Period poverty

[ChocolateAndMoreChocolate]

AIBU to remind you period poverty exists?

Came on this morning, did not have any sanitary items. Asked my DM to send me £5 until payday (Friday). She could only PayPal so I tried to withdraw the funds and I’m on a 72 hour wait!

So no view of having sanitary items for 3 days... and now I also hate pay pal

londonrach there's plenty of menstrual cups on Amazon that cost less than £10. Of course the OP can't afford it today but it's something she might want to consider for the future.

Someone who is down to their last 50p may no be able to use a cup because - well you need to be able to clean it.

If you are on a low budget then hot water can be a luxury - a kettle of water will allow you to strip wash and do dome dishes but you need to be able to wash your hands and the cup. You also need to do some form of sterilisation each month.

And before anyone tells me how much it costs to boil a kettle, lots of blocks of flats have a plug in the hallway for use by cleaners and contractors.

Jelly, there’s a whole other interesting discussion in there, because yes, ‘I was that child’ is an emotional argument and obviously you’ll feel strongly about it.

However, teachers aren’t rich. I’m a HOD of a core subject and until recently, £1500 of my take home £2300 went on childcare and the rest on my mortgage, leaving DH with debt repayments, food, clothes ... tbh we were really struggling, including one particularly hairy moment when a client didn’t pay DH one month (he is SE) meaning I was in a slight panic over how to get to work as it was the week before payday and I had NO money! Luckily CEx came through for me!

If I was in such a scheme I would undoubtedly feel pressured to contribute because to do otherwise would make me look heartless. I don’t think that’s fair. Staff will have their own financial pressures on them, often that you will not know. I was having a chance conversation with my line manager who said the summer would be ‘shit’ because half the roof on his house fell in and they were struggling.

This is where we can run into problems because much of the public sector has a left wing bias and that’s one that isn’t really rooted in individual agency. Helping the poor children by buying them shampoo and sanitary protection sounds very noble and I knew I’d get somebody getting very cross with me for objecting. But the issue I have is that I know that if you presume people are unable to help themselves, the suggestion is always more help, more intervention, more professionals, more support - more money.

I work in a school that isn’t in a hugely salubrious area. Just the same, there are plenty of nice, privately owned or rented homes around it that aren’t Knightsbridge but aren’t the third world either. But to hear the staff at my school talk, it’s a suburb of Mumbai. ‘Some of these kids’ (it’s always these kids) ‘have never left the estate!’ which is bollocks, I’ve seen them myself ‘going up town miss!’ and we also have a high proportion of Eastern European students so how never having left the estate when they left their country works I don’t know!

I absolutely think we should have some sanitary towels available in schools. I also sometimes think setting homework as ‘have a shower’ might be a good idea. But I’m REALLY uncomfortable with the above. It isn’t our job to to giving children personal hygiene items. How do you find them - ‘hey, Nathan, you stink, here’s a toothbrush and some deodorant?’

Can you visit someone for a cup of tea who stores their sanpro in a basket in the bathroom/toilet? I know plenty of people who store sanpro there, you could loot them (or pay them back in a few days).
Don't you sound lovely, suggesting OP steal from her friends.
There is an easy solution to not being able to afford sanpro, and that is get reusable sanpro for free. There are numerous groups on Facebook etc. where people give away stuff for free. Get a menstrual cup or reusable pads from there. Or make your own from an old towel/teacloth/t shirt/cloth nappy. If you don't have any, ask someone else - nearly everyone has old items of clothing they don't need. Will save you a lot of money in the long run, meaning you will have the money for the washing powder, electricity etc. you will need to wash them.
Period poverty is a modern concept produced by single use sanpro. I should know, seeing as I haven't spent anything on sanpro for years (not counting water, electricity and detergent, but I have never washed my pads on their own so I don't spend any extra money on them).

@Derbee Does it EVER occur to you, and others spouting about insertables that NOT EVERY ONE CAN USE THEM.

I haven't been able to use tampons since I had children, much less a friggin moon cup! They are not the solve-all you all think they are!!

I second asking a neighbour. Also stock up when you can, it really is a necessity. I buy £1 packs of San pro, not the most expensive but they do the job. Could your mum not send you a pack instead of the money? Hope you get your hands on some.

@hashtagthathappened, it’s not something I feel strongly about and I’m not cross about you questioning the funding - I’m just glad that sometimes people act on their own initiative to help others.

Yes, I was that child. I’m also a CP social worker so see first hand the challenges some children face just to physically get to school, never mind be in a place to access learning. I don’t think it’s a teachers job to supply basic toiletries any more than I think it’s mine but there are times when I stretch a bit, or give a bit to make lives easier at times when I’m doing ok.

And I’d have no issue with a school setting aside a small proportion of funding (a little PEF funding in Scotland maybe) to provide access to basics of it helps children access education on an equal footing.

Or we could explore why our society thinks it’s ok to keep people at such a level of poverty.

It is a whole other discussion which may be interesting but I don’t feels as strongly about it as you seem to think, I just thought it was a kindness that I and others would have appreciated.

Well it’s true I’ve never met a right wing social worker but do you notice your language? That society keeps them at.

I've been there and used folded tissue till I could get some pads, I now use a Meluna menstrual cup it was only £12 and lasting me nearly 5 years so far. I do keep a few pads in my bag for emergencies though.

