I’ve name changed but don’t actually post that often anyway. I have been married to my husband for just over 30 years. I have found him extremely difficult for a long time now. We have 3 adult children- only our youngest who is 24 lives with us. She has multiple special needs (autistic, adhd, Tourette’s and Emotional difficulties) so I have always wanted stability for her. He has been lying and going out to dinner with a younger woman (he says there is another man there too but I’m not sure) and has been going on days out with her (again he says there is another man there). He has lied and said she isn’t there but later when he is caught out lying says he doesn’t ‘fucking care’. He blames me as he says I always nag at him and that’s why he lies. He has hit our daughter a lot over the years (he doesn’t do it anymore though) and has kicked her also. She can be difficult sometimes but it is not an excuse for his behaviour. He has also taken her bedroom door off in the past. One night he told her to drop dead. He has held my head down the toilet many times and dragged me along the carpet (he has said that he stopped when I screamed that he was hurting me). He has also held my head between his legs and farted .i have recordings of him admitting that he has done all of these things. He works full time and I look after our daughter but I do everything at home but he still feels that I should be more grateful to him. I want to separate now but he says that he won’t move out and I don’t have anywhere to take our daughter. I really don’t know what to do. I know this isn’t an aibu but I don’t have anyone I can ask for help and I really need it. Thank you for reading x