If you're female AIBU to ask if you're ok with male health professionals at all times and in any scenario?

[DockerDre]

It's just that question really.

I’m one of those that’s more bothered by competency than sex. Totally get that others don’t feel the same though.

Yes, comfortable with either sex.

They are presumably properly trained and have seen everything thousands of times before.

prefer biological women.

oh and ds sometimes prefers a male dr.

I have never cared about my health care provider's gender. As long as they seem warm and empathetic, I'm happy.

I have no idea why anyone who's not given birth is allowed anywhere near a woman giving birth.

You do realise that not even all the female HCP involved in a birth gave birth themselves,have or even want children.

A few years ago, I would have had no issue. I still don't request female HCP's for anything in particular. However, as recent years have gone by, I have needed more medical treatment than at other times in my life. I have noticed that some men have made me feel very uncomfortable (and yes, some women have too, but we are taking 1 or 2 out of about 30 in total who I have really found unpleasant humans). They have been a mixture of rude, failing to understand women's issues (eg. Why am I so upset about developing allergies - because I leak urine when I sneeze. And I now sneeze a lot), making gender sterotype comments, and being incredibly patronising.

I’m one of those that’s more bothered by competency than sex. Totally get that others don’t feel the same though.

That makes it sound like an either/or choice though.

I start from the assumption that any person in their job will be competent (unless I have reason to think otherwise). Just there are some situations I feel more comfortable with a competent woman in preference to a competent man.

One of the loveliest, kindest and most attentive midwives I had when having DD was male. He was a trainee and was observed but he was so sweet. The older females I had were very different, just in, poke about, out again, no bedside manner. Anytime he had to do much as take my blood pressure he was checking I was ok, was I comfortable. At one point he had to check internally and the whole time he was asking was it painful, and apologising.
If you need someone medical, all I care about is how good they are at their job and how polite they are. Gender doesn't come into it for me.

I’m fine with either for myself, for anything- but put that down to horrific health problems in my teens which meant I had what felt like half of London’s qualified and student medical professionals look up my foof on multiple occasions.

But I respect anyone’s wishes to choose a HCP of the same sex as them

No.
Would want female HCP for smear tests, mammograms, period issues.
And just in-case you're interested, that's biologically female, not just 'identifying as’

This.

And I take competency for granted until proven otherwise.

Nope, I want to talk to a woman and be examined by a woman.

Generally, I’d rather see a woman for everything but don’t have a problem with men for non gyane stuff.

When I had my first baby I loved the womanhood of giving birth- all those wonderful women! although I had a lot of obstetrician care they were all female too.

The only men involved were a male midwife who ran a sample up to SCBU (but that was on an emergency alarm, the whole unit was in the room) and the assistant anaesthetist was Male (but I think we can all agree no one cares what gender the anaesthetist is, as long as they bring the drugs. The anaesthetist in charge was female)

Ironically, the person who did my EMCS was a Male. He didn’t even introduce himself before I was put under which is quite rude and typical I thought. Bet a woman would’ve at least come and said hi before slashing your tummy open.

Anyway I’m due to give birth again any day now bad have seriously thought about whether I would accept a Male midwife. I think I would rather not, and suspect I’d be too afraid to hurt his feelings to tell him that. I just hope it doesn’t happen.

Yes and Yes.

Doesn't bother me at all. I've had some excellent male doctors dealing with female health issues. I appreciate that not everyone will have had the same experience though.

But I've also had to request that a female doctor did not care for my son during his cancer treatment as she was totally unsuitable and had zero empathy for treating children. Apparently being 8 years old, feeling like crap and scared about repeated cannulisation that he demonstrated through crying and being distressed translated to being 'difficult, sneaky and manipulative.'

We made a formal complaint as the silly cow had written it in his notes that lived at the end of his bed that we read daily. She had to apologise and we never saw her again. I hope she's a pathologist now. That's the only job she had a suitable bedside manner for.

Yes. They are professionals.

I would always choose a female HCP, have switched GP surgery to do so and have requested (and been granted) female care in hospital.

Having had a male doctor sarcastically ask me "how many years my medical training took" when I told him I needed trimethoprim for a UTI I knew was on its way (that he refused to give without a test, which meant a week later when the test came back I was already in hospital).
And
A male consultant who told me I wasn't in labour, and berated (loudly and publicly) the young, trainee female midwife who disagreed with him (I was). The same man later pushed DD out of me, and cut me without telling me.
And
A male GP who told me my bleeding during and after sex was a result of me "being too energetic" (it wasn't).
And
An older male doctor rubbish my fears when I finally plucked up the courage to see him about rectal bleeding (took me 2 more years to go back to a doctor, and when I did the colonoscopy discovered 4 polyps that were removed immediately, and the yearly recall gets at least one each time...)
And
numerous Male military doctors dismiss my fears and symptoms leading to worse outcomes every time.

I will fight as hard as possible to ensure my rights are protected to ensure same sex medical care for all.

Fifteen years ago I'd have said anyone competent is fine. Now there are some things I insist on a female for - smear tests and physiotherapy. I find it incredibly difficult to relax when someone I don't know is touching me, but it's twice as bad if it's a male.

That doesn't mean I don't think males can be great clinicians (for example, my fertility consultant is male and there is nobody I trust more in that respect) I just believe there should be a choice wherever possible.

So much of medical scientific data is based on male bodies too.

Men are very nice for, (can't actually think of reasons here)........
but I really don't see the point of them in a medical setting.

For me, anyway.

I’m fine with either (& I’ve been on the receiving end of some very inappropriate behaviour from male gps) I have also had some very good male gps & been dismissed & reduced to tears by female ones.
So yes I wouldn’t care about the sex of the HCP.

I don't mind being treated or examined by a male doctor but I will support any woman who feels differently and requests a female doctor.

No issues with a male professional at all.

Surely choosing a GP by sex shouldn’t be seen as a reflection on competency or professionalism?

I like to see female doctors for gynea issues. Some of the tests I’ve had for infertility were invasive, painful and quite humiliating. I don’t think I could have done them in front of a male doctor.

I had a male ultra sound technician do my internal scan when I miscarried. It was a stressful situation and having him do the scan made it worse. I had no chaperone.

I know that others wouldn’t feel this way but I did.

It doesn’t bother me but I understand completely why it would bother other women and I defend their right to specify.