This may be long, apologies.
I gave birth to my DD2, 2 weeks ago. I went to admissions when contractions were 4 in 10mins and I was in significant pain. The midwife was very rough with me, and triggered a panic attack when she examined me. She wouldn’t let DP in to the room as I had requested during the examination (?) She then informed me that I was not in labour at all as I was only 2cm, and suggested I was widely exaggerating my pain. I started crying at this stage, and got very panicked and upset, so she agreed to admit me to the antenatal ward until I had established labour. I asked would I have access to pain relief there and she assured me I could have gas and air and anything bar an epidural.
DD1 was back to back, and from the scans, so was DD2. During my labour with DD1, I was contracting continuously but was not dilating. I laboured like this in immense pain for 21 hours until I got to 3cm and they agreed to an epidural, and within 2 hours I had given birth.
When I got to the antenatal ward I asked for gas and air, and was told “you’re not in labour, you’ll get no pain relief here. I’ll run you a bath”. I explained what happened in my previous labour, and they just repeated again that I wasn’t in established labour as only 2cm. Now at this stage I was squealing the ward down in pain, begging for pain relief and was given 2 paracetamol. The midwives were visibly rolling their eyes at me and telling me to calm down. Every contraction was triggering another panic attack (I’d never experienced a panic attack until this day) and it got to the stage that I was pushing. I knew something wasn’t right but no one would listen. At 4pm I cried and begged for an epidural, so they examined me and said ok you’re 3cm now, we’ll see if delivery will accept you.
I arrived to delivery suite at 4.32pm and immediately requested an epidural. They hooked me up to foetal heart monitor and examined me and I was 9cm, so too late for epidural. Next thing, they hit the crash button and a consultant came running in. She explained to me that baby was extremely distressed and needed delivered, so she was going to manually remove the remaining cervix as I pushed. I was in agony. This didn’t work, so she started getting visibly distressed herself, calling out that theatre needed cleared out as this baby needed to be delivered. I consented to a c-section and just as we were about to go, my waters broke and she tried again and DD2 was delivered. After she had to be resuscitated but has made a fantastic recovery and we’re both doing great.
The consultant came back later that evening and explained that she came from an EMCS to me as my baby’s HR was at 60bpm for 8mins when it should be between 110-160 during labour. She explained that guidelines state that if foetal HR is lowered for more than 9mins it can be fatal, which is why it was essential that my baby was delivered ASAP. I am forever grateful to the midwives and doctors that helped deliver DD and save her life.
But I am so annoyed at the midwives at admissions and on antenatal ward who did not listen one bit to me, rolled their eyes, and refused me pain relief when I was so clearly distressed and telling them that I was in labour.
I have discussed this with my community midwife, who has suggested I request to talk to someone regarding my care and to get access to my green notes. But I don’t know what I would say. I have no grievance as DD and I are perfectly fine. But I just wish someone listened to me.
I guess I am asking WWYD? Would you request to speak to someone in the hospital? Or would you be thankful all worked out ok and take time to reflect yourself?