To ask when you've been embarrassed by your pet?

[AIBUPODCAST]

Producer Amanda has a myriad of tales about her childhood dog behaving appallingly in public (the local bowls club erected a HUGE gate to keep him from digging holes on the green), so Lucy & Aasmah would LOVE to hear some stories from the forum!

tkband3 that's made me feel better about being seen pulling grass out of my dog's butt.

As we waited to board the ferry to France, (after a long walk on the beach), Goldiepup's tum gave an ominous grumble.
We got her out of the camper van, but had to put her back as we were holding up loading. We had no choice but to leave her and Oldiegoldie as on that crossing they have to stay in the vehicle.

When we got back to the van, we could smell it as soon as we got on the car deck. A quick look confirmed it- two golden retrievers covered in shit, it was everywhere- cupboards, doors, it had filled DH's shoes.
Every one was commenting on the dreadful pong, we drove off with windows wound right down.
The French passport control man recoiled in horror- you could see his opinion of "les Anglais" hit a new low.

We had to head straight to the beach for the dogs to have a swim while I did my best to clear up with anti vaccination spray and baby wipes.
It's a good job MN doesn't have smellovision is all I can say.

My dog (large) once peed on another person's (small) dog. I was utterly horrified and completely lost for words.

BollockstoBrexit. Yep, know the feeling. I was at a friend’s place and her cat dragged a joint of roast beef through the door. We didn’t hear any yells or swearing from the neighbours so we discretely wrapped it up, buried it in the kitchen bin and pretended it had never happened.

Of course my cat wouldn’t do such a thing. Why would he when he can hoick valuable, prize winning koi carp out of the neighbour’s pond? I blamed a heron. Apparently I am the only person locally that has seen the heron.......

Having a new Client around (home office at the time) to talk about requirements etc when Dcat1 came into the room with one of my laciest naughtiest Bras. He started to pull it to bits on the floor at potential new customers feet. Very embarrassing and a total conversation killer.
Found my contraception pill packet in the hallway with a Monday missing as well
Little shit.

We live near some very large and swanky houses, and one Saturday evening we were walking our two spaniels off the lead (on the other side of a very quiet road where said houses are situated). One of the houses was obviously having a party and the front door was left ajar. Well I’m sure you can guess what happened next, the wee shite (who is normally impeccably well behaved off the lead) legged it up the garden path and sashayed straight into the house.

We ran over to the front door and peered in and thankfully the woman who owned the house found it hilarious, she even invited ‘D’Dog to come in and meet her guests 🙈 she promptly brought him back out when he started eating crisps off the coffee table though. He is such a shite.

Every time he meets someone new he sniffs their crotch. So embarrassing. He’s exactly the right/wrong height too

I’ve got one of those he’s a greyhound and his big pointy nose is right at bum/crotch height. So embarrassing.

I forgot until now of the time that The Late Merlin, a fluffy black ball of feline evil, sprayed my (then not ex) partner. He was sitting up in bed, reading, complaining that the cat had pissed in the bedroom. Yup, all over his groin! Battle for male dominance or what?

Our cat dug up a freshly planted bedding plant in our neighbors garden and promptly pooped in the hole left behind.

Luckily she's well known in the street and everyone loves her so she got away with it.

Whenever I take Dcat to the vets and he has his temperature taken he literally backs up onto the thermometer

My labradoodle greeted another dog and its owner so enthusiastically while on a walk that he ended up running around us in circles, lashing us together with his lead.

I’d never seen the bloke before and he ended up squashed up against my tits with a full poo bag perilously close to his face.

It was three years ago and he still smirks when I pass him

My dog got chucked out of training school for being too naughty.

My dog took a shit on camera in the background during animal hospital. And behind the wickets during County cricket match.

When we got back from holiday and the next door neighbour told me my cat had jumped through the dormer window at 1am and got into bed with them

Our new neighbours had a rather swish looking potted plant outside their front door. We were chatting to the new neighbours, turned round to see our cat was squatting over their pot, paws on the sides, pissing everywhere.

We were walking through town with DDog one Boxing Day morning, on the way to lunch at a friend's. We'd forgotten about the Boxing Day hunt and as it was packed, decided to stop and watch until they'd set off.

