To wonder honestly what must go on in the minds of some men?

[VladmirsPoutine]

I've just taken my niece out for lunch. She's 16 and with the arrival of the weather she's been wearing a t-shirt and a mini skirt with her converse. Typical look for your typical teen but for just during lunch alone she was accosted by 2 different men who asked for her number. Both men clearly middle-aged and trying their luck. I admit she does look older than a teen but sheer audacity of these men hitting on a 16 year old girl really riled me.

This makes me feel sick. It used to happen to me even when I was in my school uniform. I looked like a 10 year old all through high school and sixth form college. I absolutely detest men.

MenuPlant I don't see what an adult splitting up with an adult because of the size of their breasts has to do with pedophilic middle age men making themselves feel good by sexually harassing children.

I think adults in the early stages of a relationship without children or financial commitments in common can split up for any or no particular reason. I split up with a couple of boyfriends early on in relationships back in my early 20s because their lack of punctuality annoyed me, and one just because he picked the salami off his pizza (though that was symptomatic of a general incompatibility over food, health and fitness, vanity and general fussiness). I think it's perfectly fine to split up for silly reasons if a relationship is newish etc. It is a bit weird to decide that something you could see before you got together is a reason to split up, I agree, like deciding someone's too short or too tall for your tastes after a while... It's been obvious from day one... But I suppose that you could have liked the person and hoped the physical attraction would grow but found that didn't happen...

What's weird with the breasts comment is stating it baldly as a reason for splitting up (a woman would never tell a boyfriend that she was dumping him because his penis was small even if, in brutal honesty, that was actually what the problem was!) and then compounding the lack of tact and diplomacy by going on to completely unnecessarily tell a future girlfriend that he'd split with someone over breast size - why mention that! Incredible lack of self awareness and appropriateness!

Happened to me from being 12/13 nevermind 16 but I did have big boobs on a small frame... Suppose this doesn't shock me, men do generally find younger women more attractive. I used to do 'escorting' from being 18-22 (though at 18 I looked 16!) and most of my 'clients' were middle aged middle class men I'm sorry to say. So this just doesn't surprise me at all. I'm shocked it surprises you tbh, maybe some women don't ever get a lot of male attention but this used to happen to me all the time. I'm 28 and still get much older men looking at me, smiling at me etc!

Oh yes when I was 16 in holiday in LA, walking on Hollywood beulevard and this old gangster type was proper checking my arse out sat on the sidewalk, my dad wanted to floor him! Mum used to get really upset when I'd get leered at when I was like 12 out shopping. There are a ton of pervs out there that's for sure lol!!

Lucky Amy very true. When I was an 'escort' when I was 18 my friend from schools dad turned up, he was in his 60s!he was a kind, lovely respectful man who is dead now, he came regularly. It's true many women are very naive about this stuff.

It’s a pity this discussion can’t proceed without various people with sleazy agendas invading it, isn’t it?

I have never been an escort or anything like that and I don’t want to say too much but I have seen first hand a part of the sex industry and I’m sorry but it’s true. The sheer number of married men who cheat, and who go for young girls even if they have daughters the same age is astounding. And they are among us! My experience makes me doubt even the seemingly good men around me because it’s just all too common I’m afraid. And like I said even if they aren’t acting on it I’ll bet it’s in their heads. I’m talking adoring grandads, men who’ve been married for 30/40 years, the loving family man. It’s horrible. So no I don’t think it’s a few here and there, just because someone doesn’t seem the type, doesn’t make it true.

I don't have an agenda this is the first time I've mentioned it on mumsnet because it is actually relevant to the topic.

Yes it's all true Lucky. I've got a lot of tales!

If we all call them out, give them evil stares if they are in vehicles, empower our DDs to tell them to fuck, teach our boys to show respect, we might get somewhere in the future.
My DD is nearly 11, very tall slim but very vulnerable and naive, I am glad I am here to protect her.
It is the young girl's without supportive families who are prey to these men.

