To feel so bloody nervous to go out to event on my own ?

[TheGardenisMine]

There's a village fair starting in twenty minutes literally a two minute walk from my front door.

It's sunny, I've nothing pressing to do, they may sell plants but am shaking at thought of walking out the door on my own.

Recently separated from an abuser. But thought I was "getting there" then this !!

Is it worth putting myself through feeling this sick ?

Have you been leaving the house to do other things?

How about telling yourself you’re only going for 5 minutes to have a look?

Only twice to the doctors over the last few weeks, but actually haven't spoken to anyone else. Or been anywhere.

I'm a bit clammy at thought of it. Not sure of if it's really busy then I can mingle without drawing attention or if it's dead quite I'm going to stick out !

Set yourself one tiny achievable goal, like buying one plant, give yourself a really short time to be out, then just do it. It will make you feel a little bit better, and if it's easier than you thought, you can repeat it later in the morning. Baby steps are really hard, but you can do it.

Quiet!

I second baby steps. You can do this op. What kind of plant would you like to buy?

Why don’t you go and tell yourself you will have a look for five minutes and if you are ok you can stay longer. Go but dont put pressure on yourself.

I'm a bit clammy at thought of it. Not sure of if it's really busy then I can mingle without drawing attention or if it's dead quite I'm going to stick out!

That’s why I would set one goal that doesn’t put pressure on you - whether it’s staying for 2 minutes or looking at only one stall. The fact that the market is so near your house means you can come straight home if it starts to feel overwhelming.

Thank you for replying by the way. I've no one in RL to talk to.

I've an inkling to go to village shop to get a paper or something which means skirting round the fete but it'll be in view ...

But even that sounds daunting ...

@Bodear am new to gardening so to be honest just anything that looks like I won't kill it in five minutes!

Pop some sunglasses on. Then you won't have to worry about making eye contact with anyone.

You aren't in Devon, are you? There's a fete in the next village to me. I'd be happy to meet you at the plant stall and grab a hot drink together...!

Oh no not Devon . But it's lovely of you to offer .

Put earphones in attached to your phone, you pretend to be on a call or listening to music.

Sunglasses ready.

I think I may just wait for it to get underway a bit .

Yes you absolutely can do this. If the fair is daunting just go out for a walk and, no pressure, see how it goes. The garden is absolutely bloody yours!! Have you seen the documentary on Nadia and anxiety? Her CBT was about doing the things that made her anxious. Sending you strength and positivity.

Don't wait. Just go. Hand hold here.

I really really struggled with stuff like this due to panic attacks. The reality is nobody will notice you, they're too busy looking at stalls/thinking what's for tea/oh I'm hungry/what is my child doing
Go for 5 mins, and come back before you're ready to leave. Eventually it gets easier and easier but the trick is to leave before you get worried

Who is Nadia ? I'll look for that , am just getting used to watching what I like on tv.

It's ok to be terrified. Just know it will pass and nothing bad will happen as a result.

Nadia was a previous winner of bake off.

I get it. My anxiety has been so bad in the past that I haven't been able to get to the shop 5 mins away. I once set off and had a panic attack halfway there and had to come home.

You absolutely can do this, agree with pp that to overcome anxiety you have to do the things that make you anxious. Sunglasses on, head up, tits out and own it

www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m00053fy

Know how you feel it took me ages to leave the house after I left my husband, I literally did the Nursery run and that was it.

Baby Steps, you don't have to talk to anyone. Just go have a look, don't feel obliged to buy anything.

Phew.. am overwhelmed at all your replies!

Sunglasses definitely needed as you've made me tearful with all your lovely.

Am just going to wait until half past....

Take it slowly I would go to get a paper first and go on from there taking it in baby steps as suggested.
Are you worried about meeting someone you know or someone who knows of your circumstances if so just ignore them sweetie,I too wish I lived close to you and could be of help.
If you don't make it to the fete at least you can sit in your garden and read a Sunday Paper at your ease,knowing you have made the first steps.