To say FIL doesn't own a third of our house?

[winnie765]

We bought out first house earlier this year with a 30% deposit of approx £100k. Of this, FIL gifted dh &30k. He declared it was a gift in the paperwork during the process and his name is not on the deeds.

But he keeps saying things like 'I own a third of this house' and if it was sold in the future it would need to be divided three ways. He's even talking about getting us to sign something so he will get his money if we decide to sell and move.

AIBU to think this isn't quite right?

What a dick! Of course he doesn't own any of the house -- it was a gift. Don't sign anything.

If you ever felt morally obliged to give him something back, give him the exact amount he put in (perhaps with a bit of interest if you are feeling magnanimous).

Also, £30k of a £100k deposit isn't a third of the house. It's 30% of the DEPOSIT. I presume you're making the mortgage payments, and that your equity is therefore also increasing that way.

Is he being passive aggressive because he doesn’t think you are being appreciative enough?

I have a total pain of a relative who stamps their own generosity on everything, ‘oh I gave you that’ ‘they wouldn’t have that house unless I helped them’ ‘that’s the dress / hair slide / tea towel that I bought her” etc about every single minor stocking filler of a Christmas Present . It is tiresome and controlling.

However, you decided on the brief information given that the OP is gross and trying to rip off a poor hard done by elderly relative??

Well exactly - there is no evidence from the OP that he is panicking or elderly. He. could easily be the forty-something parent of a young couple in their 20s. There is nothing in the OP to suggest any kind of panic as opposed to manipulation or badgering. We don't know either way what was in. FiL's head.

I didn't say the OP was gross btw

No you said she's "a cunt" on the basis of your fabricated backstory of some helpless elderly man despite there being no evidence of this. It could just as easily being the FiL who is a manipulative bastard using money to control family.

Regardless of what he signed what was the agreement between you when he gave it to you? Did he say, gift or loan?

As stated previously I feel that you need to decide what is morally right. Also I agree with the PP who suggested that you should be careful about totally upsetting FIL as surely you don’t want to have a huge family rift —and to be disinherited in the longer term—!

oh yeah, I missed that... the FIL thinks that giving you 30% of the deposit means he has a claim on 30% of the whole property :o
he's just thick, dont worry about him

Suggest he seeks a gp appointment if he thinks 30 k = 1/3 of a house. He is losing his marbles clearly..

Whatever you think about this OP, I agree with some pps, that you MUST get legal advice BEFORE speaking to FIL, so you know exactly where you stand legally.