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Original poster

Social media use whilst off work sick

217 replies

DesertOrchid558 · 01/08/2019 16:37

At work we've seen colleagues who are on long term sickness or 'working from home' posting images of themselves raising a glass or happily socialising ..either posted themselves or tagged in by other people. Not to discredit their situation but it is hard to swallow for those of us stuck for hours in a hot office day in day out. Maybe it's part of their recovery process?

OP posts:
itsahardknocklife87 · 01/08/2019 21:52

I have bipolar disorder and I have been signed off a couple of times in the last three years. Each time my consultant has encourage to not stew on it at home and get out and about. I do however avoid social media because I am worried that it might be construed as I'm taking the mick.

jmh740 · 01/08/2019 21:59

My husband is off sick he's been signed off for 2 weeks. He has MS and is having a relapse last week he was in bed all week this week I managed to persuade him to come to asda with us this week we had breakfast there and he felt really uncomfortable in case someone saw him and judged him, he then went to sit in the car while I did a quick shop. I think getting out and getting some fresh air would do him the world of good but he's scared people will judge him

Spidey66 · 01/08/2019 22:01

Depends on the circumstances.

I was off for 3 months after a hysterectomy and occasionally would post at the cinema or out for a meal, but getting out and about was part of my recovery. I was hardly painting the town red.

JemimaPuddlePeacock · 01/08/2019 22:02

I haven’t had a sick day in five years, I don’t get paid for it but I have colleagues on old contracts who take a week or two per year (never for anything chronic just generic colds etc) because they do get paid for it.

One or two weeks out of 52 isn’t really excessive or unlikely, I’m pleased for you that you are in such good health but anyone can easily reach that number through various health conditions that may not cause issues all the time (depression, migraine, flu, colds, an accidental injury, etc).

As a ‘manger’ I hope you have the sense to employ adults who you trust to make their own decisions around whether they’re well enough to work or not rather than thinking you’re somehow better because you’ve been well enough to not have a sick day in five years. Not taking sick days isn’t a badge of honour.

Karigan195 · 01/08/2019 22:04

Rather depends on why you’re off doesn’t it!

I nearly died due to sepsis and went in a hen night during the 5 week sick leave that followed but I didn’t do the nights out part just the spa and food part. It was towards the end when mostly I was told to avoid stress as any immune system set back could flare it up or something like that. So really I’d say keep your nose out until you know the full details

JemimaPuddlePeacock · 01/08/2019 22:05

Of course he shouldn’t be worrying about people judging him jmh740, but if he does why not suggest he has a word with his manager? And shares his worries with them? I know it gave me a hell of a lot of confidence and eased any worries I had about getting out and about when signed off sick knowing that I’d discussed it with my manager already and that if anyone dared approach him telling tales about seeing me in a coffee shop or out to lunch he’d be making it clear how dimly he thought of them for trying to meddle rather than thinking anything bad of me. He encouraged me getting on with my life. Could give him some peace of mind.

FishCanFly · 01/08/2019 22:07

That would be me. I would post a fabulous holiday photo while I'm actually at work 😁

LolaSmiles · 01/08/2019 22:10

It's not black and white and depends on the illness and overall context.

Off sick with an injury or complication and putting things at odds with it on social media - problematic

Someone who is always off sick for random bugs but magically ends up we'll enough to socialise - problematic

Off sick with a mental health condition and socialising with friends is likely to be a realistic part of their recovery then probably ok, but i'd also be expecting to see a phased return to work at some point rather than months of socialising and then suddenly back in.

Working from home also depends.
If it's working from home as an adjustment and they are uploading photos of them chilling in the garden then it takes the piss in my eyes. It would also take the piss if their job requires to be contactable and they're taking the approach of 'I'll just work my hours when it suits so I'll start work at 2pm today' and other people have had their work hindered in the process.

Unless the job is a flexible hours job then WFH should mean working from home during the required hours and getting the same amount done as colleagues in the office.