2eternities I doubt it was you a pp was suggesting had a sleazy agenda, more likely to be Randyraver, and possibly dadshere

I don't have an agenda this is the first time I've mentioned it on mumsnet
I don't think the comment was to you, I can't be sure.
Your post were relevant to the thread, thanks for sharing it, lots of women think never my Father Brother or Husband, never say never when it comes to an opportunity we never know.

The vulnerable young girls are the worry. The ones in care for instance.

When I was 19, I worked in this massage parlour in Greater Manchester, higher end place not any drug addicts working there. One shift I was alongside this 43 year old scouser and almost every client would choose me except this one who always came in and chose her saying to reception I reminded him of his daughter and was too young. But mostly, young looking 19year old me was chosen. One guy chose me then asked me why she was working there as she was too old! He was around the same age maybe a few years older than her!!

Or those advertising as sugar babies.

Yes it's all true Lucky. I've got a lot of tales I bet!!

Thanks, yes my later child hood wasn't too great I was in care a short time in my teens and did end up sexually exploited at that time, probably how I ended up in that line of work.

Emerald yes they do, most clients were as I said respectable friendly middle class men, a lot would tell you about their wives and families! Rates wernt cheap (over £100 an hour) so it stands to reason it's mostly the financially stable who can afford it. They'd often come on their work lunch break or after work which was one of the busiest times.

Rates wernt cheap (over £100 an hour)
I bet the cost just added to their power trip to justify it. Idiots
At least in a parlour it was safer for you.
I am sorry you have had a tough time during your teens.

This thread makes grim reading

Shudder

It is disgusting. I remember being catcalled repeatedly as a teenager when wearing my school uniform by older men. The most I ever got make attention was when I was under 18! But when you are young you will shy away from it and accept it as what it is.

A few years ago now, a man at my bus stop was harrassing a teenager for her number and telling her how beautiful she was ect - she was in school uniform and looked so uncomfortable but no one around her even said anything! Just kept quiet and allowed him to continue. When I told him to back off from her (i was becoming incredibly angry and annoyed by this point) he gave me a tirade of abuse and told me to mind my own damn business. I informed him she was still a child and that I would happily call the police now as he is harrassing a minor, he soon backed off and walked away but not before calling me a bitch! Poor girl just smiled at me when he left.

From about 8 I got a lot of comments. I was an early developer and without sounding too up myself I am conventionally attractive. I couldn’t leave the house without getting at least 3 or 4 men leering at me. I remember once I walked past a group of work men and one of them shouted at me to get my tits out whilst his friend made wanting gestures. I told them I was only 16 and they just said ‘at least you’re legal’.

I still get stuff like this now and I’m heavily pregnant. As much as I’ll be happy whatever the sex of my baby, I do worry about the life my little girl will have if I have one.

'I'm shocked it surprises you tbh, maybe some women don't ever get a lot of male attention'

Yes a lack of male attention is quite obviously what this thread demonstrates!

More street harassment please, men! We don't get enough at the moment

It would also be cool if you could start younger, DD is 9 and it's started, why so old? It seems wrong that she had to live without precious male sexual attention for the first 8 years of her life.

At 16 she's already learning to appease men so they don't get aggressive towards her

She shouldn’t have to deal with this. But I got this day in day out from 11years old & I do not appease.
I am notoriously horrible to these men. My friends think it’s hilarious, but no fucks given. If they want to be pigs they can be called pigs. If they want to get aggressive they can deal with that shit whilst in the nick.
It’s the only thing that’s going to deter them from doing it to the next female that may not be as feisty as I am, or indeed, more vulnerable.

Why aren't some of those plenty of men who don't do this not speaking out against it? Why are they keeping quiet when they know other men are treating/have treated their mothers, sisters, aunts, wives, girlfriends, nieces, daughters like this?

^

This, really? Why not? They just allow it to continue... And I don't know why