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AIBU?

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Original poster

To expect parents to teach their little children not to approach my dog?

412 replies

joystir59 · 08/08/2019 20:33

It happens all the time- young child screams "Little doggie" and reaches towards Dog with outstretched hands. My dog hates little children doing this and would probably snap at them if they managed to actually get their hands on him. Why don't parents teach their children to ignore strange dogs?

OP posts:
animalprintfree · 08/08/2019 20:39

YANBU I taught my son to ask from the age of 2. From the reactions he gets, I gather his asking politely isn't the norm.

Your dog doesn't sound very nice...

Stampy84 · 08/08/2019 20:39

Absolutely no idea!!! Even as an adult I always ask the owner before I stroke a dog, never ever would I allow my child to just go and approach a dog!

Stampy84 · 08/08/2019 20:40

@animalprintfree what reaction does he get for asking?

plantwhisperer · 08/08/2019 20:40

@animalprintfree That's rude. Some dogs can be lovely but get nervous around loud, grabby children. My spaniel pup is lovely but hates when kids try to steal his ball to throw for him!

my2bundles · 08/08/2019 20:41

If dog owners are going to take their dog around small children they need to teach them how to behave around small children.

FrappeLatte · 08/08/2019 20:42

Your dog doesn’t sound very nice and, if it’s likely to snap, should be wearing a muzzle. Very young children are unpredictable and don’t understand the dangers of unpredictable animals.

Soubriquet · 08/08/2019 20:42

One of my dogs adores children. Luckily she’s the one kids always want to pet (she’s a 2kg chi so very cute and tiny)

The other doesn’t like being petted by strangers.

I won’t allow anyone to touch my dogs unless they ask first. Especially children.

I know they won’t harm anyone, big girl just gets out of the way and little girl shoves herself in front of her to be petted, but I do it to try and teach others

I don’t allow my children to pet other dogs without asking either

cadburyegg · 08/08/2019 20:42

YANBU that being said my children have never approached dogs and I am sick of dogs running up and jumping at them

Quaffy · 08/08/2019 20:42

It’s reasonable to expect them to stop their child approaching your dog but you can’t expect them to stop the child shouting “doggy” and reaching out

MissYeti · 08/08/2019 20:43

15 month old DS waves at dogs at the moment (we have one at home so he's very much used to being around dogs) but even so when he's older I'll teach him to ask first - for his own safety as well as the dog's wellbeing. YANBU.

Ineedaweeinpeace · 08/08/2019 20:45

How dare they be excited by your dog. Fucking children.

CharminglyGawky · 08/08/2019 20:45

I don't know, it's a simple and very important rule.

It's hard to teach though, every time I stop my 2 year old mid dash towards doggie while explaining that you mustn't ever approach an unknown dog without asking the owner first I get interrupted by said owners breezing in talking over me about how it's 'fine' and the dog is 'friendly' which is lovely and friendly and DS loves meeting the dogs but it spoils the lesson a bit! Especially as we have the soppiest and most patient dog in the world at home so it's hard to get him to understand that not all dogs are like that!

thesnapandfartisinfallible · 08/08/2019 20:45

Both of mine love kids and would just present their bellies for fussing but our neighbours doesn't. Kids freak him out and he'd probably bite if they ambushed him. Parents need to teach their kids to ask or just not touch a dog they don't know.

Not all animals have to be child friendly.

Hoppinggreen · 08/08/2019 20:47

My dc understood from a very early age not to touch a dog without the owners permission and not to approach a dog which didn’t have a person with it
However, I have had to peel small children off my GR several times. He’s pretty good but large and clumsy and like and dog if he was scared or hurt he could react ( very unlikely, he would try and run away)
Also, my dog doesn’t get near small children as he likes to lick them and not everyone appreciates it

Greensleeves · 08/08/2019 20:47

Of course parents should be teaching their children not to approach your dog. Their children, however, should be safe even if they do disobey their parents and approach (as children do). If your mutt snapped at my very young child, you and it would be very sorry indeed. Don't take it near other people if you can't trust it not to hurt them.

AmIRightOrAMeringue · 08/08/2019 20:47

I totally agree with you and try and teach my two that some dogs dont like being touched and to ask their owner first.

But they are young children and no matter how many times I remind them, I think it needs to be appreciated that very young children are unpredictable and impulsive. Therefore if dogs are not good with small children the owners should be aware of this and also try and keep them away.

The same way I teach my kids to cross the road safely. But I dont 100pc trust them or other kids not to run into the road occasionally if they see something or someone on the other side. So most drivers are more careful if they see young kids by the side of the road

CycleWoman · 08/08/2019 20:47

I do not have the answer to this bus I wish I did. My dog is routinely approached by kids (she is very cute and appealing to kids!). But often they scream, jump up and down near her, grab at her, or put their faces in hers. She does not enjoy it at all and I often have to explain to this kids nicely that not all dogs like to be approached in this way and it’s best to ask first etc etc.