JenniR29 · 01/08/2019 22:10

Jemima: one or two weeks makes a huge difference to staff morale and productivity when it is always the same staff members who do it and the same ones who have to work twice as hard. This is made even more difficult and stressful when you work in a high pressure situation.

Also please don’t put manager in quote marks, I have trained extensively for my role, I take it very seriously. I am simply trying to explain why some employees people may feel aggrieved by others posting on social media.

mumtobe1984 · 01/08/2019 22:12

I work in the NHS and this behaviour is rife. If the person is off sick but is pictured/tagged on a weekend, NHS can't do anything, if it's a weekday while they are signed off sick or called in sick they will get HR involved. We once had a lady who was signed off sick with leg issues but pictured on Facebook at trampolining. She was given a warning and was on sickness monitoring after that. If you are on sick leave and want to go on holiday, as u don't have to use annual leave u still have to contact ur manager to ask permission and have a good reason. I think it really depends on where u work as to how its dealt with.....

lljkk · 01/08/2019 22:13

Yet another reason not to be 'friends' with colleagues on SM.

JemimaPuddlePeacock · 01/08/2019 22:21

If a staff member taking 5-10 days of sickness in a calendar year ‘makes a huge difference’ and there’s a culture of other coworkers keeping a look out on who’s off and assessing whether they think it’s genuine then it sounds like a very toxic workplace. When someone is off sick here nobody cares and people welcome you back with a ‘glad to see you, hope you’re feeling better’ as they’ve been getting on with their work and not taking an interest in something that doesn’t concern them. If you pick up extra work you do so knowing it’s a service issue/fault not the coworker’s and that when you need time off sick the team will cover you.

If a coworker went off sick it wouldn’t occur to me to try recall when they’d last been off and for how long and to try assess a pattern unless I was their manager and it was literally my job.

And I work in a high stress environment (NHS). Thankfully the team is made up of adults who are trusted to do their jobs when they’re able to and supported to get better when they judge themselves not well enough to come in.

I didn’t quote ‘manager’, btw. I just found it a little ironic a manager would spell their job title incorrectly!

Hithere12 · 01/08/2019 22:21

So, they might not be out and about socialising, but they're messing about updating their social media with pictures of what they did last night, or whatever - is that any better?

Do people who work from home not get a lunch break.

JemimaPuddlePeacock · 01/08/2019 22:22

If you are on sick leave and want to go on holiday, as u don't have to use annual leave u still have to contact ur manager to ask permission and have a good reason.

Wow. Very thankful that’s not the case in this NHS trust! How ridiculous.

LolaSmiles · 01/08/2019 22:25

If a coworker went off sick it wouldn’t occur to me to try recall when they’d last been off and for how long and to try assess a pattern unless I was their manager and it was literally my job.
Normally I would agree. Then I worked with someone and I could see the deadline calendar for the next 6 weeks and guess when they were going to be off sick next. Or they'd tell a story about something they'd done and you just knew they were prepping for a week off. Whilst I never shared it, I was usually right.
Them not being there affected my job and workload so I started planning to account for it.

It's like having a tutor group as a teacher you spend so much time with them that you know one student is probably going to be off because it fits their absence pattern.

If people have a predictable pattern then it's hard not to see it.

Seemstress · 01/08/2019 22:28

I was hauled into a meeting not so long ago where my Manager stated that 'some people' ie her, were unhappy that I had a picture on FB on a mutual friend's page showing me at a party when I was supposed to be off sick. My Manager is blocked from my FB. I had pneumonia and was off for 3 weeks quite illl but managed an hour at my friend's 50th birthday then went home as I felt quite rough. I was pretty pissed off that it was being brought up, and I pointed out that I was signed off from work, not life.

