To ask why some women don't attempt breastfeeding?

[Lottle]

Just being nosy. Perhaps too nosy....

Just wondered why some mums don't give breastfeeding a try. I totally get why people may not do it for long, just curious as to why some don't try at all.

One friend happened to mention (I didn't ask) "it wasn't for me" but I wasn't sure what that meant but of course I didn't probe, so probing you lot instead. Don't know if it's too cheeky to ask though!

Some awful comments on here.

Few of the hardened grim Old school 'STAPO' even popping up now.

'Why didn't you BF' threads always seem to bring out the BFers en masse.

Odd

Bloodyhell @Chocolateychocolate chemicals? Do you think formula would be one sale if its that bad for babies?

Here, 🥇 for you and all the other BF gang who look down on us who didn’t get your tits out.

I wasn’t interested. Plus I didn’t want to have a child who over the next year (or two) would never settle/sleep for anyone but me (as you see so much on here).

But I think the sensations that can be described as 'lovely' and 'bonding' can border on being construed as a little too enjoyable for the mum as well as the baby, and therefore get conflated with the sexual feelings we associate with our partners paying attention to our boobs

What a load of shit.

As some women prefer to keep their boobs just for themselves!

When I had my first child the midwife asked if I was planning to breastfeed and I said I wasnt keen on the idea but was willing to give it a try

She very sniffily said, if you're not absolutely committed, there's no point in trying. So I didn't

A year and a half later, in a different health authority, I said the same thing, and the midwife said, great.

I tried it. I was fine and I breastfed that child and my 2 subsequent children

I had not fancied te idea because I came from a family of bottle feeders and I had no experience I breasts being used for anything other than sexual pleasure, Nd it seemed weird.

But the second I tried it, it felt natural

Lots of parenting choices are the bare minimum. Breast feeding is the tiniest of choices I'd worry about. Too much screen time and processed meat alongside not enough veg,exercise and better future inducing study time/ reading are things I'd worry about far more.

Formula is bloody marvellous stuff.

DH fed dc those first 'chemicals' and she just thrived.

Watching my Best friend who also had dc late in life literally not leave the bedroom for the first month and crying with exhaustion attempting to BF was harrowing.

She FF dc2 from birth

My DC is about the healthiest, independent dc I know. No allergies, no ailments.

Her two BF cousins are both allergic to just about anything, can't eat a huge list of foods, and the one covered in psoriasis type skin disorder sadly too. One was BF until over two.

So glad we decided the route we took.

I think some people feel grossed out by having a baby sucking on their breasts

I HATE the feeling of my nipples being touched by anyone even my partner i have very sensitive breasts , I don't even like the feeling of shower water on them. For some reason I have breastfed for 4 months so far ... society is so pressurising and as my baby is gaining weight so well I feel I have no choice even though I don't like it

Why does it matter which method you chose? Both give babies a good start in life - there are many more issues which are going to impact onto their lives.

Haven't RTFT but YABU. It's none of your business.

"don't know why some people don't try. Surely it's what your breasts are FOR? Why would you rather stick a load of chemicals in your newborn's stomach?"
@Chocolateychocolate......because they don't want to. It's not absolutely terrible not to breastfeed you know. It's absolutely fine, and kids grow up absolutely fine, just the same as breastfed kids. As soon as they grow out of breastfeeding, they will have a lifetime of eating all sorts of stuff which will contain all sorts of stuff.

I was on medication.

I had very very bad mental health and needed to not be the "go to" person for feeding the baby for my own sanity.

I have sensory issues and struggled very badly with pregnancy. I couldn't cope with the thought of having a baby attached to me to prolong the experience.

Quite simply due to all these reasons and more I simply didn't want to and it's my choice.

I think formula is marvellous too. But it costs money...do they NHS want to be giving out formula at hospitals or would they prefer to make the woman 'pay' by 'encouraging' breast feeding? I dont see a problem with breast feeding at all. I just think the benefits have been exaggerated.
I would like to dispute the fact that breastfeeding is in fact free also , if you don't think a woman's time is worth anything then of course it is free. Or am I cynical?

Kaiylee Do your sensory issues affect any other part of parenting? Cuddling for example? I remember feeling so touched out after about 4 months, and they don’t stop touching you and stroking you for about 10 years it’s something no one told me about parenthood, how you’d never feel like you had any space

And I can't help noticing that the women that prefer to bf have a go at those who ff. those who ff are just doing what they want. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Breastfeeding isn’t free, unless, as you say catoney, you don’t place any value on a woman’s time. I don’t think the NHS care about the cost of a bit of formula in hospital though

Catoney exactly.

I actually like threads like this as it shows that formula feeders are not as much in the minority as breast feeders seem to think they are.

And Catoney since it's not THEIR child being formula fed, why do they give a shit?

I don’t think most people do give a shit. Just curious.

I’m sick to death of breastfeeding advocates being called ‘nazis’, pushers, how breastfeeding is disgusting, makes women feel sick, women only breastfeed past a certain age for their own enjoyment how we think we’re superior. If you DARE to suggest breastmilk is better then you’re torn to shreds. Told ‘fed is best’! Because woe betide you for making anyone using a bottle feel bad!

Women that breastfeed do come on these threads and support breastfeeding, because so often we are made to feel like shite because we did it and enjoyed it. But saying that means that you must believe that bottle feeders failed when that isn’t the case at all.

I still believe breast is best, and I will continue to support that belief until proven otherwise.

@MustardScreams no one can provide any scientific papers on this so really you're just giving your opinion and that is annoying for new parents because they are insecure. If you think breast is best then great , but don't push it on anyone else unless you can scientifically prove it.

Would anyone write such a science paper though? For what purpose? I mean I’m not searching for science papers and reading them all (can be many pages) plus not having subscription access to most, so you can see them. But also I don’t understand why anyone would write one- it wouldn’t get you a grant, or a research project. It’s just breast milk.

Mustard
There have been a number of posters on this thread who have called FF mothers lazy and selfish and who have made it clear that they consider themselves superior parents as FF clearly don’t have their children’s best interests at heart.

Those people are not helping encourage bf and bluntly deserve all the epithets thrown at them.

There are others who are bf advocates who have listened in a spirit of “what can we do to improve things” they are much more likely to engage people and encourage them than those who just plop judgmentally on the thread.