To ask why you didn't/don't want children?

[alfie22]

I'm in no way judging anybody who have decided not to have DCs.

But I am genuinely intrigued for the reasons why after reading a thread about somebody's DD not wanting children.

What are your reasons for not having children? Would there any be "what ifs" further down the line?

Just a question for the parents who are judging child free people - why do you care? What makes you wonder why they have no children?

I don't think I've ever wondered that about my friends or family members without children.

Also 14 year olds are a funny breed. My 14yo finds his child free uncle the coolest person in the world - single bachelor with a great house, and great consoles! So its not a given at all that teens will think child free people are boring.

Plus, in our family we've always encouraged the kids to talk to all members of their family of all ages. To stop interacting with someone just because they are no longer deemed cool smacks of disrespect, regardless of whether the teens think the family members are cool or not.

@AmICrazyorWhat2 your kids sound rude and you sound delightful in indulging that.

Adults: I hate children. They are annoying and boring and taking up space on an overcrowded planet.
Children: My aunt and uncle are boring.
Adults: (gasp) Your children are rude!

@RiversDisguise in real life and dealing with real people, adults who think children are boring tend to either fake politeness or avoid them. Children being rude to adults lacks the fundamental respect that children should have for adults. I know it's an unfashionable view these days, but most of us grew up learning how to keep our gobs shut around people we find boring or irritating. It is also rude and disrespectful for parents to support their children acting that way.

Children don't know I find them dull.
Many adults who I work with don't know I find them annoying.

The reason for that is because when I was a child my parents taught me that it wasn't big and wasn't clever to express each and every thought.

You know, I haven’t even looked at the ‘why did you have kids’ thread? It’s nothing to do with me, the same as a thread on owning a horse or a caravan would be - of no interest at all, so it’s interesting that so many mothers post on this thread

Children don't know I find them dull.

Children are far more perceptive than you give them credit for, but overall I don't disagree with your post. I'm sure the poster does encourage tact, but it is something you have to keep reenforcing. My eldest emailed my brother, "My mum says you fart a lot" last week. Of course I gently reprimanded her and kept my smiles to myself- but her uncle proudly posted it on FB. You can be more honest and relaxed within families.

it’s interesting that so many mothers post on this thread

Fancy that... on a public thread on a site ostensibly aimed at mothers. Who'd a thunk.

Well it’s not that interesting, since something made you look further into a site called mumsnet

To pp that is

You know, I haven’t even looked at the ‘why did you have kids’ thread? It’s nothing to do with me, the same as a thread on owning a horse or a caravan would be - of no interest at all, so it’s interesting that so many mothers post on this thread

I skimmed it but didn’t post even though all the posts about how everyone is selfish before they have kids made me really want to.

@AriaFitz Please dont ever change your mind about kids. You sound great as you are!

I’ve been on Mumsnet about 10 years, probably Googled something about cooking and a thread popped up. Just interesting that I have no interest in that thread but have lots of mums trying (a little too hard) to tell us we’re wrong. WTF difference does it make to them,
Methinks they do protest too much

No I don’t care really. Your idea of what it’s like doesn’t fit with my experience, so I posted that, but so what I don’t want anyone to change their mind.

What I really don't understand though is why there are do many of you who don't want children on MUMSnet????

For the love of God, someone fetch me a bottle of gin or a gun. Or both.

What I really don't understand though is why there are do many of you who don't want children on MUMSnet????

Jaysus, does no one read the bloody thread anymore?

And they all think they're the first person to say it. Like it's some great original thought.

Zzzz.

*And they all think they're the first person to say it. Like it's some great original thought.

Zzzz.*.

More to be pitied than scorned

lol sure

No I don’t care really. Your idea of what it’s like doesn’t fit with my experience, so I posted that, but so what I don’t want anyone to change their mind

Why post though? It’s about why we don’t have kids, not what we’re missing out on, or have done wrong - WHY WE DONT HAVE/WANT KIDS that’s it

People are free to have children or not.

But I can't stand those who bang on about how much they hate them. You wouldn't dare say it about many other groups in society.

Why post?
Initially because I thought it might be interesting, ok probably wrong in hindsight

Then someone said something about people with children having more compassion - which I disagreed with.

Then all the drudge drudge posts made me think oh it’s not really

And that was it

That, and posting twee advice after a hundred and seventy two identical comments, should be worthy of a ban.

Arseholes.

What’s the twee advice

Ironically, my DC (14 & 11) now tell me they have little interest in their childfree aunts and uncles

Oh. Maybe I should rewrite my will.

Like every decision in life their are pros and cons. I felt emotionally driven to have DC, but mentally questioned this as found other people's DC annoying.

I have DC and I love and I'm grateful for having them, but I would support them if they choose not to have DC themselves. It's more easily possible to have varied experiences without DC, more money, more time, less anxiety etc. I would support their decision either way.