If you're female AIBU to ask if you're ok with male health professionals at all times and in any scenario?

[DockerDre]

It's just that question really.

@EleanorOalike, I would have asked straight away how to make a written complaint. In my experience as an admin person in healthcare, that sort of behavior is fortunately rare these days, but should be called out and dealt with severely

Male or female hcp makes no difference to me. The male hcps I've seen have been more gentle in any case.

Who on earth's said women should be forced to have male hcps?!
I don't think anyone's said anything of the sort?!

That was to Brick beard by the way

I used to know a male colleague who got a bit offended about it saying they implied he was less professional than the doctor or less capable of his job than a female equivalent.

A twat then?

I used the expression “women’s mysteries” in a vaguely jocular fashion on a thread about men midwives recently. I’ve been thinking about it since- and I find I honestly do feel that some things should be kept between women. Childbirth and menstruation for example. Obviously i’m not saying men should be ignorant of these things, or that I would reject a male HCP if I needed one. But I don’t see any reason why men have to be involved in everything. I was very ambivalent about that recent (very blokey) campaign about dads and periods too. Yes, I know there are single dads but for most girls surely it’s a woman they would want to talk to about periods?

With the usual caveats about women who would prefer to see a male HCP, and single dads.

LimeKiwi someone did, further back in the thread.

I complained about my lack of privacy in a Spire Private hospital - I was left topless while people walked in and out of the room for 30 mins, there was in no door knocking, no attempt to give me any privacy, no curtains between me and the door - all the hcp in attendance were male - I complained at the time, not about everyone being male - just lack of privacy - my complaints were minimised - a male nurse asked me to put my complaints in writing as he had tried to do something about it before. My written complaints were minimised too. So I brought it up with my main consultant - who was appalled, he told me the NHS had long adopted better procedures for the privacy of patients - he said most women (especially elderly women) feel they can't question procedure, they feel vulnerable and don't say anything and said he would stop referring until they addressed it and adopted the NHS guidelines.

Like I said Lime, a thankfully small minority. Most people are appalled by the idea even if they themselves are happy to be treated by men.

However, one poster has described it as bigotry and that women shouldn’t be allowed to choose on the NHS. Another poster has scoffed at the idea of ‘socially constructed ideas about privacy’. A couple of posters have ridiculed the idea that anyone should care what genitalia their hcp has. All of those comments either outright say or imply that women should not be given a choice.

@Outanabout, the receptionist will have been acting as a chaperone. Their role is to protect the patient and doctor, they should be available for an intimate examination by an HCP of the opposite sex. The chaperone should be aware of what is going on but not, for example, be looking at your genitals when you have an internal, their presence should be recorded on your record.

I work in MH with men

They will often ask me to make an appointment to see a male GP and sometimes I ask if they would prefer to see a male

Nothing is said about this it’s just accepted I don’t ask why as it’s not relevant

Yes, I am always fine with a male health professional.

DisFor I understand why the receptionist was in the room. I don't understand why she watched proceedings 🤣🤣🤣🤣

I’ve been thinking about it since- and I find I honestly do feel that some things should be kept between women. Childbirth and menstruation for example

Good for you. I support your right to choose only female HCPs but don't seek to make a choice for me.

I don't want to only have to see female HCPs for the things that you have decided should only be kept between women. Why are you trying to force your views onto other women? Can you honestly not see that what you are doing - trying to remove choice - is exactly what you are accusing others of doing?

You do you. Choose whoever you want to be your HCPs. Totally support that but what a load of claptrap to say that certain things need to only be kept between women.

Does being a woman mean that all female drs and nurses are going to be sympathetic, competent and respectful when dealing with periods and childbirth? Of course it doesn't. So what you are advocating for is sub standard care in some cases, so long as it is delivered by a woman we should accept it?

How on earth is that in women's best interests?

@CaptainBrickbeard
But just as you, rightly, are calling out people dismissing a woman's right to choose why aren't you also calling out Betrand for saying that some issues should only be between women? That too is removing choice and is equally wrong.

I'm just cracking up at the thought of my doctor's receptionist peering up my vagina as I was being examined. I had male gynaes for both my children, and a nurse would be present when I was examined, but they were just a body in the room for protocol, they weren't watching what the doctor was doing.

The final line of Bertrand’s post includes a caveat about women who prefer male hcps. She isn’t suggesting the removal of choice.

“Good for you. I support your right to choose only female HCPs but don't seek to make a choice for me.”

I’m not. You must have missed my caveats.

Hasn't bothered me in the past and I don't think it would bother me in the future,I suppose it probably depends on scenario. I can understand why somebody might find it uncomfortable though.

I have no issues with male HCP. It's their jobs and I'm happy to place my trust in them.

Was irritated when my male GP wouldn't examine me for a gynae issue and I had to make another appointment with a female. Waste of NHS time.

Prefer female for gynae stuff. Wouldn't like a smear done by a man.

No I don't mind. And I say that as someone who has been sexually assaulted by 2 previous partners.

have found privacy more violated by female nurses "we're all women here" than by male or female doctors.

Oddly female HCP this last year have been ones to push me to leave DD1 - nothing to do with periods or sex and we hadn't requested feamale just who was there.

I can understand them checking – it had occurred to me to check with her - but it was how pushy they were even after she’d physically grabbed hold of me to stop me going.

There was implication of her being silly – which stopped when I said she was 13 and wanted me there. Then turned out they’d some how massively misjudged her age.

However even if she was over 16 and it’s hard to see how they could have gone beyond that and she wanted me there I’d have been there – ( and if she didn’t I wouldn't have been there) .

Some things should be kept between women like childbirth

That's fine if you think that, you do you.
The great thing about it is we have a choice though, so who are you to say no men for the rest of us?
I honestly don't mind who sees to me.

I don't think I would have a problem with this, although i think all smear tests, etc have been done by females. I had a breast exam from a male doctor once and he just quietly brought a female nurse into the room to observe so I wasn't alone with him. No fuss made, but I appreciated it. I would be uncomfortable being alone with a male HCP doing intimate stuff.