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Original poster

To hate women at work being flirty with male colleagues?

105 replies

jennymanara · 07/08/2019 19:01

I am not talking about women who actually fancy a particular and so is flirty with him. I am talking about women who are flirty with most men they work with. I hate this way of relating, just relate professionally as work colleagues.

OP posts:
MamImHere · 07/08/2019 19:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BogglesGoggles · 07/08/2019 19:03

I find this really hard. My sense of humour is naturally inappropriate (to both sexes). Obviously I don’t do it because it’s not professional but I don’t judge people who do - it’s hard to keep yourself in check if that’s what your natural persona is like.

Original poster
jennymanara · 07/08/2019 19:04

They don't relate to other women in the same way. If it was just being friendly, they would. Instead it is giggles, lots of extra smiling and treating men as if every word they said was really important.

OP posts:
Amibeingnaive · 07/08/2019 19:10

I know what you mean OP and I agree.

socksforfox · 07/08/2019 19:15

.

Fraggling · 07/08/2019 19:17

What about men who are flirty with female colleagues?

Some people are open and smiley, with everyone. Just how they are. Don't read anything into it.

Beesandcheese · 07/08/2019 19:19

It's embarrassing in adults in a work environment.

Original poster
jennymanara · 07/08/2019 19:19

If you are smiley etc with women and men, that is the way you are. If you act differently with the opposite sex, then no that is not just the way you are with everyone.

OP posts:
Pipandmum · 07/08/2019 19:21

I dint think they are conscious of doing it. I didn’t notice it so much at work but at uni some girls would just get personality transplants around some guys. They weren’t looking to go out with the guy (they generally had boyfriends) but it was funny to witness. Not so funny at work I imagine.
Don’t notice it so much the other way (male to female).

Soozikinzi · 07/08/2019 19:23

I agree but then I am the least flirty person in the world lord knows how I ever even gave out an encouraging vibe to my husband! Luckily he is flirty enough for the two of us ! I put it down to my Dad dying when I was 6 I used to marvel at the nice relationship my friends had with their Dads.

OrangeJellySpread · 07/08/2019 19:26

It just means they are dumb. What are they trying to achieve? You never shit where you eat.

WelcomeToShootingStars · 07/08/2019 19:32

Some people are just naturally flirty, some are just looking for a bit of a giggle to make the day go a bit quicker.

As long as they're not actually doing anything inappropriate then I couldn't care less.

BigFatLiar · 07/08/2019 19:35

Considering many of these male colleagues may be married would this count as a form of sexual harassment? If your husband was one of the ones receiving the attention would you be concerned. How would you feel if it was men giving you the extra attention?

managedmis · 07/08/2019 19:38

Yeah I do this all the time

Fraggling · 07/08/2019 19:51

Some men are flirty in the office

As long as none of it is with intent then so what

Most people who are like this don't realise they are even doing it ime, they are just, well, flirty!

Original poster
jennymanara · 07/08/2019 19:53

So some thinks it does not matter? You really think it has no impact at all? A bit of harmless fun?

OP posts:
Fraggling · 07/08/2019 19:58

Well I work in an office and some men are flirty and some women are flirty. Some flirt with everyone some with the opposite sex. It's nothing to do with fun, it's some people's default setting.

If there's no intent, if they flirt with all the men or all the women or all the people, and as long as it doesn't cross a line, then so what.

I don't see an issue. What even is flirty behaviour, want to define? Smiling, over laughing, focussed Attention, what?

Original poster
jennymanara · 07/08/2019 20:01

The issue is it has an impact on how colleagues treat each other. Don't pretend if you as an attractive women flirt with all your male colleagues, that that does not have an impact.

OP posts:
PutyourtoponTrevor · 07/08/2019 20:02

We have one of these, she's always putting her arms round the men, sitting on their knees and hugging them, despite their discomfort. When one of them told her to get off him, she called him a miserable fucker and said he should be grateful!

SomeAfternoonDelight · 07/08/2019 20:09

It makes me want to vomit.

Ilovesweatybollocks · 07/08/2019 20:13

I work at a small place with 15 employees, most of whom do shift work. We all get on well and have a laugh and there's always a bit of harmless flirting. We always say it can't be sexual harassment if you've got a smile on your face. As is often the case there's one female who constantly oversteps the mark and has her hands on all the men including the contractors. I'm embarrassed for her cos she just looks desperate

goodwinter · 07/08/2019 20:34

We have one of these, she's always putting her arms round the men, sitting on their knees and hugging them, despite their discomfort. When one of them told her to get off him, she called him a miserable fucker and said he should be grateful!

That's not flirting, that's harrassment!

Fraggling · 07/08/2019 20:57

'Don't pretend if you as an attractive women flirt with all your male colleagues,'

This is personal, I think?

Who is 'you'? Who is it you are directing this at, in your head?

And why is it now attractive women?

Men flirt, women flirt. Young old fat thin attractive not attractive.

You only have a problem with attractive women who flirt though. You're not talking in general, at all. This is personal.

Sparklesocks · 07/08/2019 20:58

Has an individual incident prompted this thread? It feels quite pointed

Longlongsummer · 07/08/2019 21:02

Yep. Women flirt with DH at work all the time and it’s disgusting. They do it as they are, on the whole, the women with lesser jobs and he is a top manager.

I know this because at any work events they giggle like a school girl at DH, ask about his (OUR!) son, and then catch my eye and scuttle off without wanting to be introduced.

I want to smack them in the face!