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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

If you won the Euromillions, would you stay or go?

177 replies

Sundancer77 · 10/08/2019 11:11

Carrying on a Whatsapp discussion from last night with 5 old school friends..all said if they won the lottery or came into a lot of money for example, they’d leave their dp/dh.
It’s come to light to me recently that many many people I know are V unhappy in their relationships and would deep down prefer to be out of it but finances, complications in life, the thought of raising their children alone etc..makes them stay put. On the outside, everything looks great in their lives..it got me thinking ‘Is anybody really happy in their marriage?’ Is it such a rarity? If you had a windfall and were able to make your life a lot easier etc, would you be alone?
I’m also shocked at how people I assumed were happy and look like they have a great life..really don’t.

OP posts:

Alsohuman · 10/08/2019 11:37

Absolutely stay. And enjoy the retirement of our dreams.

Crimebustersofthesea · 10/08/2019 11:39

Stay, but I'd be financially better off single anyway so I suppose I'm in a different situation. Very sad that people feel trapped by finances

PolkadotLollipop · 10/08/2019 11:41

Stay, probably. Unless the money amplified our worst qualities to the point where we were no longer compatible.

DisgruntledGuineaPig · 10/08/2019 11:44

Oh god stay with DH, I love him, he's fab - we would probably argue lots about what sort of 'dream house' we'd buy, we have different tastes. Both would want to stay in this town though, probably within 2 miles of this house - I opened this thread expecting it to be if you'd stay in your current town/area or not!!!

Sadly, I do know that other couple are just together for managing the family and lack of other options. Even more sadly, when we were all in our late 20s (now 40s), and first getting married, buying houses and planning DCs etc, there were a few you could see weren't particularly well matched/in love, but they wanted the settled down with kids lifestyle (both male and female) and just got on with it with the person who was happy to do that with them.

I know I'm lucky I never had to make the choice.

timeforawine · 10/08/2019 11:45

Stay. Would leave the country though for warmer climes

WhatWouldTheDoctorDo · 10/08/2019 11:45

Stay. We've had a few woes over the years, it'd be nice to live a little with zero financial concerns. We often have 'if we won the euro millions' conversations though admittedly only buy a ticket once or twice a year!

iklboo · 10/08/2019 11:45

Definitely stay. There's so much we want to do together (with DS).

Hoppinggreen · 10/08/2019 11:53

We would want to stay together but unfortunately I think we would see less of each other as DH has a dream it would allow him to do and I really wouldn’t want to do it ( sail around the world).
I suppose we could try and find a compromise

Disfordarkchocolate · 10/08/2019 11:54

Stay. We would love to spend more time together having fun.

Andromeida59 · 10/08/2019 11:57

Of course I'd stay. I'd buy him a recording studio for his music.

MRex · 10/08/2019 12:07

Oh how sad, I thought this would be about traveling abroad. Yes we'd stay together. DH would love to spend winters in the Gold Coast or in California and I wouldn't mind that for a couple of years. I would retire mostly (hard to retire completely) but we might invest in DH career rather than him immediately retiring. I would be tempted to have another baby because I wouldn't have to go back to work so there wouldn't be compromises.

Beamur · 10/08/2019 12:09

I would stay but would also fund DH to spend more time doing his activities, which would make him happy although I would see less of him

Jsmith99 · 10/08/2019 12:09

Stay, retire, travel.

Together.

Chillisauceboss · 10/08/2019 12:13

Definitely stay!! Any tensions we ever feel probably root in money - having to work full time, being exhausted at the end of the week. To take money stress out of our lives would make our fantastic relationship even better!

PurBal · 10/08/2019 12:14

Woah what?!? No!

StaplesCorner · 10/08/2019 12:15

I'm on a few threads on the Divorce board so I know a lot of people would run like the wind! But a friend of mine who from the outside has an appalling relationship recently came into around £1million and she stayed, she loves him whatever.

Sparadrap · 10/08/2019 12:16

Stay 100% I love my life with him rich or poor. Cheesy but true.

Tennesseewhiskey · 10/08/2019 12:16

I have an unusual situation.

Me and my best friend always share any winnings. So I would absolutely stay and share with her.

Her brother is my dp. But she comes first in cases of sharing the money. Dp is aware of this and always says he would give me half if he wins. Though he knows he wouldnt get half of mine.

Not sure of me and dp would stay together. He is adamant that he would want to move abroad. I wouldnt. I would want to be near best friend and her mum. They are my family and I wouldnt uproot my soon who has HFA.

If I won, I would give dp the money to be able to move abroad. If he wanted to go. I would wish him luck, tell him I love him and to go fulfill his wish. I wouldnt go.

I would rather he was able to follow that dream than stay here with me when he dreams of living abroad. We dont have kids together or anything.

I love him that much, I would love to be able to give him that. If he chose to stay with me, that would be my preferred situation.

But as much as I would miss him. I wouldn't want him to stay, just for me, if he has the means to move abroad and that's what would make him happiest.

PooWillyBumBum · 10/08/2019 12:16

Stay. The best part about it would be him not having to work like he does (although a small part of me suspects he would anyway!)

Pricedrop · 10/08/2019 12:18

I think alot of people wouldn't ADMIT that they would leave. It's quite a painful thing to think about isn't it, as in reality you AREN'T going to win millions.

I left my DH when we were both broke. Weirdly, if I won millions, I would consider getting back with him. Would at least help him out financially. Financial strain had alot to do with the ending of our relationship

Crunchymum · 10/08/2019 12:18

Stay but buy a house big enough he can have his own wing

firawla · 10/08/2019 12:19

Definitely stay!! Didn’t even occur to me this question was going to be leaving your dh, I presumed it’ll be leaving your job, or leaving the uk

Jurassicmuma · 10/08/2019 12:21

In honesty I think a huge huge win would split us up. I'd want to be off travelling the world and I'd never want to work again whereas he'd want to buy a big farm and shooting estate and while he'd employ lots of people he'd want to work also. I just don't think we'd want the same thing if we could afford not to work and he wouldn't be happy with me not being at home all the time

FookMeFookYou · 10/08/2019 12:21

I'd leave the UK absolutely but with my DH and kids, live as remotely as possible but not to the point of making our lives difficult.

scaryteacher · 10/08/2019 12:22

Stay, and travel a lot without worrying about budgets.

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