To want my step mother to put a bit of effort into a small favour I'm doing her...?

[CarolineTheChemist]

Hello Mumsnetters!
I need your honest and brutal opinions...

A few months ago I moved into a beautiful old house and decided to make a new name sign for the front gate as the existing one was horrible. I paint as a hobby so I'm good with a paintbrush, and the old owners had kindly left some old bits of wood and a pot of black wood paint in the garage.

I spent ages looking for a font that I felt reflected the character of the house and it's quirky name. Once DH and I had chosen our favourite font, I painted an old plank black, stencilled the house name on the wood and filled it with white acrylic. Naturally as a painted I enjoyed this and got a lot of satisfaction when I hung it on the gate.

This weekend we had a house warming party and I got a lot of compliments on my new sign. My step mother asked me to make her one as she doesn't like their current one. One of my nearby neighbours drove past recently and later text me asking where I got it from, so I offered to make her one too.

I spent some time looking up fonts for both of them - they both have different style houses so I spent some time thinking about what might suit them, and gave them about 30/40 examples to choose their faves from. My step mother hasn't looked at the options I sent her, and instead has just replied saying she wants hers to be the same font as mine.

I don't feel okay about that. They live about 15 miles away so I guess it's not really a big deal, but I spent so much time choosing a font to reflect the character of our house that I don't like it that she's not putting in that effort for hers.

I glibly replied to her earlier saying she could only have that font if she could pick it out of the selection I sent her. Now I regret that as it could be seen as a bit childish.... When I agreed to make her one I didn't expect her to want the exact same thing as ours.

The question is am I being unreasonable in feeling irritated by this?

Perhaps a better analogy for some of you would be if you bought an outfit that you felt really good in and after seeing you in it, your mother/close friend asked you to go and buy her the exact same outfit... would you do it?

That's a terrible analogy and not even close to the situation!

Seriously, who's going to notice that they're the same font when she lives 16 miles away? She's not going to carry it with her and stand next to your sign!

I think your step mum was probably just trying to make the favour as little hassle as possible for you by choosing something the same as what you've already made. I wouldn't in a million years expect someone to be precious about it. You know that you don't own the font, right? It's someone else's design and is likely being used all over the world right at this minute. I think you need to make something more original before you are this precious about it.

I think the reason the op is getting such a pasting is because of her frankly condescending attitude.

Oh here let me spell it out for you less creative mortals. Have a dress analogy you non creative types. Seriously get tae fuck.

And the op is the ONLY person who saved to get a house. Clearly no one else understands this. Thanks for that context.

I work with designers who work up designs to my brief. If anyone turned up with 40 different fonts I'd think they'd gone mad. They wouldn't get the pitch let's put it that way...

Just told this to a friend who's a brand guardian (there's nothing she doesn't know about typefaces) and she thinks you're off your head. So it's got bugger all to do with the non creative people disagreeing with you.

But I'm sure there's some more context the op can add to invalidate everyone's opinions.

Have a dress analogy you non creative types. Seriously get tae fuck.

What a bizarre thread..Op you need to have some real problems in your life so that you get this into perspective.

@MyCatHatesEverybody Now I want to change my name to fontstealingbitch. Thanks for the lol.

FWIW OP, I feel your pain. But I know I can be a possessive person who also happens to to have an unreasonable attachment to certain fonts/typefaces. It would bother me too. If it is going to irritate you, why don't you make the sign in a font that is similar enough to yours to satisfy MIL, but dissimilar enough to not drive you batty? Chances are your MIL may not even notice.

you do realise that somebody made that font, you just chose it? It's not as if you have invented that particular style of writing so you can't tell other people not to choose it. There will be many people who will be using it so why not you MIL? On the other hand I do think she will be fine with whatever you make. Tell her that if you can't do it exactly the same as it wont reflect the character of her house but you can design something that you feel would suit her house.

I think I’m with the op here actually.
I wouldn’t like someone copying anything of mine. Especially something I had spent a long time getting just right ( not remotely artistic btw).
I’d make her one similar to yours but not the same.

As a artist designer myself lol 😂 I would never show anyone 40 fonts jeez I just did a image for a prosthetic arm which involved font. I gave them 3 options to choose from and kept two back Incase they hated those three. So technically 5 options no one ever needs so maybe options especially if they are not artistic.

Give her 3 options of font with one similar to yours. She will most likely choose something different.

Just do the sign in a different font, if it looks good she'll be thrilled and wont even notice!

"My timber, tile and brick baby"

Oh dear...

How on earth did this mind numbingly boring post get 239 comments?

Honestly, I think you might have too much time on your hands.

Just surprise her with a font that you like. I think she'll love it. Specially if you say that you chose it with a lot of care and attention.
I do understand how you feel so just make something else I'm sure it's going to be very nice.

But she liked the sign the OP made.
Not a completely different one.

This is the most baffling thread I think I have ever read. It must be because I am a mundane.