As more people joined, we ended up at the front and DDog was happliy greeting every hound that came his way. It gradually dawned on me that people were laughing and pointing in our direction. I looked round, then down and all I could see was a small puddle of dog pee ... and some splashes on the toe of a policeman's boot ... and a damp streak down the leg of the policeman's trousers.

The same DDog was staying with a friend. When she let him out of her car at the park one morning, he ran straight across the car park and shat on the bumper of a Mercedes.

She was beyond embarrassed and pretended she hadn't seen, but thought the shaking of her shoulders may have given her away.

The first night he stayed at her house, she shut him in the utility room with her dogs. He opened the utility room door, the kitchen door and her bedroom door and joined her and her husband in bed.

Many years ago my incredibly cat hating older brother had to take my SIL’s beloved little tabby to the vets.
At the time he had no car and had to hop on a bus with the little cat and a huge hangover!
Kato then proceeded to shit all over the travel box and he had to sit for the rest of the journey wafting cat shit smell all over a packed bus - he’s still upset about it 25 years on!!

I have a Jack Russell who is a total arsehole quite spirited. A couple of years ago I took him for his boosters and not only did the vet need to put him in a chokehold to give him the injection, he was in such a bad mood on the walk home he grabbed the hem of an elderly man’s trousers and almost knocked him over I was MORTIFIED. The poor man hadn’t done a thing apart from walk past us, and he was very kind about it

A previous cat attracted a lot of attention from my neighbour, who was oddly entranced by her frequent kills - you'd see the cat crouched eating something and cries of "Oooooo clever kitty, arrrggghhh is that for mummy?, Eeeeeek, what will daddy say?" and more

It got so that I ignored it, until one day when the shrieks seemed even louder and longer over whatever-it-was

"It" was the neighbour's budgie

We went for a walk the other week and our chocolate lab and spaniel were off lead. We were on a fairly narrow bridleway. Both dogs have been socialised around horses since they were tiny. Spaniel happily runs past the two horses, stopping mid way along them for a wee. Lab- no chance. Wouldn’t move. Horses stopped to let us walk past, DH put labs lead on and starts trying to tug her through. She is having none of it. In the end, I had to pick her up and carry her through the gap while the horses were laughing at her. She’s a muppet!

Now departed DDog was walking off lead on the beach in the middle of winter. Absolutely not picnicing weather so I thought we were safe. However someone was feeling particularly brave and Ddog spelt it from over 100yards away. Before I knew what was happening he was sat on someone's knee eating the other end of the sausage roll they had in their mouths. I honestly considered pretending she wasnt mine.

I've just remembered the time my cat sauntered into the neighbors house, jumped into their bin and then walked off with a piece of chicken. My neighbor said she didn't know what to do, the cat didn't seem to care that she'd been seen.
She used to go in a different neighbors house whenever she got the chance, go up the stairs and then starfish on her bed. That neighbor did bring it on herself though as the neighbor was always feeding my cat ham.

my horse has always been very good to catch from the field...except if there are good looking builder types around the yard...at which point he likes to show me up by constantly running away until I am a sweaty, swearing, undignified mess 😳🙈🙈

yes this has happened more times than I'd like to admit...with the same men 😂😂

I used to live on a holiday complex abroad and had a huge, very gregarious cat who loved making friends with holidaymakers; I'd often come home from work to find him sprawled across an unsuspecting tourist on a sunbed next to the pool Just what they wanted in 35c heat; his photo would regularly appear on TripAdvisor

One evening I heard shrieks coming from the car park; I rushed down to see a crowd gasping in horror - boycat had found a huge black snake and was batting and tormenting it in front of his captive audience I hurriedly removed him, muttering 'Well, he's never done THAT before!'

Walking dog on the beach after work. As we got closer to a family sat on the sand, with their football near by. Dog pads up to said football, cocks his leg for a fairly long wee and then walks off quite pleased with himself. We’d been walking for at least half an hour before hand, so plenty legging cocking opportunities. Very embarrassing, the family claimed not to mind but we passed them on the return journey when the man was trying to wash the ball in the sea...... He’s usually such a good boy