AIBU To judge parents who refuse to pay their contribution to student maintenance loan at Uni?

[ThunderandPharoah]

Have got some friends who are not going to stump up for their parental contribution when their DD starts Uni this year. Can't help thinking that this is a pretty low thing to do as they are not exactly short of money. Would you judge?

But cheaper can still mean a big mortgage.

And here we have it! Marvel for full house. If you can't afford to pay to send your kids to uni, you shouldn't have had them! There you go.

Commuting costs, too. A lot. I have a friend who does it from Dunfermline in Fife to the outskirts of Edinburgh (the Gyle), not a far distance at all, but his train ticket is nearly £1300/annum.

But of course, 'you can commute' only works when you have childcare to do so. But, hey ho, you shouldn't be having kids if you can't afford to send them to uni.

I’ll probably be judged for this but I worked my way around the system in order to help my DCs through university. I reduced my hours at work so that I was getting more in tax credits. My DP (now DH) didn’t move in with me until the DCs had all graduated. My DCs all got maximum bursaries which helped them and didn’t cost me more financially. I helped my DCs choose suitable courses in cheap places and they avoided student accommodation because it was too expensive. It worked for us.

My children are funding themselves. They get the loan which covers halls and fees and work to feed themselves in term time.

It worked for us
Teaching your kids to arrange one's life to maximise benefits? No thank you, I rather teach my kids that they will get rewarded for investing their efforts in what they want to achieve and that nothing is as worthy as having control over your income rather than rely on benefits.

So DH and I are expected to:
Pay off our mortgage
save for our retirement
Save for some money to hopefully help our 3 get a foot on the property ladder.
Raise 3 kids and now stump up £5K a year so they can go to Uni.

They better start looking at jobs then.

My children are funding themselves.They get the loan which covers halls and fees and work to feed themselves in term time.

My children work to feed themselves and provide money for living expenses. The fees are paid but the maintenance loan (one Northern and one Southern unis) does not cover either of their hall fees. We are retired now and our income is below the 25k threshold but neither of them get the full (8k) maintenance loan.

If you go aged over 24, they can’t count your parents income, and you get full maximum everything!

It's just a loan at a relatively high rate of interest though so nothing great.

@dungeondragon15 that most students will never fully pay back so the amount borrowed has little bearing on them.

Jemimapuddleduckpancake when was it you were at uni? Just wondering if student finance has changed. My DS is at uni now, he gets the basic rate loan of around 3800, his accommodation alone has been £5600 a year. When you add living expenses on top of that there is no way a P/T job would make up the shortfall unless he could do loads of hours which he simply can't fit in. He's doing a science degree that involves him being in uni either in labs or lectures full time so would only have weekends free. We have topped up his rent and given him money for food, and he's worked full time in summer holidays to have a back up fund for clothes/social life.

My parents earned fairly well, so I got a middling amount of maintenance loan. They paid for my first year accommodation (cheapest available at my uni so about 4.5k) which I am grateful for, but was on my own after that. 5.5k loans meant that over the 4 years (including one where I dropped out so only got 1/3 the loan but had all the expenses) without having to dip into my summer earnings.

Life would certainly have been easier if they'd been willing to help me out at all, but I don't judge them for it - if I'd really needed money they would have helped me but instead I've learned to budget on my own.

And I am almost certainly never going to pay back my whole 56k loan.

Raise 3 kids and now stump up £5K a year so they can go to Uni.

You didn't have to have three kids. Many people don't because of the extra costs so if you do it is a bit much to complain about the cost. Anyway, if you really do earn good money then saving to give each child £5k a year shouldn't be a problem considering you have 18 years to do it.
Also, it seems a bit bizarre to prioritise saving money to help them buy a property over their education. Have you ever thought that if you actually pay the parental contribution of their maintenance costs they could get a better degree and job and pay for their own "foot on the ladder" when they are older.

We are retired now and our income is below the 25k threshold but neither of them get the full (8k) maintenance loan.

You can ask SLC to use the current tax year instead of the previous one in that case so they will be eligible for the full loan.

@Dungeondragon15 but we can afford 3. We receive no benefits. We can afford to save for a larger house so they can have space and we're then going to save for a holiday to America.

Uni is a choice. Not one that I am going to allow change my finical planning. I will of course help like my parents helped.
Buy the start of term shop. Send them some extra money now and again.

But this idea that they will get to chose what Uni they go to, chose to live in expensive halls, have 100% free rein over their finances but I'm still expected to send almost £500 per month.

Nope. Jog on.

As I said. I will inform them years in advance of what they can expect.

You can ask SLC to use the current tax year instead of the previous one in that case so they will be eligible for the full loan.

Nope. That's already with the current year adjustment forms.

Now, now, Contraception, should just return those kids because you didn't spend 18 years saving to pay for them to go to uni . Can't afford to send them to uni, don't have kids! I've heard it all now, along with family of 4 in 1-bed flat because saving to pay for them to go to uni is more important than living space

Also I would say getting on the property ladder is a hell of lot more important than wasting money on a degree that may never get used.
Especially when we live between two unis so they could stay home and Apprenticeships are a great option.

I'd love to know where all of these infinitely flexible part time jobs are and where we can find accommodation affordable on minimum loan?

My dds course changed each semester so her days off and hours at uni kept changing. Her rent in halls first year was £7000 . Second year, in a crummy room in a shared flat was over £5000. Her house in her final year is much further out so she'll either need her car or to pay travel costs into uni and is just under £5000. Her loan doesn't cover these rents. She's got a summer job, though it's zero hours so who knows how much paid work she will get.

Those saying do apprenticeships or just go straight into work - that's fine if there are apprenticeships within the jobs you want to do. Where are the apprenticeships to be teachers or nurses for example?

@dungeondragon15 that most students will never fully pay back so the amount borrowed has little bearing on them.

It's the tuition loan that may never get paid back as at the moment it is written off after a certain period of time. The maintenance loan has to be paid back (it is never written off)

Actually maybe that is wrong but I think they are changing the system so that it is never written off. They can also lower the thresholds for repayment etc,

Better degrees don’t mean higher wages, necessarily. And as you get older, many parents earn less than they did - due to redundancy, unemployment, ill health, death of spouse, etc. DH and I both went to the best universities in the country for our subjects and both got firsts. We’ve never earned more than 30k and DH now earns only 21k. We live in London. 30k was a decent wage at one time in London but nonexistent pay rises have deflated things.

Better degrees don’t mean higher wages, necessarily.

Obviously it is not automatic just as getting a degree in the first place doesn't mean a higher salary. I am sure there are people without GCSE earning more than people with degrees but that doesn't mean you wouldn't encourage your child to get GCSEs. That doesn't mean that there isn't a strong correlation though between a good degree and future salary.

@Dungeondragon15 but we can afford 3. We receive no benefits. We can afford to save for a larger house so they can have space and we're then going to save for a holiday to America.

So you can afford to give all three £5k a year but you just aren't going to. It is because of your high salary that they won't get a full maintenance loan and yet you think it is really great parenting not to make up the expected contribution. I used to feel really sorry for students with parents like you and still do.

But this idea that they will get to chose what Uni they go to, chose to live in expensive halls, have 100% free rein over their finances but I'm still expected to send almost £500 per month.

They would be able to do that if they have parents who are high earners though. It's not their fault that you earn over a certain amount.

They would be able to do that if they have parents who are high were lower earners though.

Well obviously a degree doesn't guarantee a better job BUT all the data suggests you're likely earn more, progress quicker and if you find yourself unemployed, be unemployed for less time than non-graduates.