To wonder why people have children when they clearly put their career first, by having a 24hr maternity nurse from day one and a full-time nanny from 3 months?

[gogetter]

Call me old fashioned but why bother when you are going to see your child for maybe an hour a day on weekdays?
It's not financially needed for mum to return to work (far from) so why leave your teeny weeny baby with a nanny during the most amazing time of their lifes?

A bit strange I fear!

no I would never wonder WHY they had kids

and if they were working wouldnt think about tit

its the mums that DONT work round here and still have a full tme nann ythat get me

why does the op assume that dads are around??? Old fashioned, yes

yes malfoy I know two mums that dont work, have fulltime nannies

one hsas a nanny AND an au pair -for 2 kids

takes them both on holiday

[faint]

but have realised it is just something taht a certain sector of society DO

so no point in getting worked up over it

to the OP
are you a tad jealous that they can afford this

no I dont think it is about jealousy

my mum says this regularly and she is ancient with no need for more money/kids

I think to some people it does seem utterly bizarre.

I hate this attitude !! Really hate it !!

We each make our own choices and it is not for anyone else to judge us !

expatinscotland

I understand where you are coming from, I hated having to leave my children. My husband and I had to do, what we had to do.

That being said, I actually remember hearing something on the news about working mothers, who are better parents because they appreciate and value the time spent with thier little ones more.

I definitely think that what is right for one person, is not necessarily right for another. Just because two people choose to raise thier children differently, doesn't make one of them wrong.

It's called a wife and most men in the UK shoudl therefore be locked up if that's your view.

But it's certainly not may view. We had nannies and 22 years on from the first I am still really enjoying the 8 year olds and working full time.

I worked through choice and because I believe it is better for children and we have all benefited from it and we both really enjoyed our time with the children when we weren't working.

It's those who stay home without career, without income, without contributing to this country in the way we need women to do, who show their children that women are there to serve and wipe bottoms and be subservient to men at home who damage the children of this country every single time they stay at home. It's about time they stopped. They owe it to other women to work full time.

oh change the record

presumabley oyu haev FEMALE nannies and THEY cna wipe arses?
btu mothers cNAT

mayeb if the dh paid the wife to change nappies is that ok
he can employ her?

mayeb if the dh paid the wife to change nappies is that ok
he can employ her?

Excuse me Xwnia, but that is the most unbelievable bullshit I have ever heard!
I am truly stunned that you could possibly put that forward as a level argument.

Xenia, lol, that would be going a bit far....sorry, I will work because that is what I either need to do or want I want to do, not because I owe it to womanhood or something like that....why sacrifice my own happiness....

cod has a great point about the female nannies

get round that one [rocks back on heels looking triumphant]

Xenia

I have finally, discovered the truth. You like to go as far the other way as possible . No, I really do remember hearing a news special that indicated that mothers who work value the time they spend with thier children more. And therefore are frequently better at parenting.

But I also think there is something to say for the mother who choses to stay home. It is a tough job, and it doesn't come with a paycheck.

Personally, I had the opportunity to quit working a couple years ago and I took it. However, I am furthing my education and do plan to return to the workplace when my daughter is a little older. And that will be my choice, my husband makes good money now.

ah but they are paid and working women, so therefore are not letting down society.

LOL.

The nannies that is!

xenia I choose to work for me and me alone
not me kids or hubby
but for my satisfaction

but what would i know i work in a low paid job
effing childcare

'it's not financially needed for mum to return to work (far from) so why leave your teeny weeny baby with a nanny during the most amazing time of their lifes?'

in my case because I need to finish a PhD and to interview for a job (which I was invited to apply for may I add, it was an opportunity I couldn't pass up) and give a new paper which I had to do from scratch. Because I've worked for a very long time for this and I don't really see why I should have to justify that choice, given that my husband doesn't have to justify his 14 hour a day job to anyone.

Oh and because my baby has been absolutely fine with his nanny (part time may I add- I have also committed the crime of working while looking after him 2 days a week- o the countless opportunities for stimulation which were probably missed....).

YABU. Live and let live.

Oh welcome to mumsnet gogetter.

I'll call you old fashioned all right. (have only read OP, bet I'm not the only one who said it, apologies for lack of originality)

Ok so the person in question is clearly not returning for work for financial reasons I think the BMW, jimmy choo's, massages weekly, private midwife, personal high flying designers decorating their house all point to the fact that it is not a financial decision.
Someone pointed out the literally pre-empting bearing a child into the waiting hands of a nanny. That's the bit I find disturbing plus the fact that the nanny has to give the parents a run down on how the baby likes to go to sleep....... also the reason for the 'mum' going/not going back to work would be purely based on a breast feeding perspective if this was the method, which I think would be a lot of peoples choice (although this is not a ff/bf debate)
I stand by me OP - and wouldn't do it myself but hey, it's their kid!! Also I completely respect if your financial situation is different from the example here then you may be forced to and I am not judging that scenario.
Oh also scoff at jealousy dig!! I'd like to know if my kid enjoyed their first swimming lesson and to be there when they first roll over!!

I choose not to work and I am very lucky that I don't have to.
I choose to have a nanny and she is fabulous.

The only people I owe anything to are my family and how I choose to balance that has got nothing to do with whether I wipe bottoms or do the ironing!

YOU CAN GET A MATERNITY NURSE????

why didn't any fecker tell me?

well if I won the big one on the lottery my kids would be quick smart enrolled at the nearest boarding school
so i could spend time buying jimmy choos