Sister annoyed as new DD name too similar to her DD

[Cantfindaname123]

DN is 5. I barely see Dsis and DN as we live quite far away (think 4 hour drive), so we only really see each other at christmases, weddings and finerals. DN is named Isabella.

Our DD (2 months) is called Arabella. I was aware that it is quite similar but nobody owns a name, it isn't even the same name anyway, and we barely see each other.
When we announced name Dsis was quite upset, we 'stole her child's name' etc.

It has now been almost 3 months and Dsis is still not talking to me, she's got DM on her side, DM keeps telling me how much I've upset my sister, and couldn't I have picked a different name blah blah.

AIBU to say I can call DD what I like, it isn't even the same name, and she can get a grip?

I think the names are both lovely but sufficiently different.

I have an Arabella, so I'm biased. We call her Bunny though, not sure where that came from!

She is totally unreasonable in terms of how she has reacted.

However, they are similar names and for many people probably too similar. Add in that you don't get on with your sister and I can see why she might react badly to the naming choice.

If you were my sister I'd just be glad i got in there first with Isabella and wasn't left with Arabella.

You knew this would rub your sister up the wrong way surely and why go with it when you know they will probably both be Bella.

don't get on with my sister at the best of times- deep rooted issues stemming from favouritism in childhood

I thought that might be the case because you do come across as very defensive on your opening post. And whilst everyone is correct that says you can call your DD what you like, the names may be different but are very very similar and I don't think you would have picked Arabella if you had a good relationship with your sister, there are 100s of other names. But you dont get on with her.

Arabella is beautiful.

Isabella reminds me of the old 'joke':

Knock knock, who's there? Isabella. Isabella who?

Isabella necessary on a bicycle.

Misses point of thread.......

I know sisters called Isabel and Annabel. That's odd but YANBU and I agree with you. I can call DD what I like, it isn't even the same name, and she can get a grip.

I was alway quite open about the fact that if I had a son I would call him Henry after my wonderful grandfather. I became pregnant a month after my step-brother's wife, and they, knowing that, called their son Henry. My Dad has subsequently divorced evil step-mother anyway so I guess I could have just gone with Henry anyway. But. WTF. It's a name. I am very happy with the name I chose in the end. (although was pissed off at the time)

It sounds like your sister is just looking for a reason to throw a tantrum as she doesn’t like you getting some attention for a change.

Ignore her and tell your ‘d’m you aren’t interested if she tries to guilt you. Either she stays out of it or you limit contact with her too. Just put the phone down/ leave if she’s starts on the subject.

It doesn’t sound like your sister is any real loss to your life.

Congratulations on your baby. Lovely name!

I think you should have chosen a different name, sorry. 5/8 letters the same in the same order is a lot

How utterly petty that a sister would stop talking to her sister who has a new baby, just because she’s pissed off at a name choice? It’s really worth creating a full-on family rift over? Siblings piss each other off all the time but to stop talking at what should be such a joyous time? There must be more to this than a name.

I love these threads. 😂 I have the same name as my sister, that’s when it gets weird.

They’re different names for cousins who live apart, absolutely no big deal

Seriously? They are 2 totally different names. I have 2 DNs with similar sounding names (both 4 syllables, both ending in an -ee sound although not spelt like that). I sometimes get them mixed up but everybody knows it's just because we have a lot of nieces and nephews and there's no harm meant when we get it wrong. It really shouldn't be causing any problems, you choose a name, it belongs to your child and I agree with you.

YOu say you don't get on with your sister so why perpetuate that by choosing a name so similar to her daughter's name?

Also your mother will have two granddaughters with very similar names. Odd for your parents.

Love the name Arabella - so ethereal! Not keen on Isabella - every other child seems to be called this or Ellie or Lily or ......

Well it’s not the same name, it’s only likely to be an issue if you both use Bella. I must admit it would have been too similar for me to use but it’s not the same name. Your sister and mum are being daft, do they expect you to change her name?

Every second child is called Bella YANBU

They are 2 totally different names
Apart from the the majority of each name being exactly the same...

Load of precious shite. Back in the day every second girl was a Mary and boys were all called John.

I think you should have chosen a different name.

I have a daughter who was born 9 months after DSIL’s daughter. They gave different sounding names but almost identical shortened versions which they use most of the time now. My daughter’s is just one extra letter on the front of her cousin’s shortened version (think Helen and Elena but as shortened versions).
They see each other a few times a year but are rarely in touch otherwise. They LOVE having similar names (although original full names don’t sound that similar so we never noticed until the girls chose to start shortening names). They put them both together and call themselves ‘the ... gang’ by putting bits of both names together. I’ve just checked with my DD and yes, she says it’s lovely.
In your case, OP, they are different names with potentially similar/same shortened version but it seems like your DSis and DM are looking to make problems.
Congratulations on the arrival of your daughter.

The names are very similar. If I were your sister I would just be bemused by your lack of imagination and relieved that it wasn't I that could be accused of copying rather than get angry though about it though. YABBU.

They are two different names. I wouldn’t even bat an eyelid if sisters had these names.

She’s being an idiot and needs to grow up.

Love the name Isabella (but the whole version, not too keen on Bella) makes me think if only we had a girl... 🤔

YANBU.

Your sister just having a hissy fit because the attention on you and not her.

My BIL inlaws told me I needed to change my middle child's name as SIL had named their child a similar name but wanted to use the same nickname as our DD. I just looked at her and asked if she was really telling me to change my 7 year old name just because her daughter couldn't find a different name to one that already in the family. Unfortunately the version of the name they chose is every where as Amazon gave the name to one of their devices.

Luckily they have moved to the other end of the country so we no longer have to see them.

Much Ado About Nothing.