@shieldmaidenofrohan - Hobnobs, I remember MN (back in the mists of time) when I'm pretty sure there was no PM feature..

There used be a CAT feature which you paid to access.

@hashtagthathappened I agree with you. I grew up in a poor area and we were taught in PHSE at 12, how often we should wash, change our clothes, etc. There was a recognition that some children would not have been taught this.
But the other thing I have noticed is that is other people step in and start feeding and clothing a child to help, neglectful parents can sometimes totally stop doing anything, They give up any responsibility they felt as someone else is doing it. And I think in the long term this can leave the child more vulnerable.

@hashtagthathappened society (as in our laws, social structures, tax systems, benefits systems) do act to keep people in poverty. When we as a society accept sanctions on benefits payments, accept a two child rule on tax credits, accept the privatisation of services and supports, accept the idea of undeserving poor we contribute to systems that keep people in poverty.

And yes, I’d lose my social work stripes if I wasn’t left leaning

I’m sorry but periods happen pretty regularly if you’re not pregnant or breastfeeding, and even if you’re not having them regularly you know that you will get them at some point, how difficult is it to make sure you always have a pack of tampons or pads stashed away, you can get them for a pound!

It’s not period poverty, it’s bad planning.

No period poverty is real. But you can use toilet paper, socks, face cloths instead. Commercial sanpro has only existed for a tiny amount of time in human history.

Of course poverty exists and of course I see the need for a benefits system plus charitable organisations to address it.
But “period poverty”? Ridiculous. As I’ve said up thread, my parents generation didn’t have commercial sanpro and were all perfectly capable of making reusable washable pads out of rags or whatever they had available, even in the direst poverty.
MIL spent 4 years in a concentration camp and managed with folded rags. Mother lived in a slum with no flush toilet an alcoholic father and extreme poverty - ditto,
I do think some modern women are displaying learned helplessness, having no resourcefulness or ability to improvise, and expecting the state to just do everything for them.

how difficult is it to make sure you always have a pack of tampons or pads stashed away, you can get them for a pound!

You have absolutely no idea what poverty means do you?

If using a pound for tampons means not eating for a day, or perhaps your kids not eating for a day, which day would you choose to go without?

That’s a very extreme example though wiggly

hashtagthathappened how very out of touch you are.

Are you aware that the government have put a system in place where people applying for Universal Credit must wait 5 weeks for money up front.

If you are late or miss your appointments, you get sanctioned (ie your money is cut). If yiu get sabctiomed multipe times you can lose your benefits. People are routinely sabctioned for things like hospital appointments.

A man on universal credit died because he couldn't afford electricity so his fridge couldn't keep his life saving insulin cool. The autopsy showed he had nothing in his stomach. That's just one example that stuck with me. Thousands (some estimate more then 100,000) have died because poverty because of austerity - that means because of decisions this government has taken.

This government have been the architects of a cruel system that's driving people into real poverty, ill health and even death.

In this country, thousands of women have to choose between basics such as food / electricity/ shoes for kids and sanitary protection for themselves. Thousands have budgets where losing a pound would be felt.

If this is news to you, please do some research into poverty in the UK, you are massively out of touch.

I do think some modern women are displaying learned helplessness, having no resourcefulness or ability to improvise, and expecting the state to just do everything for them
Well I think you might have a point in that a lot of very basic life skills have been lost or forgotten, though not just by women, however in a modern society, the 6th wealthiest nation in the world, everyone should be able to afford at least cheap sanpro and other basic toiletries. Of course if they want to improvise for enviromental or other reasons thats
fine. Being frugal and 'make do and mend' is cool, but no one should be faced with having to go through a period without proper sanitary towels, which probably only cost pennies to produce.
I had to use toilet paper and old rags when I was a teenager and I always swore my daughter would always have what she needed. Even so I still had to get some from a food bank a couple of times. Thank goodness a kind person donated them.

I had very heavy periods before an ablation and found sainsburys towels to be excellent, 60p.

If anyone on here knows a Uk charity for Uk women and girls that will take reusable cloth pads, I'm happy to send myself and spread the word. I tried my local red box charity and they refused all reusables.

For the "I don't believe period poverty exists" I think it's came around separate from "poverty" as it's a regular and unavoidable extra expense for the majority of females from 10-55. Reusable pads are probably the sensible way forward but not practical in every situation (12hr shift anyone ewwwww) I'm sorry about your predicament OP hope things get better.

For what it’s worth, Aldi (in Germany but UK Aldi usually has the same offers) had menstrual cups on offer a couple of weeks back. Might be worth looking out for going forward

I use cloth sanitary towels which will last me years now. It's a relief to know I always what what I need. I just bought 1 every month until I had a collection.

The Aldi pads are cheap and about 50p and work quite well.

Otherwise you can cut up a towel or an old piece of clothing and double it up a few times. I have a couple of friends who just use a flannel

12 hours shift and reusables? how about making a mini wet bag and changing as you would when you go to the loo? If you aren't allowed to go to the loo, speak to Unison.

I give frequently to people in need, but this is ridiculous. Many of us have been caught short. There was a time when no shops were open Sundays or the time I was on a trip thousands of miles from home and my period started a week early. We manage. Socks, toilet paper etc.

You're at home OP cut up some old towels or rags. Learn to plan better. I'll save my money for the people who really need it.