To think I can’t do this? (Pregnancy)

[gonewiththepotter]

I’m 5/6 weeks into a planned and very much wanted pregnancy BUT I feel so awful!!!!

Actually tested early due to horrid nausea/acid reflux/painful breasts and stabbing cervical pain. Now my hips ache when I lay in bed so having to sleep in the spare room as DH’s breathing, breath smell, body heat...and general existence is driving me crazy.

I feel poorly ALL of the time (have been signed off work) and the nausea meds don’t seem to be helping.

There’s no middle ground, either my stomach is empty and really hurts or (even if I lightly snack) I'm just hovering over a bucket!!! Literally having to carry the bucket around the house with me!

I’m miserable! I can’t imagine being able to go back to work like this. I just want to feel so useless/helpless/poorly and fed up!!!

I was so looking forward to pregnancy too 😭 so want this baby and feel really guilty for feeling the way I do now!

DH is being an angel- doing all chores/housework and listening to me complain constantly! Waking up with me when I’m nauseas in the night and doing all he can to help ... but I’m starting to resent him for his health whilst I go through this!

Pregnancy is awful. It’s a major major deciding factor in how many children we have and when. I am in awe and jealous of those who skip through it. Sadly my body treats it as an invading alien and loses the plot. I had to be off work for the whole of my pregnancies due to sickness, dehydration, anemia, SPD and glucose & thyroid issues. My only tip would be to find people who have been through it and lean heavily into their emotional support. Ignore m any comments about ginger, muscling through or “oh yes I was poorly and ate a jelly baby and felt much better”. They are fortunate to be so ignorant...

I was so miserable throughout the first trimester with my 2nd that I was bordering on depressed. I was having to cancel plans and couldn't do anything with my toddler. It really was rough but it does get better.

I'm so sorry you are going through this. I used to beg my husband to kill me and seriously considered an abortion. Nausea is vile. Don't rush back to work, and perhaps try acupuncture? Allowed me to eat a little after. Fingers crossed for you that it disappears in the 2nd trimester, and make sure your midwives know how horrific it is. My midwives only took me seriously when I mentioned I'd lost 2st since the booking in appointment, but by then the nausea had (thankfully) disappeared.

You poor thing. I'm due in a couple of weeks and this takes me back to when I couldn't have DH near me for a while because his face smelled. Everything smelled like gone off milk to me but the sensation did go away. Your nausea sounds awful-I reiterate PP advice to go back to midwife to re-assess medication/develop coping strategies. Take care and good luck ☺

I HATE being pregnant, have been where you are 3 times now and each one of them was a choice 😂

Take one day at a time and keep going OP, it's totally worth it 🥰

Are you taking antenatal vitamins? There is a very well known brand which is renowned for causing sickness in pregnancy. Is it possible you are having twins? It may explain feeling unwell so early in the pregnancy.

You poor love. I don’t think it’s possible to understand just how grim it feels. It’s literally like your whole being is focussed on feeling or being sick. And nausea is just as bad if not worse as there isn’t even any of the temporary relief that being sick brings.

Def go back to GP. DD was able to work through the early stages of her first pregnancy as her sickness was in the evenings. The second pregnancy was a different ballgame and she couldn’t turn over in bed without incredible nausea rising up. I joked that maybe she was having twins. Turned out she was.

I vomited every day up until about 13 weeks and intermittently until last week (now 17 was) l. Seems to have completely stopped now and have more energy.

It does get better so hang in there.

If you're struggling to feel positive, an early scan really helped me (I was the opposite - had an early bleed and zero "symptoms" so struggled to believe there was actually anything in there). I had a private scan at 8 weeks at a Window to the Womb clinic and it was a lovely experience and made it all real.

How are you today OP?

You have all my sympathy. I've done it twice, both pregnancies awful, the second the worst, feeling like you do and trying to care for a toddler was horrific. In hindsight, I developed antenatal depression, but didn't let on to anyone how bad it was. I would lie in bed googling terminations. The misery was all-consuming. Please don't hold back and make sure people support you. I really do recommend trying different meds - cyclizine worked for DC1 but didn't do a thing in my second pregnancy but Avomine (sp) made it manageable.

I wept with relief the day after having my second DC, literally sobbed with joy that I never, ever have to do this again. But, I'm sat here with the most scrumptious (if exhausting) four year old, and his lovely sibling is snoozing away upstairs, and I could not love two people more - it really will be worth it.

Try and just nibble on ginger biscuits.

And drinks with citrus are good for nausea.,

I had mild cramps but severe pains sounds abit concerning have you contacted the EPU at your hospital. I was rushed for an early scan just for cramps so I’m sure they would be concerned with strong pains

can you keep some crackers in your bedside table and eat one before lifting your head when you wake up
seabands might help
keep cold, warm makes you feel sicker
ice blocks/Popsicles plain no dairy clear ice blocks help keep you hydrated, without stressing your stomach
sometimes ginger helps, chew a thin slice of fresh or preserved ginger
lay under a running shower for a while

dont feel alone, take it hour by hour, sleep as much as you can, when you cant focus on something to try to take your mind off it, repeat the alphabet over and over, count the vowels on the packaging of something ( mine was loo paper packaging, cause it was there) and know that you will get thru this, even if it lasts the entire 9 months, you CAN do this... ice blocks, stay cold, ginger etc, might/might not help but give it a try
the ice blocks help you stay cold as well as gently hydrating you

I felt sick til about 20 weeks with all my pregnancies - was definitely worse than the giving birth part!

