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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I’ve done everything I could...right?

188 replies

hmga90 · 08/07/2019 00:34

Something awful happened today- cat darted out in front of my car out of a garden on to a main road. Absolutely nothing I could do. If I swerved I would of hit the car coming in the other direction and naturally (as sad as it is/sounds) in that split second I would of rather harmed the cat then another human being or myself.

Anyway went and knocked on the door of the house the garden the cat came out of, and left the cat under a hedge covered by a blanket. Nobody answered the door, so posted a note explaining what had happened, apologising and left my number in case they wanted to contact me.

I’ve been inundated all night with abusive texts messages- how I’ve broken 3 children’s hearts, they will hunt me down and “slice me”. At least 20 of them, and countless phone calls off an unknown number. I’ve texted the number again expressing my apologises but that the messages are being taken seriously and will be reported to the police if they continue.

They are still texting to this moment- another has come through as I am typing this thread.

AIBU I’m ringing the police? I understand they are upset but surely this is extreme?

OP posts:
onegiftedgal · 09/07/2019 19:15

Yes, definitely call the police and back up all of their texts as evidence. I'm surprised though that you even left your number - did you think they were going to thank you? Your note explaining the situation was sufficient.
It's a cat which they have chosen to keep, living near a busy road and obviously are happy to just leave it unsupervised when they choose to go out.
You made the right choice and the right reaction. I'd run over the cat everytime rather than risk putting any other human being at danger. Think how bad it could have been if you'd hit another car.

gingergiraffe · 09/07/2019 19:21

An Alsatian dog ran out in front of me once in a Main Street. I braked but hit it. The dog ran off howling, so obviously injured. I got out of the car to try to find it or the owner and even enquired at a few shops to find the owner. I then reported it to the police and left my contact details. That the evening the owner phoned me. She apologised, thanked me for reporting it, said the dog was injured and she had taken it to the vet. Apparently it was a puppy and had escaped through a fence panel that a neighbour had removed. Luckily her expenses were covered by pet insurance and she kindly asked me if there was any damage to my car which would also be covered. Thankfully not.

Accidents happen and animals are unpredictable. It was not your fault but you acted responsibly and kindly. Such a shame that the cat’s owners did not appreciate your actions following the accident. I agree with others, phone the police and get it logged. You do not deserve to be targeted by these people. You are not required by law to report a cat accident but you chose to do so and repercussions are not acceptable. Actually suffering the trauma of killing an animal is bad enough. Poor you too.

Rivkka · 09/07/2019 19:24

You did all you could. Report to police then block.

butteryellow · 09/07/2019 19:26

Under uk law, you now have to report the incident to the police anyway

Not cats. Dogs, cows etc. ie animals that their owners are supposed to have under control/contained. But cats are allowed to roam - they're free agents and their owners aren't responsible for their actions, so they're not reportable.

Bob5 · 09/07/2019 19:28

They still at it OP?

LondonJax · 09/07/2019 19:28

There are a few people on here saying you should be able to brake for an animal in the same way you do for a human. But the difference between small animals (like cats) running in the road and human beings is that people tend to go across the car - animals run under them, between the wheels.

Last week we were travelling down a small country road near us. A rabbit shot out in front. DH braked as it was about a foot or two in front of us. But we couldn't see the rabbit on the other side of the road. DH got out, convinced he would see it in the road. It was, but behind the car. It must have gone between the front wheels, then out at the back. If the cat had gone between the front wheels but misjudged the back wheels as the brakes went on and it panicked there's not much you can do.

Most humans don't tend to charge between the wheels of a moving car - animals do, it's instinct to try to get out of the way.

RonnieScotts · 09/07/2019 19:38

I think you're going to have to change your number OP

Pondlife87 · 09/07/2019 19:51

Wow what horrible people. When my cat got knocked over the person who knocked them over just drove off. My half alive cat was found hiding in the bushes luckily by a neighbour. I always said I never blamed the driver as I know things happen, but I wish they had stopped to give the cat and owner the respect that was deserved. You did the right thing...unfortunately there are just some awful people in this world who can't see you were just a good person who a bad thing happened to, and you tried to make it right as much as you could. Hugs x

MeandT · 09/07/2019 20:10

3 years ago, a driver swerved to avoid a cat in front of our house, mounted the pavement as a result, knocked down our front wall (garden, not house, fortunately), wrote off her car and necessitated a trip to hospital for her and her toddler in the back seat. OP, you did the right thing in the circumstances and I hope the police have some time to support you in avoiding the abuse you have unfairly received as a result.

