Class wedding - just me or is it a bit creepy?

[NotAnotherJaffaCake]

CofE primary, quite churchy. Rural catchment so no choice of schools unless you want to drive. They are organising a Class Wedding for one of the KS1 class - basically role playing a wedding at the local church.

Is it just me or is this creepy? Can't put my finger on it but it feels entirely inappropriate for small children. It's one thing kids messing about playing but another thing to be told by a vicar that God will not permit divorce. And there is no way this school will demonstrate a Jewish or Hindu wedding, let alone a gay one. And how do the kids whose parents have split up or never married in the first place feel?

AIBU?

It’s not creepy just a bit weird, but I cat really see the harm.

Then if I didn’t agree with the schools values I would definitely drive my dc to another school, no way would I send my child to a school I didn’t agree with and then moan about.

It’s a Church of England school so hardly surprising it’s like this really really. That would be like sending a child to the local catholic secondary school near my village and being surprised by mass! But I know a mum that is

Write a strongly worded letter of complaint outlining your concerns OP, I'm sure the staff could use a laugh.🤣

I do think that they should teach religious education to provide children with an understanding of other religions, and with the understanding that RE is like geography or history, not as a chance to reinforce Christianity, which already runs through the school on many levels.

OP it is a faith school. What did you honestly expect? My DD's go to a Catholic school because we are Catholic. They are taught lots about other religions including Judaism and Islam but Catholicism is 'reinforced' because it is a Catholic school.

RE is like geography or history, not as a chance to reinforce Christianity
^Christian Schhol Reinforces Christian Values Shocker!^
Just tell them your child can't take part or keep DC off schoo ltbay day. The kids will in all liklihood enjoy getting out of school, some of them getting dressed up and role playing being grown up just like playing doctors or firefighters or Mommy's and Daddy's.

When I was tiny, my class had a roleplay marriage - Q married U. I honestly can't remember more than they were inflated letter people (Q
had a top hat, U a veil), different kids carried/played different characters and I think we dressed up for it and had snacks. I don't think it really impacted my adult choices, it was just general cultural knowledge as while we all knew it, some would never have attended or been part of a wedding of any type (and maybe a weird way of doing phonics/spelling).

I can see why some might find it creepy or odd and people are free to push against it or for wider inclusion (if there are places nearby that could do so) if they think it's a big issue, but I think most of the issues will go over little kids' heads. Kids are typically aware by school-age of the common Christian imagery around marriage, even when coming from homes where that doesn't happen, just like kids know about Christmas and Easter even if in a home that doesn't celebrate those as they're everywhere. Showing a CoE wedding doesn't mean they're disrespecting any other kind or ways of living and parents can discuss their thoughts on this version and show and discuss other celebrations if they want, there are plenty of resources available and it's what those of us who celebrate differently just do.

I don't get why schools should be expected to show everything. If it's important to you kids that your kids know or experience something, then do it. I think it has more impact if parents make a continuous effort to show something than a one-off performance at school that will be mostly forgotten.

The roots of CofE lie in the ability to divorce (Henry IIIV created it to divorce his wife) so it would be peculiar for the Vicar to say they can’t divorce.

There is no discussion of weddings in other faiths at all. If it were in the context of a balanced RE curriculum with other faiths, fine

There will be. The national curriculum covers all these things, but not at the same time! It's KS1! They're only just starting the RE coverage. Cof E aided school cover other religions and cultures in exactly the same way that other state schools do. Most of their staff will be from other religions and none, and other cultures, of course.

Seriously, chill pills need handing out liberally on this thread.

The current CofE wedding service is very different from the patriarchal version people may know from the tv. The vows are identical for the man and the woman.

It’s not creepy but it’s a bit yuck. You would think they have something better to do.

