To ask if you would ever give the police a false alibi for your partner?

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Me and DH randomly got onto this today and he asked if I ever would, if asked. I said no, regardless of what the “crime” was. He said he would for me, but not for murder!
Wondered what the general consensus of Mumsnet was!

No, don't even think going there.

Absolutely fucking not.. It was bad enough giving a genuine alibi for my partner (though not really needed in the end) to snotty police woman giving me that 'silly partner covering for his partner look'...

I dton thinik thats the same asta as he didnt actually do anything im thinking more of the people who have

But Asta, that would be an actual alibi if your grandad wasn’t the murderer, and you knew because you’d been with him in the woods.

Depends on the crime

If I genuinely believed loved one to be innocent AND (this is essential) in danger of being stitched up by the police, I might consider it.

That said, I’m in no hurry to be the next Maxine Carr.

It depends. Sometimes you might be in the wrong place at the wrong time but be innocent. Or not be anywhere near the crime scene but have nothing to prove it. In that case, I might say "yes he was at home with me". I think you know if your partner is innocent or not.

We dont know if Maxine Carr actually knew that she was giving an alibi for a child murderer. Originally they were just missing

Yet in her tv interviews in the immediate aftermath, she was referring to Jessica in the past tense: “She was a lovely girl”

But then again, if you know your partner is innocent (and I mean KNOW) but looks circumstantial suspicious, then perhaps many of us would be tempted to bend the truth a little to help them clear their name?

Providing an alibi for someone was has actually done something wrong is a different matter.

Lockheart has it I think.

It's very easy to say 'no I'd never' when you're not in the situation. I imagine a lot of people who say they wouldn't, actually either would or he strongly tempted to if it ever happened.

I honestly don't know what I'd do. If DH was a child murderer and I knew then no I wouldn't, I believe I'd instantly lose all feeling for him anyway and it wouldn't be a hard decision.

But who knows what I'd do in less extreme circumstances.

Yet in her tv interviews in the immediate aftermath, she was referring to Jessica in the past tense: “She was a lovely girl” hmm

I don’t think that proves anything beyond the fact that her subconscious thought they were dead. I, and I’m sure others, thought they had come to very serious harm almost immediately.

No, I know it doesn’t prove anything, Butchy, just casts a doubt. What I meant was there is evidence that she MAY have known.

She was spectacularly stupid, insensitive and crass to speak about the children as if they were dead, though, when the rest of he community were out searching for them and hoping and presuming they were still alive; particularly their poor devastated families.

I'd probably give my partner an alibi, knowing her as well as I do. I might push her to hand herself in though, depending on what she'd done. There is no coming back from some crimes.

I think I probably would. It depends whether he was guilty or not (obviously).

If he was, it depends what he'd done, why, what the evidence against him was, what the punishment was likely to be, and how likely I was to be caught out.

I saw a recent documentary in the Soham murders in which someone from investigative team said Maxine was as evil as Huntley because absolutely knew what he had done and covered for him. That TV interview was damning wasn't it?

I don't think I would unless one of our DC was involved (as others have mentioned the Taken thing is far-fetched but if DH had been exacting revenge on someone who'd harmed our child and evaded justice I think I'd struggle to grass him up for that). For general criminal stuff he'd be out on his arse.

I'm an absolutely awful liar though,coupled with the fact that I instantly feel guilty if I so much as spot a police officer anywhere in the vicinity, so my alibi wouldn't be convincing. I could woman up though if I had to, to protect my partner/family if the situation justified it

I'm struggling to imagine my husband getting into a scenario where he wasn't either with someone else who could give him an alibi, or with me.

I guess I go away at the weekends sometimes, but even then, he usually spends his time lounging around the house producing all sorts of digital traces of his actions and presence (gaming logs, internet browsing and comments, Alexa requests). If he does go out it's to see someone, or to shops that have CCTV.

Regardless of the moral question then, there's the incredible unlikelihood of him innocently diverting from his routine in a way that also makes him untraceable.

It's quite different to my parents, who live rurally, and will leave no digital traces, and who spend a lot of their free time without any witness or evidence of their activity.

I don’t think I’d be able to.

Even if I wanted to give DH an alibi, I’m a terrible liar. I don’t think I’d be capable of a convincing alibi lie in a high stress situation.
I’d end up tripping myself up and contradicting myself or crumbling under cross examination and the whole thing would fall to pieces.

She was spectacularly stupid, insensitive and crass to speak about the children as if they were dead, though, when the rest of he community were out searching for them and hoping and presuming they were still alive; particularly their poor devastated families

But that’s what I mean, she probably didn’t even realise she’d done it, innocent or guilty.

If she were guilty, she definitely wouldn’t be consciously referring to them in the past tense for obvious reasons.

And if she were innocent, it’s unlikely she’d have consciously done it either. Her use of language was picked over because she and her partner ended up facing charges. But it may be that others who were interviewed did likewise and it went by unnoticed/uncommented on.

It was unfortunate but I wouldn’t call something that was probably done unconsciously in a high stress situation “stupid, insensitive and crass”.

Unless you think she did know, which some/a lot of people do think.

To be fair though, when I was a toddler I made my dad hide because I'd just seen the Railway Children and didn't want my dad taken away by the police. (he looked a lot like the father)

My mum had to explain to the uniformed men on the doorstep that he wasn't actually hiding behind the bed from them.

If she were guilty, she definitely wouldn’t be consciously referring to them in the past tense for obvious reasons.

If she had the intelligence and presence of mind to not do so to hide her (possible) guilt, then she should also have had the mental wherewithal not to say it as innocent comment.
Guilty people do make mistakes, that's why they get caught.

Again, I'm not saying she definitely knew.

Assuming I did know (or suspect) they did it, for some crimes I wouldn't provide an alibi for my DP/DCs, and would even actively report them myself.

OTOH, I can equally see situations where I would happily provide a false alibi for them. It's not black and white at all.

If she had the intelligence and presence of mind to not do so to hide her (possible) guilt, then she should also have had the mental wherewithal not to say it as innocent comment.

I didn’t say an innocent comment, I said subconscious, which one can’t really control. It wouldn’t have been a conscious choice to refer to them in the past tense, either way.

Guilty people do make mistakes, that's why they get caught

Yes, they do. I just don’t think her referring to them in the past tense is evidence of guilt or innocence here.

Hell no.

My mum had to explain to the uniformed men on the doorstep that he wasn't actually hiding behind the bed from them.

Were they actually there to arrest him?