ToftyAC · 09/07/2019 20:30

Jesus wept! It was a bloody accident. WTF is wrong with people? Our last cat literally got eaten by the neighbour’s Alsatian. They were mortified, caught our cat took her the vets and paid all her bills as well as the cremation fees. We never once blamed them or were shirty. We could see they were terribly upset. I’ve not rtft but if you haven’t already, call 101. Some people are just insane.

celebrityskin · 09/07/2019 20:55

What horrid people. You have done the right thing and been honest and kind. They may be grieving but this is harassment. If it continues tomorrow call 101 and take police advice. Sending lots of hugs for an emotional and stressful day for you xxxx

janj2301 · 09/07/2019 21:17

FROM GOV.UK
Report a car accident with an animal
You must stop and report the accident to the police if you hit any:

dogs
horses
cattle, eg cows
pigs
goats
sheep
donkeys and mules
You must do this as quickly as you can, whether the animal is killed or not

Apparently a private members bill is before parliament to include cats and deer

Isthisreallylife · 09/07/2019 21:32

Block their number if on your mobile and if your Landline is being abused and it’s not with BT (who will give you details on how to block unwelcome calls) then look in the manual for your phone handset and follow the instructions for the same.

AND PHONE THE POLICE IMMEDIATELY!

You have done all you can. Their behaviour is reprehensible. I have 4 cats and I love each one dearly, if one of them died in these circumstances I would be eternally grateful for treatment such as you have meted out. You are to be commended not rebuked.
x

CaptainNelson · 09/07/2019 21:32

cattle, eg cows
Grin Is this because people don't know what cattle are? I think if you hit a bull, you'd bloody well know it...

manicmij · 09/07/2019 21:41

You had no obligation to do what you did. Contact the police, they are not only threatening you but commiting an offence under the Telecommunications Act. Do not hesitate.

wisteriablossom · 09/07/2019 22:43

You’ve obviously done everything you can. Some people wouldn’t have even got out the car let alone put the cat under the hedge, knocked the door and left a note.
Cats tend to dart out into the roads and sometimes there’s nothing anyone can do.
Ignore the texts and block the number.

wisteriablossom · 09/07/2019 22:58

@user1476013826
Poor woman is upset . She’s obviously done all she can. What would have been the point of taking the cat to the vets when it was already dead. At least she stopped , picked the cat up and knocked on the door , it’s more than some would do. I don’t suppose when she left her name and phone number she thought she would have a tirade of abuse from the owner . It’s unacceptable how the people are acting . Yes , people can be angry, but cats do have s tendency to run out into the road.
It’s upsetting for both parties.

wisteriablossom · 09/07/2019 23:02

@janj2301
I think if anybody hit a majority of those animals it would be more than the police people would be informing .

MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig · 09/07/2019 23:03

Everything alright Op?

Ginger1982 · 09/07/2019 23:06

God there are some weirdos posting on this thread.
Yes the OP shouldn't call the police to report serious threats of violence but should show some understanding for what the family are going through? Fuck off.

OVienna · 09/07/2019 23:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Oliversmumsarmy · 09/07/2019 23:13

I think my posts should be put into context.

We live on a tiny country lane (speed limit 30mph)

There have been several injuries (some badly injured) from drivers speeding. (No pavements)

The house facing up the road on the T. junction has had cars demolish the hedge/fence and plough into the house demolishing the wall and ending up in the living room on several occasions

The police won’t do anything until there are 3 deaths.

The 2nd death was nearby and they got left to bleed to death on the side of the road.

We have tried to get people to slow down but they come flying down the road.

People are going so fast they are losing control of their vehicles all on their own.

A while back there was an almighty crash.

We ran out into the road to find a van had demolished a telegraph pole and was spinning on its roof.

This is a road that is around 10 ft wide

Ginger1982 · 09/07/2019 23:17

@Oliversmumsarmy that must be a worry where you live, but you're being completely OTT and irrelevant in relation to the OP's situation.

rainbowunicorn · 09/07/2019 23:58

@Oliversmumsarmy There is not a single thing that you have written in your latest post that has anything to do with the situation that the OP is talking about. While it must be difficult to live there with people speeding it really is unfair to keep going on about it on this thread. The poor OP is obviously very shaken by what happened and then the messages and threats she was getting. I really don't think she needs to have posters trying to make her feel guilty for something that she could not have avoided.

WhentheRabbitsWentWild · 10/07/2019 00:04

Report them OP That is bang out of order .

I wish the person who ran two of my cats over had bothered to do what you done . It was a kind thing to do and the right thing.