To ask out the headmaster?

[brotown]

Ds has a week left in the school.
No idea if he's got a girlfriend
I dreamt about him and can't stop thinking about him.

I'm picturing one of the dads suddenly asking one of the female teachers out while on school premises. I honestly don't think it would be received very well at all and would be all around the staff-room in no time. (even if it's on the last day: teachers get together for meetings at school during the holls.)

The note idea is the least worst way to go about it. At least you're not technically putting him on the spot at work. I still wouldn't though.

@Laiste we knew which teachers fancied which when I was at secondary school. We saw the private moments, the ruffling of the hair of the smelly science teacher by the French teacher, the Humanities teacher taking out the English teacher in his little red sports car. And this was all term time!

It’s really not appropriate for OP to ask HM out when her son is leaving forever.

People seem to berating OP because they would never have the guts to do this themselves (me included).

I don't think I'm a pearl clutching prude because I don't think it's a good idea regardless of her son leaving the school. And I still think that no matter how many times that fact is shouted.

Why isn’t it a good idea? The pearl clutchers can’t articulate why it seems.

I’ve explained numerous times why it’s not a good idea, so have other posters.

Lots of people have “articulated why”, don’t be silly. And nobody’s clutching pearls either, ffs

As I said I object to being called a pearl clutcher . Lazy to resort to insults.

I think it puts him in an awkward position proefessionally. I've said so. It breaches boundaries.

So your concern is for the headteacher nosauce ?

In which case I honestly think you should give him more credit. Heads navigate much trickier situations than being asked out. On a daily basis. If the governing body don't permit relationships between parents and staff I'm sure he will politely let the OP know.

Some posters love nothing better than a thread like this, they encourage the OP to make a move saying things like, you won’t regret or do it what’ve you got to lose!!! It’s more for their entertainment rather the well being of the OP. All very Take A Break.

This is a real human being that’s already suffered greatly, people should bear that in mind before willing her to ask this headteacher out for their own amusement.

If the OP genuinely thought it was all fine and dandy to ask him out she wouldn't have asked for opinions. So logically she must be part 'pearl clutcher' as well. What ever the hell that even is

Maybe those who are puzzled about why anyone would feel awkward doing it could ask the OP herself?

I seriously don't understand what boundaries it breaches.

The OPs son will no longer be a pupil at the school. The OP and headteacher never have to see each other again so the "professional relationship" if you can call it that will have ended. There is no obligation to do anything from either party. He can say no thank you, he can say yes or he can say he is taken.

It is hardly a terribly difficult situation to navigate! Especially if the OP does it via note as mentioned before. He wouldn't even have to acknowledge it if he chooses not to as HE WILL NOT SEE THE OP AGAIN.

Maybe they're really good for each other. Maybe it's not meant to be. But FGS there's nothing wrong in giving it a go!

@NoSauce

I was referring to ilovesooty because I couldn’t see that she had posted anything apart from ‘it’s not a good idea’.

You did post a reason:

As I said earlier if he was already interested in the OP I guess he would have made this known to her.

So it’s ok for him to express an interest in OP but not OP to express an interest in him? That sounds horribly sexist.

As I said shouting isn't going to change my opinion. If you don't believe it breaches boundaries I'm not going to explain in a futile attempt to change other people's viewpoints either.

Maybe those who are puzzled about why anyone would feel awkward doing it could ask the OP herself?

No one has puzzled about why anyone would feel awkward about it have they Laiste? Can you quote? People have said it’s fine to do it, not pushing OP to do it.

I’m with zzzap on this one. What has OP got to lose?! She’s never going to see him again, so no future embarrassment if he declines or ignores.

@ilovesooty it’s a shame you see a discussion as ‘shouting’

@SagAloojah have the capital letters in previous posts escaped your notice?

Is the ds is leaving soon, surely they can date then? What are the rules?

I too don't know the rules and don't understand what 'boundaries it breeches'?

So it’s ok for him to express an interest in OP but not OP to express an interest in him? That sounds horribly sexist

No I don’t think it would have been ok for him to express an interest but given that the OP said she thinks he would be very shocked if she did ask him out I perceive this as him not being interested in the OP in a romantic capacity.

Go for it!

OP you literally have nothing to lose, unless the headteacher publicly humiliates you for taking the risk, which seems unlikely.
I would do the note thing with your mobile number. If you never hear back then at worst you are disappointed but never have to wonder what if.
Taking risks is how relationships are formed isn't it?

"unable to date a parent of/a student, or parent of/past student who left within the previous 5 years."

Oh. Ok. 5 years?
Shame.

@ilovesooty you just repeated the point about shouting so I inferred you were taking about later posts too

And those posters were posting in caps not to change people’s minds but to re-iterate the point lost on a few people that the DS is leaving school forever.

SagAloojah - No one has puzzled about why anyone would feel awkward about it have they Laiste? Can you quote?

Yes; you yourself! You asked straight you why it isn't a good idea and your use of the phrase ''pearl clutching'' for those who do gives away how you feel.

'' SagAloojah Tue 16-Jul-19 14:10:30 Why isn’t it a good idea? The pearl clutchers can’t articulate why it seems.