I don’t let my own kid approach dogs he doesn’t know. Dogs, like kids, are unpredictable.

JanewaysBun · 08/08/2019 20:48

Yanbu DS is only small but my mum never let us touch any dogs we didn't know so I'll follow the same.

Soubriquet · 08/08/2019 20:48

How dare they be excited by your dog. Fucking children

By all means be excited. But teach your child to ask first!

Children grow up to be adults and adults can be idiots...

For example when a man plonked his barely walking toddler in front of mine and my nans dogs and walked away for a fag.

He was so bloody lucky that my nans dog was a saint.

Mine would have nipped because he was old and had pains occasionally

Twickerhun · 08/08/2019 20:49

If your dog is out in public it should be under control. That’s the law.

CherryPavlova · 08/08/2019 20:51

Our dog dislikes children because he was treated unkindly by them in his first home. Never bitten anyone in his life but he will bark very loudly if anyone is too fast in their approach- adults or child. He’s very sweet with those he’s used to.
We actively avoid children even doesn’t know. Where we can’t avoid children (ferries, pub gardens), we put ourselves and a table as a barrier to protect him from over zealous approaches. People still try and actively encourage their children to crawl under the table ‘to say hello’. I just tell them not to in a way that is clear I mean it. Children on the whole are better than daft adults who insist they are good with dogs. Their coffee usually ends up all over them because they if reasonable warning.
It just takes common sense and respect on both sides.

EllebellyBeeblebrox · 08/08/2019 20:52

On the flip side of that why don't some dog owners manage to control their dogs in public parks or play areas? It's all very well shouting "it's fine he won't hurt you" but to a small child a dog tearing towards you and jumping up is pretty scary. My ds had a real phobia of dogs for a long time because of this.
I do agree that children should all be taught not to approach dogs they don't know and ask the owner if it's okay before they do, however if your dog is likely to snap maybe it should be muzzled anyway.

KennDodd · 08/08/2019 20:52

If there is any danger your dog will bite, put a muzzle on it. Stop trying to push the blame for your dog biting onto innocent children.

Shootingstar1115 · 08/08/2019 20:53

Parents should absolutely teach their children how to behave around dogs. My two have additional needs and explaining to them is harder but we are getting there.

But then sometimes owners need some lessons to. Today I parked up in a car park. My son was stood by the door waiting for me to get my daughter out of her seat. A dog on a log leash came up to him and I swear he was going to bite. we are dog owners, we love them and most dogs we have encountered are friendly but this one really did look agressive. The owner pulled him back and said sorry. Is that it?? My son did absolutely nothing to provoke the dog, I’m not sure my son had even seen the dog until it was right by him. When he was younger he would have freaked out but his Learnt to stay calm.

When my son was really little often dogs would run up to him, he would get scared and a few times he would kick out at the dog as he didn’t know how to react (it never hurt a dog). So I think dog owners should take lessons in walking their dogs around where children will be too. Getting our own dog has helped both my children though.

There’s a guy in my village who walks his dog off lead. My son was walking home from school swinging his book bag around and a dog ran up to and went mad. Apparently the dog didn’t line the reflective strip on the book bag? Should have been on a lead in a residential area imo.

Like I said most dog Owners are great. I tell my children not to go up to dogs and often owners will say he’s fine, he’s friendly, used to children etc. Which is fabulous but I try and explain that I’m teaching them not all dogs are so if we don’t know you or the dog please don’t let the dog run up to us.

Children are unpredictable just like dogs. I think care should be taken on both sides. Both parents and dog owners.

My dog wouldn’t hurt a fly and is very much used to children and still pretty young and hyper. If we are out with her and I see a child I guide her away from them. Not that she’d ever hurt anyone but just because she’s extremely friendly but not everyone likes dogs.

NaughtToThreeSadOnions · 08/08/2019 20:54

If dog owners are going to take their dog around small children they need to teach them how to behave around small children

If owners of small children are going to take their small children round dogs they need to teach them how to behave around dogs.

It works BOTH WAYS humans need to learn how to behave around dogs, dogs need to behave around humans.

Its not very nice to be grabbed at by a person you dont know, their not moving teddy bears, their living things. You'd not expect your child to touch another child you'd teach them not too unless told/asked

Equally yes op its not right for your dog to be growling and snapping, its as much your responsablity to minimise the triggers sotuations where small hands are likely to be grabbing at YOUR dog as much as ots the parents. Its YOUR DOG. take some reaponsablity.

Obviously neither you or the parents are going to be able to avoid every situation that dog and small child might meet. Yes parents should teach their children manners and how to ask to touch the doggy before stroking it but you also should be working with your dog about its behaviour