What 3 things would you not be seen dead wearing?

[recklessruby]

Aibu to ask what 3 things you would never ever wear (not necessarily together).
Mine are a bikini (too much like underwear in public and have wobbly cellulite)
High heels (i want to be able to walk when i m out not flouder around like a drunk ostrich)
And this horrible horrible hair colour i have accidentally dyed my hair (it was light brown fairish and is now freakishly white blonde).
Please distract me from crying about my hair horror until the shops open and i can sort it out!!

Uggs
Animal print
Crocs

Gym pants - grim
High heels - I'd fall over
Make up - good skin/no wrinkles and DH says I look better without it.

Skechers
Cold shoulder tops
Wide legged three quarter length trousers

Ooh - I do have a band top. It's not a novelty one though. Worn it so much it's falling apart at the seams, literally. It definitely passes the 3-song rule, so I'm in the clear. 'tis my only print top. I'm pretty boring, fashion-wise.

Worn it so much it's falling apart at the seams

That's the best type of band top!

Belly tops
Anything with hyper colours/busy patterns
Bum hugger shorts/skirts
Strap top/leggings combo (I wear strap tops in hot weather though)

TBF I consider it a win if my clothes aren’t covered in stains at be end of the day (twin toddlers who have recently discovered throwing their food at me is great fun) so my standards probably aren’t the best 😂

Synthetic fibres in 'regular' clothes, such as tops, dresses or trousers. Why, just why?
Plastic shoes.
Those godawful stacked heel monstrosities with zip fronts.

Ugg boots 🤢
Fur
Gilets of any description

Throwing in a fourth - tan tights 🤢

Anything yellow. Makes me look like I’ve been dug up from 6 feet under
Jumpsuits - pain in the arse if you want to have a wee
Thongs. Uncomfortable instruments of torture.

Ugg boots (where I am from they were always seen as really cheap and trashy but then somehow became popular!)
Crocs
Bootleg cut jeans

Tattoos
Fake eyelashes
Blonde hair.
Dangly earrings
White leggings.

Wide legged cropped trousers - especially the stripey ones

Wide leg trousers or clown pants

Hareem pants

Polo shirt

Thongs (the pain)
Bodysuits (even worse)
Fur
Uggs
Crocs
Capri Pants (terrible ankles)
Belly tops
Anything backless or halter neck (very self conscious about back acne)

Think I should just go out after dark!!!

Fur/snakeskin/crocodile etc
Floral Patterns
Onesie

Linen trousers
Uggs
Crocs
Fit flops
Those trainers that separate the big toe

Ugg boots
Crocs
Fake tan

Jogging bottoms which are elasticated at the bottom, white socks and hideous yeti boots 😱

Flip flops
Fur
Leggings
Any sportswear when not doing said activity, or travelling to it.

Teeny tiny shorts
Anything referring to wine, kids etc
Lace
Spaghetti straps
Thongs
Hooker heels
Excessively logo’d bags, eg LV, Coach
Skinny jeans
White
Lace
Frills
Peplums

Body con dress
Leopard print
Stilettos

Any kind of a hat.
Anything yellow (Snap! HelenaNightSoilCart).
Bikini.
Heels over 2 inches.
Anything with a logo, but especially not any Disney related logos.
Tattoo.
Drawstring waist anything.
YYY to thongs.

Those painted on Groucho Marx eyebrows
What the hell is that about

False tan,always looks patchy
Thongs,feels like a cheese slicer cutting my arse to ribbons

Really heavy make up,the one with contouring and loads of eyeshadow/lipstick.It feels like it should be sliding off your face.And it doesnt look good.

These...

Fur
Animal print
Crocs
😖