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DH has disappeared and left son at a festival

945 replies

dogletsrock · 27/07/2019 00:04

My DH is a recovering alcoholic and has seemed to be doing really well. He took my 15 year old son to a festival today at the other end of the country. At about 7pm he told my son he was going to the toilet and has not been heard of since. My son has Aspergers and is in the tent really scared. I cannot get there until 11 o’clock tomorrow as they have the car and I will have to get a train. On one hand I am beyond angry but also terrified as he has tried to kill himself when drunk before. I am beside myself with worry. What can I do?

OP posts:
phoneinbag · 27/07/2019 07:45

Hoping it all works out for you op

Jayaywhynot · 27/07/2019 07:45

Good luck, let us know what happens, I'm on tenderhooks for you. Love your parenting, you must have been awake half the night judging by the timelines on your posts and now your going to get your son, you go mama bear! We're all rooting for you Flowers

stucknoue · 27/07/2019 07:45

The car parks for festivals are separate before the entry point and at most the camping is separate from the arena - this won't be that unusual for them, plenty of parents have collected the belongings teens who have overdone it! Hopefully there's a more innocent explanation to all this - phone batteries go flat. Let us know, thinking of you

BertrandRussell · 27/07/2019 07:46

Of course the OP is worried. But she knows her son is safe. He’s had a horrible fright but he is safe and well. Don’t ramp up the drama.

Knitwit99 · 27/07/2019 07:47

Your son has done really well, to know to call you, to speak to the strangers who called him, to stay there and stay calm all night, and to hopefully get himself to you this morning. I hope he's feeling proud of himself. And I hope it all works out for you both this morning

SchrodingersUnicorn · 27/07/2019 07:47

OP you must be so worried! Just a thought though, is there anywhere you can get some sleep before driving home? You've been up all night and I imagine the adrenaline will fade when you've got your son safe with you. Be safe!

UnchangedFaces321 · 27/07/2019 07:47

I fully understand your husband is a recovering alcoholic. However, to get drunk at a festival which he's taken your 15 year old son with Aspergers to, then to leave him on his own is fucking horrendous. I probably wouldn't forgive my husband over this- but I'm not suggesting you don't forgive yours (nor am I suggesting you should)

MegaMonsterMunch · 27/07/2019 07:48

Good luck. I'd be taking your son home and leaving your husband there, though. I hope you're okay and your son is too. I know alcoholism is a disease but to me this is unforgivable

Auramigraine · 27/07/2019 07:51

Awww @dogletsrock hope your not too far away now Flowers what a horrible situation for you and your DS x

Belledan1 · 27/07/2019 07:51

Good luck. x

TokyoSushi · 27/07/2019 07:51

Oh my, I've just come across this thread, you're doing so well OP, I hope everybody is OK Flowers

RumpoleoftheBaileys · 27/07/2019 07:51

Hope all goes well x

Scarydinosaurs · 27/07/2019 07:51

I hope you have your son back home soon xx

Putapeonyinyourpocket · 27/07/2019 07:51

Goodness just read through this, you poor thing! You've done all you can now, hope your son is ok. Leave your husband there and see how he feels stranded!

LionKingLover · 27/07/2019 07:52

I really hope your DH got lost or something and lost signal. Your poor son and also you. Sending love x

Sorryandstressed · 27/07/2019 07:52

Good luck op hope all turns out ok

Nousernameforme · 27/07/2019 07:53

Do you know which bit they are camped in? Tell security what happened and that you just need to go and get your son and the car. If that doesn't work phone the police again and say you are here to pick him up they will have people on site that can escort you.

Have you thought how you are going to get your tent and things home? Tbh I would just be taking ds and leaving dh to deal with it all on his own but then would he not just leave all your stuff there and blame you?

caughtinanet · 27/07/2019 07:55

Good point about not trying to drive straight home after no sleep, once you're inside the festival it might be worth you having a sleep if you can.

Does your DS want to come home or are the band's he wants to see playing today?

Wonderland18 · 27/07/2019 07:56

This thread is really hard to read, you must be so worried and angry all at once OP.
Your poor DS.
I hope everything works out good and your home with your son knowing he’s safe in no time Flowers

BertrandRussell · 27/07/2019 07:57

OP- does your son have bands he wants to see today? Do talk to him about that before you rush him home again.

littlebird88 · 27/07/2019 07:57

you have done the right thing for sure.

JustGettingStarted · 27/07/2019 08:00

Does anyone know what time the op expects to arrive at the festival?

ssd · 27/07/2019 08:00

Wishing you strength op. For you and your son.

WhoKnewBeefStew · 27/07/2019 08:02

Hope it all goes well OP Thanks

allflownthenest · 27/07/2019 08:03

Hope all goes well for you. As for your DH, he has to want to help himself before you can help him. Look after yourself and your son first. Good luck