To feel envious of people that can afford holidays?

[Ella1980]

I'm a full-time TA and my fiancé works in social care ft. Just feel so sad that we can't afford to take the kids away. Ex earns £105k+ pa so at least they'll get a holiday with him. Anybody else in a similar position? It just feels so unfair but I feel selfish for feeling jealous of not getting a break with the family 😢

MyDcAreMarvel I have 3, sorry I should have mentioned that

If he's happy with the current finical set up and it's you with the children and who wants the holiday, and that you have a lot of AL the onus is on you to source another income.
During holiday time could you get a bar job. They usually recruit during school holiday periods.

Our family is on a lower income (especially compared so some MNS) we book a year in advanced for our holiday through sunshine.com it's £1 deposit and has to be payed 2 weeks before you go, so for our last holiday to salou for 5 days we payed I think £40 odd a month, it's the only way we could go on holiday

Could you start up your own small business to do from home and use that money towards a holiday? You could get a reasonably priced self catering family holiday from somewhere like Thomas Cook or OnTheBeach.

A friend of mine runs a holiday childcare club; would something like that be an option for you as you have school holidays off? She caters for 4 to 12 year olds, so no toddlers or babies to worry about, and earns well from it.

Other ideas:

Ebay/Depop/Vinted selling items from charity shops and boot fairs
Dog walking
Pet sitting
Cleaning

Aw thanks so much, all. I'm definitely going to look into some of these suggestions. I do wonder if I should suggest to my ex he had the kids more as he has the money? They're not really happy when they're with him as he has a very unstable relationship with his much younger unemployed gf, but at least he has the money to buy them nice things and holidays etc.

Cherylshaw I'm going to look at that, how was the holiday itself?

Oh Ella, don't do that, having more money means bugger all, why would you do that to them?

One day I'd love to take the kids abroad but I know I'll never be able to due to ex!

@PJMasksGhekko I just want what's best for them and I don't think I can afford to give it to them. I often think they'd be better with their dad ft x

Have you looked at The Sun holidays? My cousin has booked to go away in August for £120.

OP After reading your last post I think you need to snap out of it. You said yourself that your kids aren't happy with ex. I bet they don't care half as much as you do about holidays and material things.
Others have made good suggestions. With a teaching qualification you could be looking to progress. Have you looked at inclusion managers, mentoring roles, family workers, sen jobs in LA's. Not sure what area you're in but where I am (SE) there are loads of those types of jobs around.

You probably can. You just aren't prioritising it.

We have a very low income, but breaks have always been a priority to me. This year it's a week in a premier Inn near London (£240 for the week ))

Other breaks have been air B&B or last minute deals. Preferably near a city where there's plenty of.choice and loads to do for free.

Downside is I barely have any clothes and very little in terms of material goods but can't have everything. 💁

Money isn’t everything Ella.

Thank you so much. Fiancé can't take any holiday in August as all booked 😢

Well if they aren't happy at their Dad's then that isn't the best for them, he might have money but he's obviously doing something wrong if they aren't happy.

Hi OP!
I'm a single parent, teacher and on benefits.
Have a look at the loveholidays website. I booked a holiday through them and paid in instalments over the course of a year which I have found much more doable. £880 for 5 days for 1 adult and 2 children in Spain :) would you be able to do it if you spread the cost?

Your ex can’t be taking the children on expensive holidays given he won’t take them on a plane?

You sound like you’re wallowing in self pity and rolling out excuses. Own your life. What’s your ex got to do with it? How’s it his fault your partner doesn’t earn as much?

You have the kids 50% of the time and work 37 hours a week, study do a course. Something to improve your position.

Last holiday was 7 years ago, pre divorce. I'd like to go at least somewhere, even for a weekend - but sadly not at the moment.

He never wanted them, it was all about revenge because I left him and stood up ro to his abuse. His last words to me were "I will leave you penniless, bitch". He did!

We can't go abroad sadly.

Understand your anger wrt the ex .

I can understand you not wanting to go back to teaching, but there are other jobs between teaching and being a TA . I would think that most office jobs are better paid than TAs are and you must have a degree to have done the teaching.

I'm in the same boat op. I just don't understand how so many people afford holidays. It does get me down.

So your joint income is around 30k? And you only have kids every other week? Not to be mean but I think you just need to prioritise holidays of that's what you want. A travellodge is £29 a night. Its doesn't have to be a week. Or like people have mentioned sun holidays are cheap get one near the beach and that's it all you would do is spend your usual shopping budget plus a little bit for ice lollys and buckets.

In the nicest possible way, you need to:
a) get out of working in schools
b) stop feeling sorry for the consequences of your own choices.

To explain these remarks, I too am an ex-teacher and there is a whole world of things to do out there that could potentially utilise your skills and experience. I was out of work for a while and it was fucking hard, I get that, but there really are other jobs out there - what about children's social care? SEND? Civil service? You don't have to stay hanging around in schools forever.

You are woefully underpaid as a TA - this is something that you could do with a L2 or L3 qualification, not as an experienced teacher. You don't work 'full time' - you are losing money due to the pro-rata nature of the role. Yes, you do a great job and the school probably love you - but they would, wouldn't they!

You chose to start a relationship with someone on a low wage. I am sure he's a lovely guy, but not having much money was the consequence of that choice.

You need to really think about the possibilities that are open to you rather than talking about giving your children more to your ex, just because he has more money? You are their mother, ffs. They need you in all kinds of ways and they also need you to be grabbing life by the collar and making the most of it.

@PJMasksGhekko
The holiday was great it was an all inclusive type holiday but I think they are great for kids the amount my 2 eat we would be skint after the first day!
We had a couple of things we had to change on the booking before we went and they were really helpful and sorted it all for us, I can't recommend enough