14/08/2019 20:14

Please ask Barry how he thinks we can solve the climate crisis!

TheSingingTowers · 14/08/2019 20:23

My DAunt is a Barry! Everyone knows though and just indulges her!!

Rainbowknickers · 14/08/2019 20:34

Hahaha my fella works with a ‘barry’ (real name Ryan)
But my bloke calls him Barry!
(As in Barry bullshit)
This thread has made me howl

MaybeitsMaybelline · 14/08/2019 20:36

Sorry but i am pmsl laugh ting at the Tate worm