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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To walk out of hen do.

138 replies

Burlea · 26/05/2019 12:10

Last night there was about 15 ladies at a friends house. She is getting married for the 3rd time next Saturday. Unfortunately her 1st husband died, her 2nd marriage ended because she cheated with the man she marrys on Saturday.
We were drinking, chatting and laughing. No problems there until 3 ladies including the bride decided to talk about how they had cheated. The talk got more and more crude
as they were discussing 3somes, positions etc.It seemed as though they wanted to be the naughtiest. . Now I'm no prude but I am good friends with her ex-husband and also the ex-wife of the groom to be.(we live in a very small town). One person stood up and said I don't mind having a laugh but this is not funny as she walked out myself and another friend joined her.
This morning I got a group chat from the bride saying that us 3 are boring and that's what hen parties are about. Were we being UR.

OP posts:

Divebar · 27/05/2019 23:47

This is all very small town.

Patroclus · 28/05/2019 06:17

chriiiiiiiist people really dont read properly.

mrshousty · 28/05/2019 06:22

I'd have left too...

Sweetpea55 · 28/05/2019 06:26

If be happy to be called boring if it meant I wasn't crude common and chavvy

AudacityOfHope · 28/05/2019 06:45

Yeah @Ragwort because talking about sex is totally the same as being racist.

echt · 28/05/2019 07:01

Yeah @Ragwort because talking about sex is totally the same as being racist

That isn't what ragwort said.

They were not just talking about sex, it was very specifically about cheating, in a very particular situation.

Ragwort gave the instance of racist comments as an example of where someone might choose to leave the room. A comparison, though not saying they are the same.

NeatFreakMama · 28/05/2019 07:07

YANBU I don't mind crude talk but talking about cheating as if you're proud is gross.

AudacityOfHope · 28/05/2019 08:24

Yes, it was a ridiculous straw man of a non-comparison. Just like I pointed out.

Ragwort · 28/05/2019 08:33

Thank you echt, and I believe the principle is the same, if you are uncomfortable in any situation why should you have to sit there enduring the conversation? What is wrong with explaining you are are not comfortable with the discussion/comments and politely (not storming off) removing yourself from the situation?

Is it because the subject is about sex and you don’t want to look like a prude? . I would far rather look like a prude than sit listening to some ridiculous conversations about sex and cheating.

Rainbunny · 28/05/2019 10:40

YANBU OP!

I have a very healthy sexual (even pornographic) imagination but I can't stand people being crude, it's cringeworthy and comes across as common (clutches pearls... ) Your friends embarrassed themselves and they feel judged by three of you leaving, which to be fair was passing judgement but I don't blame you!

Turnitaroundagain · 29/05/2019 10:05

I hate all that sex and the city female sex talk. It’s a bit sad.

Bignosenobum · 30/05/2019 11:05

What a horrible person.

Bignosenobum · 30/05/2019 11:08

Why be friends with her. She will probably cheat again and be divorced.

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