To feel so bloody nervous to go out to event on my own ?

[TheGardenisMine]

There's a village fair starting in twenty minutes literally a two minute walk from my front door.

It's sunny, I've nothing pressing to do, they may sell plants but am shaking at thought of walking out the door on my own.

Recently separated from an abuser. But thought I was "getting there" then this !!

Is it worth putting myself through feeling this sick ?

That cake is going to taste so good because it represents you being wonderful and brave - enjoy every crumb! This has been really uplifting to read.

Well done OP

Yay! Well done. I’m jealous of your cake now! What flavour did you buy?

Proud of you OP and of the lovely MNetters who were there for you

I hope you're having a lovely time at the fete OP!!

Remember the thought is far worse than the reality. Go with an aim, the plant stall followed by the cake stall perhaps then leave, it's always easier to go to things alone with a list I find (even the city centre, I only go because I have something to achieve and I'm not overly nervous personality wise). Otherwise is there someone who can walk with you, a neighbour maybe? I used to walk to the village shop with mine because she couldn't leave the house alone when I moved there, by the time I left she could go to the coop, not much but for her an amazing achievement

Well Done
And when you have a decision to make and it really doesn't matter too much what your choice is so long as you choose one.

Toss a coin.

You will either agree with it and do it - or you will realised that isn't what you want to do and do the opposite. It really doesn't matter which - you have made a decision and followed through.

Well done you!

Now I want cake.

Very well done TheGardenisMine, you should feel very, very proud of yourself 🙂
But dam you, I now NEED cake!!😂🍰

Sorry about mentioning cake had a slice for lunch.. why not I'm on a roll today!

It was bloody lovely like a Christmas cake without the marzipan and icing stuff I hate.

Thegardenismine I'm going to share a tiny bit of my anxiety, PTSD bastarding bullshit with you, in the hope it gives you courage.

I live in a ground floor flat and have always had flowers in pots (I've lived her for 25 years)

A couple of months ago, every, single pot was stolen. I had 3 lavenders, a rhododendron and spring flowers. My fear and anxiety went through the roof, for various reasons.

My pots are directly outside my backdoor and I wasn't aware of anyone being so close to my home.
I'm the only person around here who has flowers, everyone knows I'm the woman with the flowers, so it felt really personal.

I was too frightened to replant, because I didn't know how I would mentally cope if everything was stolen again.

I then thought bollocks! I was getting so upset at the bare space, I went out and bought new pots and flowers. As much as I was worried, I felt better for trying to be optimistic.

Touch wood, they've been left alone. Although I did drill holes in the pots and link them all together with that bendy garden wire, so if any fucker tries to nick them again, they'll get a surprise (and hopefully pull their back!)
You carry on pushing forward at your own speed!

Much better!

What a lovely thread and for you OP, well done!

Now every time you look at your little Freedom Plants you can remember that YOU were brave, YOU overcame, YOU survived. Just like they have; and together you will THRIVE.

Courage dear heart, courage!

Yay!

TheGardenisMine I'm really pleased for you!
finnmcool that looks fab. Your resilience is amazing

Malbecfan Thank you so much!
I think in life, we have to keep pushing forward at our own speed.
We all get there in the end, and I'm a fan of taking my time on the scenic route.
I think many people need to take the slower, meandering scenic route, because you can't rush feeling better, even though it's frustrating.

Well done! You should be really proud of yourself

So glad you went and got lovely plants and cake. A good day all round! And there will be many more.

@finnmcool what an inspiring person you are ! I've not been much of a gardener over the years. Wherever I've lived it's been an outdoor space for the children, bbq and sunbathing! But now I have this piece of garden that is mine I'm delighted to see things I plant actually grow and flower. It's been an amazing comfort to me lately. Your little piece of greenery shows you definitely have green fingers! Thank you so much for sharing your story. Hope the little buggers who stole from you never come back! Xx

Just read your updates OP, well done!

Fantastic OP. Really well done!

@TheGardenisMine thank you for your incredibly kind words, especially because you had a stressful morning!
I really do love my little patch of greenery!

I'm sure I'm not the only one on here, who would love picture updates on your plants
It really is satisfying watching your hard work grow and flourish isn't it?

Actually, that's a good analogy. Where you keep pushing forward, all of a sudden, you will turn around and see how far you've come.

Well done again for today, you are braver than you give yourself credit for and it was a big, positive step forward!

I absolutely love Mumsnet for the solidarity and support, women standing together and holding each other up.
If the little fuckers come back, I'll put out an alert on here! I've got images of a load of amazing women in mumsnet scarves, protecting my flowers

I wish you nothing but the best in life and judging by today, you've got this!

Gardenismine

What a great update, sounds as though you had a lovely time.

Now.Where are we going next weekend? TIme to get the local paper out and see what's occurin'. Don't forget, we'll come with you, especially if there's cake.

Well done op, so pleased for you

Well done OP!