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 01/08/2019 22:30

jmh I am exactly like your husband - I feel scared to even pop to the shop if I am off sick! I was off with a completely disgusting cold, and by about the third day walked round to the Tesco Express ten minutes away for more tissues. I was so paranoid I would be spotted, despite the fact I couldn’t speak, and looked like I was actually dead. I went back to work the next day in case anyone had seen me out and about, and my manager sent me home before 9am.

plasterboots · 01/08/2019 22:32

Do people who work from home not get a lunch break.

Nor can they stand by a boiling kettle idling away 3 mins of their tine

JenniR29 · 01/08/2019 22:36

Jemima: I don’t think a simple typo warrants such personal abuse. You don’t know anything about my work environment or my colleagues so I really think you are being unfair and insulting.

You must be very lucky to have such a great job with fantastic colleagues who never abuse the system. Maybe I should apply where you work.

GrumpyCee · 01/08/2019 22:45

Has the OP been back to clarify the points raised? I can’t see that they have but might have missed it. I’m strangely invested in this thread!

CorbynsComrade · 01/08/2019 22:49

@JenniR29 I’m a manager too and if my team felt resentful of others taking time off sick I’d be tackling that with some team building. Luckily my team support each other and reassure one another it’s alright to take sick leave when needed. Yes we have to work harder, but that’s what teams do. We also work in a very high pressure environment.

mumtobe1984 · 01/08/2019 22:50

@jemimapuddlepeacock our trust has recently changed their sickness policy to 'attendance policy' which has been designed to deal with staff as individuals... Basically those who take the pee will be dealt with and those who are genuine get left alone.... I can see lots of grievances to follow!

Joerev · 01/08/2019 22:53

@notacooldad. I totally agree
It’s not w black and white issue and depends why they are off

For example if they are off with w broken leg. Yet are going skiing etc.

I’ve been extremely unwell now for 6 years. I’ve got some incredibly rare conditions which can make me so sick and now I have suspected brain tumour and cancer! All in one. However. I’ve taken maybe 2 days off sick? I also continue to volunteer for my local homeless shelter.
I try so very hard to keep in as good a shape as I’m physically able too. Some weeks I can go to the gym. Some weeks in in a wheelchair and in bed. However on my sick days. I don’t post on social media. I don’t actually have social media. I think it’s so crass to reveal all on social media. I read about a woman in ICU who was asking if she should post on there that’s she’s in there.....is that really how we’ve become?

The amount of things I miss by not being on social media is insane!!!! However. I love being so anonymous in life! I love how people actually ring me to see what’s going on in my life. Or text.

LolaSmiles · 01/08/2019 22:53

Seemstress
Whilst I don't condone the spying and bitching, if someone is off work with pneumonia then they're not well enough to be going to a 50th birthday party (and that's before treating everyone there to whichever germ has caused your pneumonia).

Struggling along for an hour doesn't really make any sense and it seems obvious to me that idle tongues would be wagging.

Signed off from work, not life works when the illness is work related.
Maybe everyone should do that:
So what if I ran a 10k when signed off with a bad back. I felt ok on Saturday and my back was sore during and after it but I'm signed off from work, not life
I know I said I had flu and couldn't come into work for weeks, but it was my friend's baby shower at the weekend so I went to show face. I felt really ill though so only did an hour or so, but I'm signed off from work, not life.

It sounds like a piss take. Im not saying you were making up being ill by the way; I just don't understand the logic of someone who is poorly martyring themselves and pushing themselves to attend a social event they're too ill for and being surprised when people talk.

JenniR29 · 01/08/2019 23:03

@CorbynsComrade It’s a nice idea but I don’t get funding for team building nor do I get any for overtime to cover sickness. Those of us that do turn up to work under pressure are very supportive of one another but sadly there are a few who just aren’t team players and never will be.

I inherited a lot of these problems from previous bad management and it’s very hard to change a culture of predictable and habitual sick leave.

I honestly was not trying to upset or insult anyone with my comments, it’s just frustrating sometimes when you see people relaxing on SM when you don’t have time to fart because of staff shortages. I guess I was trying to say there are two sides to this coin and it isn’t always black and white.