... to not tell my militantly vegan friend she ate fish sauce?

[Snuffalo]

I am a relaxed vegan, as are one of my kids, the other kid and my partner are mostly vegetarian. Basically what that means for me is that I would never spend my own money on animal products, and I wouldn't use them in my own cooking, but if someone else prepares food for me or I'm a guest in someone's home I'll eat what's put in front of me, for the most part - I won't have a sausage or a burger at your barbecue, but I'll eat the pasta salad even if has cheese in it, and I'll have some of your birthday cake even if it's made with eggs.

Anyway, my friend Alice- who is a militant, rather than a relaxed, vegan

• was over and I heated up what I confidently thought to be vegan sweet potato and black bean chilli that my partner had made earlier in the week. I know the recipe backwards and forwards because one of us makes it at least once a month with zero animal products so I had no reason to suspect otherwise. I must say it was especially delicious this time - because, as it turns out, my partner added some fish sauce because he'd read somewhere that it's good in chilli. I didn't find out until today and now I'm wondering if I should tell Alice? I can't decide if, in her shoes, I would want to know or not. Would you?

It is really important to be clear on what being vegan or vegetarian actually is, because then you don’t get offered fish or an omelette as the “vegetarian option” because a surprising number of people/restaurants still don’t know the bl*y difference. My ex-FIL after 5-10 years of regular visits still asked me if I eat fish every single time I went there (not as a joke). People like OP muddy the waters and make it harder for everyone who cares about what they eat in terms of animal products.

You're not Vegan. Your friend is, however. & That doesn't make her 'militant'. But there's no point telling her what happened. Unless you want to make her feel bad or don't want her friendship any longer, of course

PurpleDaisies

I don’t understand why you are calling yourself a vegan when you’re clearly not.

Me neither. There’s no such thing as a relaxed vegan or vegetarian you either are a vegetarian or vegan or you’re not.

As for your friend I wouldn’t tell her. It was a genuine mistake. Nothing gained by telling her.

I agree with the majority, don't tell her. I'm a vegetarian rather than vegan and I wouldn't want to know...

ZOMBIE THREAD