I really wish that schools were secular in this country. I don’t see any place for religion in schools whatsoever. It’s divisive and causes inequalities in society. Why the hell should some children be able to access more schools than other children based on their parents religious beliefs. It’s ridiculous and very outdated.

so it would be peculiar for the Vicar to say they can’t divorce

Some parishes still don’t marry divorcees but it’s quite rare. But there is obviously nothing to stop people actually getting divorced.

I hope people realise that in demanding that schools don't cover things you don't believe in or approve of, you're acting in exactly the same way as the parents who kicked off about the lgbt curriculum at that Birmingham school.

You seriously cannot start controlling everything that your kids experience at school.

Typo sorry.
‘never done’ not ‘been done’

You've sent your child to a CoE school, what else do you expect?

If you don't agree with it then send them to another school.

I went to a catholic school , not CofE and we were taught about all the different religions OP

You've sent your child to a CoE school, what else do you expect?

If you don't agree with it then send them to another school.

Where they will probably do the same thing. My kids went to a church to see the font and have a mock baptism, and their school wasn't Cof E. They also went to various other religions' places of worship. As I keep saying, this is NATIONAL CURRICULUM stuff. All this school is doing (as many do) is making it more interesting by actually going to the church and making the information more interesting with role play (because these kids are still young and enjoy it)

Our school do that for Y1's. Never really thought about it that hard. Its a fun day of dress up for them and a morning out (they hold it at the church and our vicar performs the 'ceremony')
The parents can state if they don't want their kids to attend and they just stay at school and join another class for the morning.

I think it's entirely inappropriate for numerous reasons.
It's a giant leap further than some posters' ideas of mock ceremonies within the classroom which is something I also did in nursery. Children acting out a wedding is much more innocent than a realistic ceremony within a church. Fuck that. I wouldn't go along with it.

Dd goes to a rural CoE primary, she has just finished Y2. Last year, in Y1 her class did an assembly about Celebrations from around the world or something. They acted out a Christian wedding; a Bar Mitzvah and something else ..... . They also spoke about other festivals from other religions. It was in October/November time and they lit up their classroom for Diwali, and also went to visit a mosque with the yeargrouo above (this year they went with the yeargroup below to visit a Sikh Gudwara). At the very end of term - just before Christmas- they talked about paganism and the significance of the winter and summer solstices to that belief system. It was a brilliant topic and I thought the school delivered it well.

What is wrong with a CoE school acting out a CoE wedding? The divorce stuff sounds weird - a bit Catholic! - but everyone knows that marriage exists, even if they have no experience of it in their own family.

Children acting out a wedding is much more innocent than a realistic ceremony within a church.Fuck that. I wouldn't go along with it

What? A faith school is educating its pupils on how an actual CoE wedding would take place. Its for educational purposes only. They are showing the children in a real sense what a Church wedding entails, I honestly can't understand the horror this is causing? I'm going to have to stay away from this thread because my head is about to implode on itself

I'd be ok with it IF they were enacting marriage ceremonies from other religions. Every religion/culture has rites of passage and these are studied as part of RS.
Are they also enacting baptisms/christenings, confirmations and funerals?
Are they going to have some hideous selection process for who will be the bride etc? (like the awful competition for rolesat the Nativity)

I wouldn't have found it weird 10 - 15 years ago, but I do a little nowadays.

I suppose because ultimately marriage is about sexual union - you
must consummate a heterosexual marriage with sexual intercourse for it to be legally valid. So it seems odd to encourage children to act out the ceremony that leads up to it.

Have teddy bears as the bride and groom instead?

The other aspect is that child marriage (for girls as young as 9 or 10) is a very real and genuine problem in many parts of the world. :(

Children acting out a wedding is much more innocent than a realistic ceremony within a church
What exactly makes it less innocent? Do you think it's somehow indoctrination Christian children in a Christian school olinto the Christian faith?? Or do you think the married kids will have to sit together all year and hold hands and if they stop being friends they'll be ostracised for getting a divorce?? They're hardly going to be talking about consumating the marriage and wishing children on them!!

Even C of E schools learn about other religions. It's in the curriculum