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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

... to ask about three things you think about every day?

338 replies

onmydoorstep · 06/07/2019 09:45

I've NCed for this. For some context I'm in early 50s, nice DH & kids, good position financially (but big mortgage), jobs, health OK, etc. Lots of pluses, and the usual stresses of work, some family stuff, and so on.

I find there are things that I think about almost everyday.

  • Parents: passed away over a year ago after long illnesses. I miss them so much, and think about them every day.
  • DS: has friends, popular socially but struggles in school, not very motivated at all. He also has some manageable health issues. I worry about him.
  • Sex (life passing me by?). My DH is great on so many levels, but his interested has decreased hugely in recent years. I just sense it feels like a chore for him, even when he makes the effort. I daydream a lot ...
OP posts:
FenellaMaxwell · 09/01/2020 06:50

Worry about my DS

Money

How fat and tired I am

Longdistance · 09/01/2020 06:50

  1. My df who passed away over two years ago.

  2. My dd as she struggles socially and I worry about her being lonely in school. Her teach is crap educationally this year, no motivational at all, can’t stand her.

  3. Money, or lack of it. I like my job, but it’s in a school, so rubbish money. I want to earn more but don’t have the childcare to cover holidays.

LakieLady · 09/01/2020 06:57
  1. My best friend for over 20 years, who died far too young (54) 22 years ago. I don't think I'll ever stop missing him.
  1. How much longer has my dog got? (14, deaf and can't see too well, but still seems happy)
  1. Will the bastard government move the pension age again before I reach it? (Currently August 2021 for me, 6 years later than it would have been before the changes)
Bickles · 09/01/2020 07:58

DS7- just how lovely he is, is he ok, things about his school, friends, activities, toys, health. Also my parents health.

Work- a jumble really to do with anxiety, hate one job (2 days), love the other (1 day). When will the mortgage be paid, can I change my work balance to do more of job I like but isn’t as well paid and has longer commute.

Holidays/ days out/ weekends away/ planning. How I relax- planning and researching our leisure time.

OneInEight · 09/01/2020 08:00

If I have sold anything on ebay; dh's poor health; ds2's poor mental health. I focus on the former as the only one I seem to have any control on.

Iwillgotothegym · 09/01/2020 08:07

One health problem or another

My grandmother who died many years ago but was an incredible person

My parents

lazylinguist · 09/01/2020 08:13

Weight/exercise/food (but I am taking steps to train myself out of thinking about this all the time!)

Language/words. It's my job. I teach languages and am learning another one. I'm constantly thinking about how to say various things in different languages and the differences between them.

Housework. I'm not very good at keeping on top of it, and constantly beat myself up about how lovely my house would look if I did. I don't live in squalor or anything - it just never looks like I want it to! What a rubbish thing to think about!

Obligatorync · 09/01/2020 08:17

Money. How to earn more. How to spend less. Fantasy spending.

Weight. I am losing it but worry a bit anyway.

The state of politics/the environment.

BillywigSting · 09/01/2020 08:18

Coffee, every morning, and how fucked I would be if I didn't have access to fresh coffee every day. How bloody expensive it is and how will I afford it if the price of it shoots up because of brexit.

Ds, how lovely he is and how proud I am of him. He's only 6 but he's a kind, thoughtful and very hard working kid.

Food and how I am going to feed everyone/afford to feed everyone.

So money, food and dc basically

ginandgingers92 · 09/01/2020 08:27

My family.
How tired I am.
Food.
🙈

kikisparks · 09/01/2020 08:34
  1. Infertility/ upcoming IVF
  1. All the animals being slaughtered every day :( and what positive impact I can make on this such as my volunteer work with a charity to mentor those who want to go vegan.
  1. My husband, great source of support and comfort.
JingleBelle27 · 09/01/2020 08:34
  1. My birth experience this summer with DS. Horrific. I had sepsis and was under GA for an EMCS. Plays on my mind every day how I struggled to bond with him afterwards.
  1. Money, we have enough, we pay all of our bills and have a tiny bit left over but nothing for an emergency etc. Aiming to pay off credit cards (stupid spending in youth) and build a little pot of money up over the next 2 years.
  1. My Nan. She was like my mum, my own mum was horrible. She passed away 8 years ago. I wish she was here to see DS. She would love him and be so helpful.
CheerfulMuddler · 09/01/2020 08:36

DH. I love him but he's not always easy to live with. Is he okay, is our marriage okay? (Not always, mostly.)

Housework and how messy my house is.

Do I spend too much time on the internet? (Yes.)

TBF, the first two are only when I'm at home/with DH.

CheerfulMuddler · 09/01/2020 08:40

Oh, and DS, how lovely he is, is he happy, how is he coping with school etc.

Funnyface1 · 09/01/2020 09:02

Money, always worry we won't have enough but in reality we are ok.

My health

How lucky I am to have dh and our 2 amazing dc.

BestBeforeYesterday · 09/01/2020 09:17
  • how I only have two years and 9.5 months to go until I can leave my job
  • how I struggle to have close yet serene relationships with anyone really. I am fucked up
  • DC3 - shall we? Shan't we?

I am envious of those who think about sex every day. I wish I did! I used to until I became a mum, nowadays my libido is shot.

caringiscreepy · 09/01/2020 10:25
  • the brain surgery I had in May
  • the fact that my anxiety has disappeared because of said surgery
  • my dcs happiness
QueenOfOversharing · 09/01/2020 11:22

My weight / my body - I'm at heaviest I've ever been & I hate myself. Trying so hard with diet, but ED and depression making it hard work.

How I don't want to leave the house, how I wish I got out more, how ppl saying "just force yourself" doesn't help.

Would my DS cope if something happened to me? We have NC with my ex & his family & very LC with mine.

minesagin37 · 09/01/2020 11:23

Which casino offers I should jump on to make the most profit( match betting)

My daughters. Especially the older one (20) who struggles with her mental health. She's not eating enough at uni.

My job. I'm always thinking what needs to be done. What should I do next? I'm a university lecturer.

silenceofthemams · 09/01/2020 11:28

Will I find another job before my insurance runs out.

Will I be able to have a future in the country I'm living in at the moment, and will it fuck up DS life if we have to make a life changing move after so many changes he's been through.

Is DS happy.

silenceofthemams · 09/01/2020 11:30

Oh and how do I get bloody paragraphs on the Android app version of Mumsnet 🤣🤣🤣

jimmyjab · 09/01/2020 14:40

My teeth and how I would love invisalign but can't afford it
DH - sometimes soppy thoughts, sometimes I'm planning his murder. Depends what kind of day it is.
DD - what she needs, how she's developing

Parsley65 · 09/01/2020 16:54

For me it's:
Will Dd pass her exams and be able to go to uni.
My Dad who's 92 and increasingly frail
Food - love the stuff! Am naturally greedy and losing weight, but get a bit obsessive Blush

thenewaveragebear1983 · 09/01/2020 17:02

Work and then that ricochets into stress and anxiety and worry.

Things that need done or would be nice to do to our house.

When/how/where I'm going to run, and more recently, my ongoing injury and how it's affecting my running.

And 4) food, diet, weight

OhioOhioOhio · 09/01/2020 17:04

My weight

My divorce

How I didn't know my husband was nasty.

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