Ended up in the same club...

[junglesepa]

Hi,

My fiancée and I went out in London last night separately with friends. I went to a birthday party in a club, she had booked the space and area months ago. There's a Facebook invite etc. I said I was going to a club and never specified.

My fiancée went to an event and then a bar and had text me that. Then he text saying he was in the same club (I didn't check my phone) he didn't realise I was in there. I was talking to my friends at the bar when suddenly he was in front of me.

His friend looked disgusted (usually get on with this friend) that I was there.
Fiancée is angry because it looks like I followed him there.

The mix up was that they referred to the club as it's old name and I knew it by its new advertised name.

It's awkward but not the end of the world. He's acting very off with me and angry. Who is BU?

Married 32 years here. If I do see/bump into my OH unexpectedly when we are out and about then my heart still does a little jump of pleasure. That's what your OH should be feeling not "shit, there's OP".

Surely your fiancé would have been happy to see you?
I'd be worried that you had seemingly cramped their style and I'd be wondering what they had intended to do! Flirting at the very least I'd imagine.

Ah they were on the pull.

My fiancé and I ended up in the same club on our respective hen and stag dos. Do you know what happened...we all got drunk together and had a great time, laughed about the mixup and it's still a fun story 10 years later.

Your fiancé is a dick, as is his friend.

I'm sorry, OP, you will come to regret marrying this twat.

Maybe he was planning to meet somebody else for a little rendezvous!

Big red flag! Think carefully about what his behaviour and initial reaction is telling you about the type of person he is. This is who he is. Is it who you want/thought he was?

I've got a bit mixed up with 'he' and (possibly) 'she'. A fiancee is a woman.

His reaction is seriously weird. Surely he knows that your friend organised it and why would you be following him anyway? Do you honestly not have any form for this? If you are completely innocent of ever stalking/following/no trusting him I would reconsider your future as whatever is going on his and his friend's reaction is not normal.

You're at a stage in your relationship where if you bump into each other he should be over the moon to see you, not angry! Wtf!

Well if he didn’t want to go to the same place as you he should have referred to the club by the correct name, then you could’ve said oh that’s where I’m going. So he is being unfair over the mix up and completely unreasonable about seeing his financee by chance in a nightclub. And agree, guys do not have guy time in a club.

I don't like the sound of your partner, OP, or the company he keeps. I think you ought to think very, very carefully about marrying him. As others have said, it's normal to feel pleasure when you bump into your partner, not hostility.

My money's on the anger being that he was already getting 'somewhere' with a woman when he saw you at the bar (probably about to buy her another drink).

It was just a coincidence. He's being completely pathetic.

It's really weird of him to be so annoyed. It should be very obvious that you and your entire group of friends didn't spend your entire evening stalking him - why on earth would he even think that? Why wouldn't he just laugh say hi then go back to his group of friends.

He's a tosser.
Please get rid of him. You won't though.

Something similar happened with my ex about a year after we started going out. Won't go into the details but basically he was furious that I was there and behaved like a complete dick as did his friend. I should have dumped fuckwit ex then. Looking back I realize this was the point where I should have seen he was just messing around and wasn't serious about a long term relationship. I put up with 5 years of appalling behaviour from him. Him basically saying I was cramping his style (his style being trying to pick up women, random whatsapp flirtations with women and sleeping with prostitutes).

Your financee should be delighted to see you - no matter where or when - and should trust you enough not to assume you were stalking him and trying to be controlling.
Many men imply women are controlling when they want to shift blame for their own bad behaviour/guilty conscience onto someone else.
I think he and his mate were on the pull. Sorry but that's what it looks like.

I would also be suspicious that apparently you being in the same club ruined his evening plans.

"Guy time" at a loud nightclub? It's not like they'd be able to talk much...

I think its pretty clear he was on the pull with his mate.
You would be mad to ignore this huge red flag OP.

If I accidentally bumped into my husband on a night out I'd think it was hilarious, and I'd have been really pleased to see him. I'm not sure how I'd feel if the man I loved and who was meant to love me, would be pissed of to see me out of pure coincidence. Red flags are a'waving!

How old is he?

How utterly bizarre!

You did nothing wrong and I don't understand his reaction, it's been yonks since DH and I were out on seperate nights out together but I used to love bumping into him... he's the best on nights out.

This would ring warning bells, OP, what was he trying to hide/doing that he didn't want you to 'follow him'?

Agree with others, this happened to me with my ex and we broke up shortly after. Regardless of whether he's cheating or not at this moment, the fact that he was angry and felt you ruined his evening is the opposite of how you should feel when you bump into your fiancé unexpectedly.

Unless you somehow have a history of stalking him on nights out then I agree with pretty much everyone on here that a) why earth wouldn't he be pleased to bump into you and b) he was up to no good. Sorry.