Couples holding hands is really cheesy beyond the teenage years

[HamptonLucy]

I've been watching several episodes of Escape to the Country (please don't judge me too harshly). Almost all the couples clutch each others hands on the sofa and cling on to one another for dear life when they're trundling around the countryside with lovely Alistair, Nicki Chapman or Jules.

Do you think it's a bit cheesy? The Obamas, the Macrons, Harry & Meghan, the Clooneys - all serial offenders.

@HamptonLucy strangely I was there tonight having a drink 🥃

We hold hands a lot and are naturally very affectionate. I just think it is sweet, but don't judge people if they don't

I'm with you OP! escape to the country and the like are so cringy with the handholds. As if the other might make a bid for freedom given the opportunity. And who could blame them given the show they are on.

I am with my partner 30 years and occasionally would have a hand squeeze to convey an "i love you" but don't need to anchor him to me at any other time.

In fairness he would be more tactile than I and thinks the grabby couples on those programmes are entirely reasonable to keep a firm grip on each other . So, horses for courses!

We do it, it’s not a conscious thing just something we do sometimes. Not performative or trying to show off, just a little reassuring squeeze.

DM and DF held hands everywhere up until his death. They were married for almost 50 years. I never thought it unusual until friends commented on how lovely it was. I hold DH's hand or onto his arm. We've been married 24 years. It feels right but I've never given any thought that others might find it odd, not that I care. It's a weird thing to be bothered by.

I m long term single and always will be but I love seeing old couples hold hands and be affectionate. It s sweet especially in their 70s and beyond. My parents have been together 54 years. Yabu.

My grandparents still held hands in their 80's, they'd been married nearly 60 years!

I like holding hands with my DH, though we don't often do that, as we're often with our DDs, we're holding one of their hands instead. Holding each other's hands is something we do when we have time to ourselves, so that makes it special.

I also don't get why it bothers you.

There is nothing more beautiful than an elderly couple walking down the street holding hands

My DH and I hold hands on the sofa while we’re watching telly. We don’t always want to be wrapped around each other but sometimes it’s just nice to have that bit of contact without being too close. We also hold hands in the street.

Who are we hurting OP?

I think it’s nice. In public I’m not so fussed, but it’a something I’d find supportive or ‘grounding’, if that’s the right word, if I were out of my comfort zone. At home, in private it’s just a nice way to connect and makes me feel comfortable. Just a little touch to let you know they’re there.

My new partner hates holding hands, in any situation and it irks me a little but doesn’t stop me trying when we’re at home 😂

Nope I was walking hand in hand with my partner a few months back and I will always remember this elderly man saying to us to never stop holding hands... He started to tell us how he and his late wife met when they were really young and held hands until the day she died... it was really sweet story..

@Alsohuman My parents held hands in their 90s, brings a lump to my throat to think of it.

That just brought a lump to my throat. We all should be so lucky.

YABVVVU you joy snatcher! Long live the handholders.

Me & DP in our 50s we hold hands when strolling sometimes. & At times if we're sitting together at a social event too. Partly habit I suppose. But I don't think I'd like to be the person who sees couples holding hands and is waspish about it. Why would you even care, unless you are envious? Hold your partner's hand. Or not. Honestly (mostly anyway), nobody cares.

Some scientific studies have found real physical benefits to hand holding here

To summarise - an increase in oxytocin (the 'cuddle chemical') and corresponding reduction in anxiety, greater resistance to pain.

DH and I hold hands when we walk the dog. He instigates it....he must like it though it hampers me lol. I let him do it as it's one of those things which some people really enjoy. He doesn't do it when we're in town or anything....

@HamptonLucy does your husband just not like you?

@magimedi that is one of my favourite songs ever ever ever 💕

My parents didn't. My uncle and aunt did - I always thought it a bit cheesy. My dh loves to do it. I'm not opposed to it and it makes him happy. We've been through some outside challenges - health and stuff - so it was nice then to have a hand to hold in a tricky world.
I still do it. I'm in my 50s, he's in his 40s.

Jesus - all this emotive language! Couples holding hands are 'clinging'? Holding on for grim death? twining round one another?

No. They are just holding hands.

I imagine on Escape to the Country they are holding hands because they are out of their comfort zone, in front of cameras, being put on the spot, being told what to do/say/be. Who wouldn't want a bit of human contact and the comfort it brings to have moral and physical support?

Do you think OP that you could stroll nonchalantly about on camera, chatting easily about your homes wishlist (for stuff that others would think unnecessary or ridiculous) and not want your loved one next to you to hold onto?

Me and DP hold hands all the time when out. his hand automatically seeks out mine. My ExH, i didn't like holding his hand, so we didn't. Turns out I didn't like him much.

I never hold hands with my oh in public - I’m usually too busy trying to swot his hands away from my bottom (and I love it)

I think it's fine if it's based on genuine love and affection. Bit sad if it's fake tho.

YABU

DH and I mid forties and always hold hands, or we walk along with his arm around my shoulder, my arm around his waist. DH tells me he loves me all the time and vice versa. We are very loving and affectionate, you would hate us, OP

Would feel very sad if all of that stopped, would feel like we are mates and not romantically involved.

Let handholders be. Don't see what being cheesy has got to do with anything.