To think no adult kids would agree to pay this!

[Cruelstepmother]

Just found this 'how much rent could you charge your kids' calculator! www.comparethemarket.com/home-insurance/content/pa-rental/ - they suggested my cuckoo-back-in-the-nest stepson should be paying us £593.80 a month. What are your views?

Veterinarian your rent maybe only £550 but what are your bills on top
Community charge
Gas
Electric
Water rates
Contents insurance
Food and household items

Then you have the cost of setting up a home. Even fully furnished you would need bedding, towels, kitchen equipment, tv, vacuum cleaner and other cleaning equipment.

added all up I bet your total living costs are not far short of the higher figure and that would be before the one off costs.

Spending one’s whole pay on self indulgence does not make for maturity or a pleasant person.

I can second that, though of course increased savings are an option.

My BIL is getting incredibly cheap board - £120 a month - out of approximately £750 take home. Age 19, he is into heavily branded and designer clothes.

He requested designer gifts for Christmas. My husband couldn't find one of the things he wanted, and was fretting about the (designer) substitute he got. Said he hoped it was ok when BIL opened it. BIL gave a very sullen thanks. Then perked up when he opened the 'right' gift next.

What did he get us? Some £10 piece of tat from Tiger between us.

When I see people on here fret about their 'DC deserving nice things, why shouldn't they have nice things just because they're younger', I wince. It's character building to work your way up the ladder of life!

Why are you asking your adult child where they are going and what they are doing everyday

Firstly because they live in the same house as me, they are family and it is polite.
Never understand this attitude of living in a bubble once they turn 18.

Secondly if they are going to come back late then I lock the doors and I don’t want to get up to let them in

I don’t think it is living in a bubble.
Mine are free to come and go as they wish. They have keys so I no one needs to be awake to let anyone in.

If one comes down looking particularly smart I might ask if they are going anywhere nice but if they don’t want to give the details they are free to just give a general answer like out for a meal or meeting the lads to watch the football.
I am incredibly lucky with my sons in that they have never felt the need to do the rebel thing and I trust them to be safe.
The only rule I have is no random girls but a girlfriend is fine. Lucky again mine don’t seem to do the ons thing and is in a committed relationship.

Dontsweat

By your own admission you are lucky with your boys. Not everyone is that lucky. Although I am not in favour of wrapping kids up in cotton wool there are situations where more caution is required.

Thecats

I am totally with you on this! The obsession with brands is one of my pet hates. I have been lucky enough to be able to afford big brands and even designer almost my whole life but am trying to raise my kids the way my charity shop loving mum raised me :) Not easy with the advertising and peer pressure around but possible I hope...

Thats not to say I dont have and allow treats or nice things. Just dont believe nice/treat HAS to be linked to brands or even the cost at all...

But each to their own. I have been called interfering when asking a 9 year old nephew (who has an iphone) why an apple watch is necessary 🙊

Brands is a weird one as none of mine wear the big known brands but to wear the same brands as their friends so gymshark and the like. Not particularly cheap but not the sort of brand you see everywhere and part of the overall brand culture but still a brand.

Wow....£670 here. I didn't even own that during my first few years of working life living at home.

As soon as I did start earning regular money my mum charged me £400 all in which was 40% of my take home pay. I hated it at the time, but when I started saving and eventually moved out she gave it back to me and paid my deposit on my first flat, as she'd been saving it for me the whole time. I will be eternally grateful for both the help getting on the ladder, as well as the lesson it taught me in budgeting and being sensible with my money!

Dontsweat

With DS1 I am lucky in that he is very concerned about morals and ethics as well as the environment and has specifically said not to buy him anything except underwear and socks unless its from a charity shop. DS2 and DD are a different story🙄

FluffyBunny

Your mum is my hero 😊

@mixedkebab I know, she's an absolute legend....I only wish I had realised at the time instead of giving her nothing but grief!

Mine came up as more than twice my mortgage

£616 apparently. Enough to cover my rent, council tax and gas and electric in exchange for a box room

my 22 year old and my live-in bf should be paying £715.40 each according to the calculator ... they pay £400 each. I pay £960!
balance is off somewhere I think :0)

Looking online under the rent a room scheme (lodger the rent is around £100 per week inc. of all utilities.

@FluffyBunnykins

Ha! Just worked out how to tag or mention or whatever!

She sounds like it! I am sure if she felt the same way about you ⚘( Note to self: start appreciating mum more)

I think it depend more on your children's income. If they are earning more then £40,000 a year they should pay more than someone with an intermittent income.
But there are some really selfish comments on here from some who don't want to pay a fair share !
I'd like to compare it to when I first stated working. I earned £5 a week and was expected to give my parents £3. And I would never have dreamt of arguing. They still expected me to do the dishes !

It says more than my entire bills. Definitely not right there!

£1,024.76!

I charged my children to live at home if they were earning but I saved the money in a separate account and gave it to them to use for their new deposit.