Never really found anything that consistently helped but I did try the sea sickness sea bands with my last pregnancy and I think they did help ease it a bit.

Oh God this sounds horrendous. My first pregnancy was shit. Not as bad as yours but still shit. 2nd was a breeze. Hopefully this passes for you soon.

Thank you all for the amazing support
@7sunnysundays ❤️☺️ Such a cutie, I can’t wait for LO to be here!!

@NoSauce - I’m almost afraid to say it... but for the last couple of hours I’ve felt ‘almost’ healthy again. Managed to scoff beans on toast, spinach and butternut squash mash and even some choc/biscuits (small portions but still!)

Literally feel like I’ve eaten SO much and (as of yet) none has come back! I really thought the choc/biscuits would be the death of me but I REALLY wanted them...so just went with it!

Very mild nausea/heart burn currently but so far (and after a shit morning) today has been a much better day! Don’t think it will last though, I’ve had sporadic ‘good’ periods and they’ve only lasted a couple of hours!

I think it’s the not knowing that drives me CRAZY.
DH/DM are constantly banging on the ‘It might be done as of tomorrow/ It WILL get better soon’ drum and I’m starting to get really angry/frustrated as it just makes me feel like I’m being such a ‘negative nelly’ and a ‘drama queen’.

I know they’re just saying it to try and help but I had VERY sharp words with DH last night (when I was really struggling) and basically said ‘HOW ABOUT I KICK YOU IN THE BALLS AND TELL YOU ITS FINE ...BECAUSE IT’LL FEEL BETTER IN A FEW MINUTES?

He’s not told me ‘It might be gone tomorrow’ or ‘it’ll be better soon!’ Since and he gave me a nice long massage with my favourite music on! Didn’t even try to stop once...kept going until I fell asleep 😬

Between 6weeks and 11 weeks i would throw up after a sip of water. Or after a few spoons of plain rice (all I could manage). It was hell.

I never had acid reflux before pregnancy but all of a sudden I had it terribly. Indigestion (after just a glass of water!) was out of this world.

After a little while, gaviscon did nothing and I'm not kidding but the world its self would have me running for the bathroom!

Doctor gave me omeprozole at 11 weeks pregnant and it was like an instant cure! (Ranitidine didn't work)

I'm 21weeks pregnant now and if I don't take them, I suffer all day. I'm at the point now where perhaps I need to up the dose as it's starting to get bad again)

Not saying itll cure you, but might be worth a go xxx

On another note (because I don’t want to start a whole new thread)

Would anybody mind offering me some perspective on sex?

DH and I havnt DTD since we found out (obviously nausea and stabby cervix pains aren’t a turn on) but I had 100% lost all interest in it. It’s the first time EVER that we’ve gone more than 1 week without (usually I rather like it 🙈)!

DH (and I have to give him credit here) is behaving like a eunuch. Not a single hint/insinuation/attempt from him- completely respectful. I’m just starting to worry that I won’t want to do it again...for a long while. Last night DH said he wouldng mind if it was the the entire pregnancy as he couldn’t enjoy it knowing I was comfortable...etc. But has that really happened to anyone?
Is the sudden lack of interest in sex normal?
Is it ok for a (newly ish) married couple to actually not DTD for 9 months (plus however long recovery takes)?

Aw sorry OP, I'm the same at the moment. 7 weeks currently and no vomitting but just nauseous all the time.

I start to feel alright and then will be running to the bathroom but nothing ever comes up.

I'm surviving on ice lollies at the moment.

*wasn’t comfortable

Being pregnant is shit, I sympathise. I'm 15 weeks in and struggling to see how I will make it to 40 with my sanity intact. Look fat, feel ill, can't drink wine...

Oh, and I would be content never to have sex again

Oh OP glad to hear your feeling semi better! Take it a day at a time, I think you just need to eat what you fancy (if you can stomach it!) and don't worry about eating healthy foods! I remember the sickness feeling well, it's so much worse than actually being sick isn't it!

I've had four sons, and we had sex during pregnancy for three of them. The forth one we didn't (anxiety based reasons). DH was fine with it 😁 well he had to be!!

I have zero libido in the first trimester. However my hormones make me make up for it once I get to the 2nd so you may well want to when you don't feel ill.

I think there is a lot of well meaning but bad advice in this thread.

You have hyperemesis. It doesn't even matter of you do anyway, there are treatments that will make you feel better regardless.

Contact pregnancy sickness support on 024 7638 2020. Leave them a message tonight and they will call you back in the morning. Ask what drugs you can try. Ask them to send you some official guidelines on what meds your GP should try and at what strengths. Print this off and make an urgent appointment with your GP tomorrow.

There are at least seven different drugs you can try, all with minimal risks. And you can take different combinations of them too.

There are clear guidelines of what should be prescribed to people with your symptoms, but GPs are generally not well educated so just going to your GP without knowing your stuff may not help.

If you are feeling to sick to sort all this, ask someone like your DH to advocate for you. If your GP is reluctant to prescribe you expensive meds, find a new GP.